Hyper Hill
NFL Bar Watching Guide [FamousDC]
Only in America [Antoine Dodson]
Quality over quantity [Starbucks]
Date Me [DC]
Famous Friday [Round Up]
Elizabeth Brotherton is following FamousDC on Twitter and crushing on George Clooney, Iris Garcia Grim joined our world, Shia loves pouring coffee on people and running away, Jay-Z wants you to vote, Tweeting on shrooms is the new Facebook status update, Wonderbox, Christine Delargy is a big timer, fly like a G6, vote for Whitey, POLITICO’s fault?, Al Gore does not approve this blog posting, come back Arty, Dan Steinberg vs. TBD, how a DC police officer ran over a Transformer, we were on the Krystal Ball ticket early, publicity stunt, Jim Fallows will only go so far for The Atlantic, and enjoy Gold Cup this weekend.
Did God throw this football at Favre?
[INSERT PENIS PIC JOKE HERE]
Guerrilla Campaigning 101: Always Sneak Up Behind the On-Air Reporter
Is that really Alvin Greene behind you?
Fantasy Football Rant – Week 6
The NFL season is in full swing and Brad Kanus has agreed to join us for another year.
FamousDC presents … Fantasy Football Rantworthy: Week 6
This week’s fantasy rant is honor of the fallen Crimson Tide. The Ol’ Ball Coach always has something special waiting under that visor for top ranked teams.
Enough about has-been teams – let’s get to the show.
1. The Cowboys are a lot like the Longhorns – lots of talent, zero discipline and very bad coaching. And let’s not forget, they are both literally the richest programs in their respective leagues.
2. Matt Forte… whatever. One lucky long run was the difference between a 10 point week and the 32 point week he had. Do not put a ring on the finger of the girl who can clean up nicely every once in a while. Put a ring on the finger of the girl who can put up 100 yards rushing and 50 yards receiving every game no matter who takes the snaps. Take notes people – these are rules to live by.
3. Antonio Gates and Drew Brees really are putting together a nice fantasy season. I’m not sure the Chargers will do much as team, but the duo has hooked up seven times for TDs and has made Gates better than every WR in the league this year. However, Cooley has a blog so I drafted him with Gates on the board. There’s something about being able to ridicule your fantasy players directly on their blog during the game. Also, Cooley has photographed his penis in the past, which we know is something all future NFL hall of famers do – see item #4.
4. Ben Rothletsgogetaburger – the live show.
Brett Favre – the abbreviated mobile device compatible version.
Somewhere in here there’s a commercial from Wrangler claiming to have successfully shielded many a woman from Favre’s penis. I can see the ad now “When I wear my Wranglers, nobody sees my penis. Real. Comfortable. Jeans.”
This Sterger chick can’t do anything now to save herself. If she cooperates with the NFL investigation she’s no better off than she is now having leaked the info that’s out there in the first place. You don’t pants the King of Football and get rewarded for doing so.
Favre was one more retirement away form joining the most famous saying in America “It’s as American as Chevrolet and Apple Pie.” The committee that governs the saying was going to put “Brett Favre” after “Chevrolet” after this season. Sterger has brought that plan to an abrupt halt.
What Sterger needs to understand is that Brett Favre is Brett Favre and that one day she’ll be ugly and possibly fat. He wins. She should have just met him the hotel room and let him run one up the middle. She has no idea how many football fans would die to have that chance… Peter King comes to mind immediately.
5. Brandon “Christopher” Lloyd is Kyle Orton’s muse. John Elway controls them via telepathy, obviously. Orton is a great Quarterback. I know you don’t believe me, but he is… I swear to God (John Elway).
6. Best five defenses fantasy wise this week – Lions, Raiders, Cardinals, Falcons and Bears. Do you see the pattern there? Yep, teams that have names ending in “s.” The Lions? No way.
7. Kicker Josh Scobee had 22 fantasy points this week. His shitty team, the Jacksonville Jags, scored 36 points in their win over the shittier Buffalo Bills. Did this guy kick 12 field goals? Seriously – I don’t know because I have a JVC flat panel TV with a special filter that doesn’t allow me to even see shitty football team’s highlights much less entire games.
8. Depending on how your league scores, Forehead Manning is the top fantasy earner this year so far. The guy is automatic and never the number one overall in the draft.
9. LT looks good, but he doesn’t look great. The same goes for Adrian Peterson and Chris Johnson.
10. Arian “Bananas” Foster is more exciting when Houston is winning. Matt “About to be Out of the” Schaub was better three games ago too.
11. Byes this week – Bills, Bengals, Cards and Panthers.
12. My picks – Do not assume the Titans will cover 5.5 at the Jags. I’ll take the Bucs easily over the Saints. And expect Houston to have huge rebound game against the Chiefs.
Shia LaBeouf Proves That He’s A Nice Guy By Throwing Coffee On An Innocent Photographer
Shia LaBeouf is allowed to throw coffee on anyone he wants because he’s a big-time Hollywood actor.
h/t Gavin
Reaction from the Twitterverse:
@BBWags: @FamousDC some days you can’t help but spill coffee on yourself; on the less clumsy days, Shia fills the void.
@jordanndavis He’s running from the decepticons just off-screen RT @FamousDC: Shia’s Starbucks 5K http://j.mp/ShiaCoffee #DC
@_mollify_ And running away like a little girl, this guy gets better & better. RT @FamousDC: Shia LaBeouf throwing coffee on ppl http://j.mp/ShiaCoffee
@MichaelTurk @FamousDC the best part of that is #shia running away like a little bitch. Love it.
@fedward Funny, that photographer looks nothing like Frankie Muniz.
@thisismarissa I could not dislike him more. RT @FamousDC: (VIDEO) Shia LaBeouf throws coffee on photographer in DC http://is.gd/g353d
@RyBitz @FamousDC Shia is a little Diva. Who pours coffee on a man and then RUNS?!? Have we recessed to elementary school?
Campaigning 101: How to Produce a Quality Negative Ad
“He kicks children in the face. Nice.”
h/t DA via TG
Christine Delargy Goes Behind the Scenes at the MTV Town Hall
CBS News’ Christine Delargy gets an exclusive behind-the-scenes look at President Obama’s hour-long youth town hall airing on MTV, BET and CMT Thursday afternoon. MTV’s Sway Calloway and BET’s April Woodard spoke with “Washington Unplugged” before the event about young voters and turnout in the midterm elections.
Judicial Watch Says Pelosi Feelin’ So Fly Like A G6…
Public interest group Judicial Watch details 85 trips by Speaker Nancy Pelosi using Air Force aircraft … with an over $100k liquor and food tab. [party in the sky]
Which gives us an excuse to turn off the lights, turn on the disco ball and smoke machine, and crank this song on a Thursday afternoon.
Congressional Blackberry Wars
Vote for Whitey
This is unfortunate, but a wee bit funny: [oh, boy]
The last name of Green Party gubernatorial candidate Rich Whitney is misspelled as “Whitey” on electronic-voting machines in nearly two dozen wards — about half in predominantly African-American areas — and election officials said Wednesday the problem cannot be corrected by Election Day.
Whitey, er, Whitney’s response:
“I don’t want to be identified as ‘Whitey.’ If this is happening in primarily African-American wards, that’s an even bigger concern,” Whitney told the Chicago Sun-Times. “I don’t know if this is machine politics at play or why this happened.”
Best of luck to Whitney.
h/t CP
Your WTF of the Week: If We’ve Said It Once…
Next time you decide to run for Congress, think real hard about the kind of things you might have done in your past…
Fark: Q: Hey Ohio Congressman Charlie Wilson (D-evastating Left Hook), have you stopped beating your wife yet? A: Yes, I stopped in 1990 (with court documents)
h/t Mark-train
Obama Blames POLITICO for Upcoming Midterm Elections
USA Today: Obama: 24/7 media makes it hard to focus ‘on the long term’
“I’ve been surprised by how the news cycle here in Washington is focused on what happens this minute, as opposed to what needs to happen over the course of months, years,” Obama told the crowd at George Washington University. “The 24-hour news cycle is just so lightning fast and the attention span I think is so short that sometimes it’s difficult to keep everybody focused on the long term.”
Famously Tweeted: Miners Are All Safe!
Line of the night:
@pourmecoffee: The last miner is now rescued. The only people left in mine are the brave rescuers and, for some reason, the Salahis.
Autobot Romance
Craigslist love knows no boundaries.
Autobot Romance – m4w (Downtown (11th & H))
You: About 7 feet tall, shiny aluminum with a waffle pattern. Being pulled around by some chump of a yellow van. I think it had a tattoo that said “District Taco”.
Me: About 13 foot 6 (32 feet tall when I mean business), chrome grille with flame paint job. Probably protecting that obnoxious kid from the fourth Indiana Jones movie and the rest of the free world. My given name is Optimus, but you can call me Prime, for short.
You smell sweet, like carnitas mixed with a little bit of pico de gallo and heaven. Thinking about you turns my Energon reactor into a two-stroke.
Come roll out with me – there’s more to me than meets the eye.
Freedom is the right of all sentient beings, and you shouldn’t have to deal with funny little men running around inside of you all day. If you want to meet me, I’m blending in with the Megabuses at 11th and H Street. Just remember, fate rarely calls upon us at a moment of our choosing.
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So … He Could Still Use a Little Polish [Alvin Greene]
The first question is amazing: “Are you a witch?”
The second question is just as good: Why was your high school nickname “Turtle?”
Third question: “Seriously, your nickname, where did that come from?”
Christine O’Donnell Channels her Inner Antoine Dodson
Pay attention to the end
HIDE YOUR WILL
HIDE YOUR LIGHTS
CAUSE HE’S TAXING EVERYTHING OUT HERE.
This also gives us another chance to watch Mr. Dodson’s original hit [31 million downloads]
Best Election Ad this Cycle
Chile Rejoices
Amazing…
Closing Bell: How Not To Make Friends With Al Gore
Spotted in Arlington.
First La Loma
… then the world
NY Daily News: Terror threat to restaurants as Al Qaeda calls for attacks on government workers in D.C.
