It's the end of the day and just when I think nothing will inspire me to laugh enough to post a blog entry I come across this little gem. Our friends at urlesque posted this just in the nick of time and also dug up a little bit of research and background on the creator of goat bagpipes.
The video perfectly describes how it feels in my head right now. I don't know what's real anymore.
First of all, I know you are astounded by my ability to Photoshop a pumpkin pie onto vanilla-chocolate layer cake. It's hard to believe I didn't go to school for graphic design, right?
My photo fun was inspired by a new dessert called "pumpple cake" which we just read about on The Frisky.
This baked Frankenstein amalgamation is the result of people always arguing over which is better--pie or cake?
Philadelphia's Flying Monkey Bakery in Reading Market Terminal has baked an apple pie and pumpkin pie into a vanilla and chocolate cake, fused with butter cream icing.
As you can imagine, we Americans being of strong constitution, are clearing these puppies off bakery shelves faster than they can be made.
Based on our finely tuned palettes, the pumpple cake, weighing in at 1,800 calories per slice would be perfect for dessert after you put away a BK Pizza Burger.
A high school student in Florida has been arrested after he allegedly held up two stores armed with a bottle of salad dressing.
Larry Franklin (pictured left)first held up a DeLand convenience store with his zesty weapon and actually got away with some money, say police.
Police arrested Franklin outside of the store and say that he intended to use the money to buy drugs and jewelry instead of a big tub of organic spring mix with radicchio.
It just came to our attention that Dumb as a Blog is not the only news source out there providing informed and timely coverage of all things idiotic. I mean, how could we be with so much stupidity raining down on us like hell fire every nano second?
Luckily our friends at tbs.com have picked up some of our slack. Their new web series Today's Riff hosted by Matt Arden rounds up a bunch 'o' dumb from the internet and beyond. Even better, truTV.com boasts our own special brand of brainless in a segment called "Dumm Stuff."
Cuddle up in your Snuggie and enjoy this clip.
Today is the day our pals at AskMen.com publish their list of the Top 49 Influential Men of 2010. First obvious question is why not 50? Would it be so hard to find one more dude who is important? When in doubt you could always add Barney Frank.
Secondly, the #1 most influential guy this year is... Jon Stewart.
For reals.
Spots eleven and twelve are taken by Stephen Colbert and Conan O'Brien. With three comedians among the most influential dudes of the year, should we really take this list seriously? Those guys made a bigger impact on the world than people who wrote policy or ran the Earth's biggest corporations? And the Man Men creator is in the top 20 but Kim Jong Il is not. No doubt Il is watching Lake Placid 3 on Netflix while surfing the web. This diss? Might make him press the big red button.
I'm guessing the full list puts Kevin Nealon at #48 and Obama at #49. Lopez was probably bumped for Conan and Jimmy Fallon didn't even make the cut because he's the only one who has a bunch of chick comedy writers so thay probably think he's a puss -- er, a ladyflower. Private to Fallon: I <3 you! Hire me!
And let's not forget that 2010 is not over. Maybe Eddie Izzard will help stem the cholera epidemic before Christmas.
Then again, 2010 was hard. Maybe we needed comedy more than ever and maybe these suit-clad television talk show hosts caused world economies not to tank, helped us feed the poor and allowed us to inch our way back to sanity and hope.
It's possible. Or maybe it's possible AskMen.com needs to put the cap back on the glue.
See the full list here: Top 49 Most Influential Men of 2010
Related: In case you missed it, my desperate desperate traffic grab photo gallery was titled Top 22 Dumbest Dudes of 2010 (So Far). You will dig it so much I will surely be voted one of the top #5478 most influential blogger gals with naturally curly hair of 2010.
It's terrible to be on the receiving end of crappy Halloween candy.
An apple or fake wax vampire teeth were my least favorite treats I recall having dumped into my paisley pillow case but there were and are some truly offensive confections still circulating around on this dastardly day.
To help understand the hierarchy of Halloween candy, Boing Boing has posted a lovely chart detailing just what qualifies as class vs. trash when you are running from home to home begging for treats.
Not surprisingly a Twix is at the top of the list, while there's a special place in hell reserved for folks who dole out Bottle Caps and Brach's Candy.
Tell us your favorite/least favorite Halloween candy, boys and ghouls.
Rand and Evi Quaid are back in the news as dumb criminals once again.
But these dumb criminals are quickly turning into bizarre, paranoid, above the law criminals thanks in part to their celebrity status.
Failing to show up for their court date after being charged with allegedly skipping out on a $10,000 hotel bill and also squatting in and vandalizing property they once owned, the Quaids fled to Canada.
Randy and Evi were arrested in Vancouver and released after posting bail.
They seek asylum in Canada and their reason for fleeing is nuttier than a squirrel turd. The Quaids claim that a group called "star whackers" are going to kill them and are also responsible for the deaths of Heath Ledger and David Carradine. Their whereabouts are currently unknown and their lawyer insists they must hide for their own safety.
We hope their lawyer knows he's not going to see a dime from these two.
A Michigan man is attempting a Guinness World Record while also raising money for charity by seeing how many Madagascar hissing cockroaches he can hold in his mouth at once.
The previous record for holding cockroaches in your mouth (which I can't believe exists) was 6 cockroaches for 10 seconds. Sean Murphy doesn't even bat an eye at doubling that number to set a new record.
It's unclear how Murphy came to figure out that he possessed this unique "skill" but the proceeds will go to fund a new river outlook that will help educate classes at the Harris Nature Center in Lansing and Murphy will come out of this a record holder.
I for one will donate money to never see someone put a cockroach in their mouth again.
This video is way scarier than Saw.
A 26-year old government employee in London admitted last week to calling in several bomb threats on his workplace, court documents say. So why did Andre Lake admit to hatching this foul plot? Was he a terrorist, hell-bent on pressing his radical agenda on an unsuspecting populace? Or did he just want to go home and smoke some weed?
If you're a regular reader of this blog, I think you know the answer to that one.
Lake told prosecutors that he didn't have any vacation leave remaining, didn't like his job, and on top of it, had a monthly marijuana habit that added up to over $300 a month. Unfortunately for him, he called in the bomb threats from inside the building, on floors that are only accessible by swiping a government-issued security card. The only person who swept his card at the times the calls were made was Mr Lake.
When he was arrested, Lake told the arresting officer that he was "foolish and stupid." A court will decide his punishment later this year, and in case you're reading this, Dre, here's some free advice: When you show up for your sentencing hearing, don't bring your weed to court.
Our last winning loser was Xavier Ross, the young man who was wanted on a felony burlary charge and nabbed for allegedly playing a piano outside a police station for hours. Good job, all!
Now, we've a new crop of crazy dumb criminal stories. Review and then click to help us pick the very stupidest one.
MONDAY: To have and to hold up: Woman robs husband say police
TUESDAY: Trash bag clad 'robber' doesn't make it back to escape wheelchair
WEDNESDAY: Did blonde bombshell plant an actual bomb in ex-boyfriend's car?
THURSDAY: Jury says criminal dreamed up sleepwalking defense
FRIDAY: Suspect returns to crime scene to bum cigarette, say cops
Poll is open for one wek only, so get to it!
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