Try not to get uncomfortable watching this October 11, 2010 1:04 PM | permalink

It is definitely getting close to Halloween and this video should make the hair on the back of your neck stand up.  

Paula Deen and her recipes= creepy

Paula Deen and friend eating a doughnut bacon burger and having food orgasms= creepier

All of this slowed down=pure terror

[the daily what]

Prostitute who turns out to be a cop is not: Cops October 8, 2010 10:45 AM | permalink

Misty Dawn McNeal, pictured, was selling her body but when a John took the bait, she slammed him up against a wall, showed him a police badge and frisked him, according to cops in Lee County, FL.

McNeal, 34, allegedly ordered the man not to move and then nearly made off with $400 from his wallet... which is not something a officer would normally do, of course, because the thing is -- police say this would-be hooker hooked a willing customer and then she switched it up and pretended to be a cop to rob the guy.

Of course, the tiniest violin award goes out to this victim, who shouldn't have been doing what he was doing anyway.

Related: In March of 2010, Misty (seen right in another police gamour shot) was reported missing.  Well, no doubt, now she's found.

 

Gal goes 200 mi. to murder guy who dissed her on web: Cops October 1, 2010 2:38 PM | permalink

Breana Greathouse (pictured) may be crazy, but she also may make dudes think twice about saying mean things about women on the web, if allegations are true that she drove 200 miles to kill a man for saying hurtful things online .

Greathouse, 25, journeyed from Kansas City, MO to Ottumwa, IA. Cops say they found her with a gun in her hand, intent on shooting a man because she thought he "made derogatory postings about her on the internet."

Apple falling near the tree? Greathouse's mom Susan, 50, is also accused of harassing the same man via phone.

Greathouse is currently being held at the Wapello County Jail.  Which, since we're writing about her, is a good thing.  Private to Breana: You're awesome!  Don''t shoot!

What do you think: Is Breana here a candidate to become Dumbest Dame of 2010?

Full 411 on the story here.

Taylor Momsen still alive September 21, 2010 2:19 PM | permalink

I was combing headlines and saw the words "Taylor Momsen", "catches fire" and "die" all in one sentence.

I got really excited but it turns out the little devil spawn did not spontaneously combust.

Instead, the 17-year-old has a new music video out for her song "Make Me Wanna Die" in which she gets down to just undergarments (uh, isn't that what she wears for clothing anyway?) and catches fire.

Sigh.

All special effects, people--except for the wraith-like, zombie make-up. Taylor did that herself.

If you want to pretend she really did catch fire, then check out her video on The Frisky.

Mom leaves baby after taking merchandise, say cops September 17, 2010 12:49 PM | permalink

Janita Moreau stole from a Walmart with her two children, 11 and 13, tagging along, according to cops in North Lauderdale, FL.

The trio was allegedly loading the hot stuff into a diaper bag and a stroller (which also contained Moreau's six-month-old baby) and made for the exits.  When confronted by security, they decided to run back into the store to hide, but the babe was left behind, according to a police report.

No idea where they thought they wouldn't be found.  Behind the non-stick cookware?  Under a stack of polyester thongs?  Any bright ideas, let us know in the comments.

Moreau was charged with petty theft and neglect without great harm.

Story here.

Judge Judy at half speed doubles your entertainment dollar September 16, 2010 12:07 PM | permalink

Under normal conditions,I would never subject you to a Judge Judy video that is over 5 minutes long. While technically, I suppose it is that long, that is only because the mad genius who made this video took a particularly cringe-inducing 2 minutes of Judge Judy, and slowed it down to half speed, making everyone in the video sound like that are horribly slurring drunks, which I cannot say with certainty they are not.What I can say with certainty is, is this is hilarious.

Enjoy.

Judge Judy At Half Speed: The Toilet:

RELATED: "Are Your Kittens Still Alive?" Comedian Dan Cronin's Judge Judy Remix

h/t Street Carnage

DUI suspect prefers catwalk to perp walk? September 16, 2010 9:49 AM | permalink

During her field sobriety test last Thursday, 38-year-old Sheryl A. Urzedowski offered to do a gymnastics move for cops before really strutting her stuff, performing a hand-on-hips model walk, according to police in Orland Park, IL.

She was charged with driving under the influence of alcohol, disregarding a traffic control device, driving 26-30 mph over the posted speed limit, following too close to another vehicle and improper lane usage. 

Oh, and to kick the dumb up a notch, she allegedly wanted the officer to read her "the Amanda rights." 

Story here.

FYI: That's not her in the picture. But we wish it was.

J-Lo flick fosters flamingly jealous felonious rampage? September 8, 2010 11:18 AM | permalink

A Jennifer Lopez movie made a woman so angry with her husband that she attempted to set his go-kart and jacuzzi on fire and threatened to put his dogs to sleep, according to police in Milton, FL.

The altercation allegedly began when Shannon Wriska, pictured, became extremely jealous of J-Lo and did not want her husband Robert watching a movie starring the actress.

Reports say that the next day Mrs. Wriska, 34, walked outside of their trailer and tried to set the motor on her love's go-kart ablaze, attempted to torch his boat, filled the jacuzzi with gasoline, punched him in the face and then drove off with his dogs saying she was going to "put them to sleep."

Funny enough, that is exactly how I felt after I saw Gigli for the first time.

Wriska was arrested and charged with first degree battery, arson and a second degree felony.

Happy 90210 day, idiots! September 2, 2010 11:50 AM | permalink

Hey, morons!

We know you're out there, we write about you every day.

So you know how today is September 2nd, 2010? Well it is. That makes the date 9/02/10, or 90210, just like the Beverly Hills zip code and vapid high school soap opera that bears its name!

Hooray!

Now lets all celebrate by attending High School even though we're obviously in our 30's!

Wife breaks balls with crowbar say cops September 1, 2010 11:32 AM | permalink

An enraged woman clobbered her husband's crotch with a crow bar yesterday, according to police in Stroudsburg, PA

Dale Morris, 61, allegedly went balls out on her husband's junk after reading a note he left behind that irked her.

We can't imagine what you write on a note to inspire that kind of fury but let's try a few:

"Hey hon, I drained our savings account to fund a new sex toy I created---going to the U.S. Patent Office--back in a few"

"Dale-- I am leaving you for your sister's husband. Sorry it had to be this way but Gary is more of a woman than you'll ever be. Oh, I will be back later to pick up my Snuggie and everything else I couldn't fit into the Festiva."

"Went to the gym to buy you a membership, porky."

Morris did not simmer down while waiting for him to return home and went to town on his package like a pinata full of hundred dollar bills.

She also hit him in the head but that's not as funny.

Morris has been charged with aggravated assault and wreckless endangerment.