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Pokemon Ranch Channel reveal doesn't actually reveal anything

The above clip is direct footage from Nintendo's press event yesterday when they dropped all sorts of bombs regarding hedgehogs, motorcycles and most importantly Pokémon-flavored brand synergy.

While the footage doesn't really tell us anything -- assuming my audience, like myself, has no ability to speak Japanese -- those pictures of ambling Pokémon and giddy Miis certainly excite every part of me that has ever believed in the power of downloadable content. Sure, Puzzle Quest has been fun, and Everyday Shooter is intriguing, but without a meandering Buneary nearby, it's apparent that everything that has come before has all been in preparation for Nintendo's Pokémon Ranch Channel.

... whatever the hell that might be.

[Propers to GoldenDonut] 

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Gamecock: They give men breasts and crap bombs of beauty

Destructoid loves the Gamecock -- and how could we not love them? We're very similar in a lot of ways you know. Gamecock and Destructoid both share awesome mascots, we both believe strongly in the indie, we're both insane as hell and we both have very hardcore fans. 

Take the case of these two fan made videos promoting Gamecock. The creator of the videos was so inspired by everything Gamecock stood for, he just had to make something for them. The result is something that is quite beautiful in a very demented way.

The first video is called Develop and is described as:

 For "Develop" my original tagline was something like, “Gamecock, the Short and Curlies of Your Second Puberty”. Point being, we all have the potential to grow. Gamecock, (by virtue of its own existence) just shoots some lightning up your butt to make it happen. Look at me. Before Gamecock inspired me, I kept my imagination to myself. Now the entire www must share my curse.

Hit the jump to check out Choose Life and a little diary from the creator on the back story on these awesome videos.

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The more you know: Gamecock HAHA Weird! Indie
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Video Games Live coming to a venue near you (unless you happen to be me)

Video Games Live coming to a venue near you (unless you happen to be me) photo

Ever since we were privy to the spectacle that is Video Games Live at this year's Game Developer's Conference, I've been dying to see it again, so when a press release from co-creator Tommy Tallarico hit the Destructobox earlier today claiming 25 new concerts around the world had been announced, I screamed the scream of the pleased! Then, after having read the release and realizing none of the shows happen to occur in Portland, Oregon, I screamed the scream of the dismayed and woke up my dog.

To quote the Press Release, here's the list of upcoming shows:

Buffalo, NY - October 14, 2007 - Kleinhans Music Hall - Buffalo Philharmonic
Los Angeles, CA - October 19, 2007 - Nokia Theatre - E for All Expo
London, England - October 22, 2007 - Royal Festival Hall - London Games Festival
Columbia, MO - October 28, 2007 - Jessie Auditorium - University of Missouri
Calgary, Canada - November 9, 2007 - Jack Singer Hall - Calgary Philharmonic
Calgary, Canada - November 10, 2007 - Jack Singer Hall - Calgary Philharmonic
Orlando, FL - January TBA, 2008 - TBA - Otronicon
St. Louis, MO - January 26, 2008 - Fox Theater -
FT. Wayne, IN - February 15, 2008 - Embassy Theatre - Ft. Wayne Phil
Milwaukee, WI - March 1, 2008 - Riverside Theater - Milwaukee Symphony
Phoenix, AZ - March 7, 2008 - Maricopa Center - Phoenix Symphony
Ogden, UT - March 27, 2008 - Browning Arts Center - Utah Symphony
Salt Lake City, UT - March 28, 2008 - Abravanel Hall - Utah Symphony
Salt Lake City, UT - March 29, 2008 - Abravanel Hall - Utah Symphony
Austin, TX - July 11, 2008 - Long Center
Austin, TX - July 12, 2008 - Long Center

So, Ogden, Utah gets a show, and somehow I don't? I knew the Mormons had pull, but short of strong-arm tactics by Zombie Joseph Smith, I'm baffled by this apparent coup.

Hit the jump for the Release in its entirety. 

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Gryphons, werewolves, minotaurs a serious issue: New Legendary: The Box images

Gryphons, werewolves, minotaurs a serious issue: New Legendary: The Box images photo

There are many reasons why I'm not a thief, the least of which is that I might accidentally steal the wrong thing, thus unleashing hordes of monsters upon modern civilization. How would I explain that to my wife?

That's exactly what happens in Spark Unlimited's first-person shooter, Legendary: The Box. A thief steals an ancient artifact, and unwittingly starts a war between mythical creatures and mankind. Before you know it, minotaurs are taking all of our best jobs, we're cleaning gryphon droppings off of our windshields before we go to work, and our significant others are cheating on us with werewolves before getting torn limb from limb. It's a bad scene, man.

The Gamecock published Legendary: The Box is set to hit the PC, PlayStation 3, and Xbox 360 in Spring 2008. There's still time to gryphonize your cars.

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The more you know: BERJAYAFPS Gamecock BERJAYAPC BERJAYAxbox 360
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Hitman movie censored already?

Hitman movie censored already?  photo

The inner workings of the minds of Hollywood's executives often make very little sense. That's as true a statement as saying that the sky is blue or that Snowboard Kids is better than Mario Kart 64. The modern Hollywood exec ideology that confuses me the most though is what seems to be a total inability to understand the audience that certain movies are made for, along with their obsession with the idea that the lower the age rating a movie recieves, the bigger the audience it will get by default. 

"We've got Aliens Vs. Predator coming up? PG-13 please! The fans of the old movies will just love that, and just think of all the ten year olds who've never even heard of Ripley we'll draw in! And we're doing Die Hard 4? Great! Let's make sure it's a worthy successor to the series everyone loves by cutting the violence right down and making sure Bruce barely says "f*ck". That's bound to pull in millions of kids to watch a bald middle-aged guy they barely recognize!" For all their talk of demographics they often seem to have no clue whatsoever who they're making movies for. 

The latest movie to be castrated into oblivion, if "insider reports" turn out to be true, is the upcoming feature based on IO's Hitman series. After some really promising reports regarding the quality of the script, which apparently takes a very hard-edged and thematically mature approach to the game's adaptation, word has filtered through that Fox has taken control of the final cut from director Xavier Gans and put Die Hard 4.0 editor Nicholas De Toth in control of creating a new, bloodless edit. 

If this turns out to be true, then we've got a minor tragedy on our hands. With gaming getting closer and closer to gaining the respect it deserves as a mainstream medium, and Christophe Gans' Silent Hill finally bringing a largely successful adaptation of one of videogames' finest to a wider audience, a good quality Hitman movie looked set to springboard off into a hopeful new era of legitimate games movies. If Hollywood has pulled a, well, Hollywood again, then we've instead probably got another crappy kids' film that will be ignored by the general public and spurned by its intended gamer audience. Come on guys, let's compare and contrast. Streetfighter Vs. Silent Hill. Which movie actually made the most of its franchise's strengths and which turned out best? Coincidence? 

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Retail display confirms forthcoming Xbox 360 Arcade bundle

Retail display confirms forthcoming Xbox 360 Arcade bundle photo

Yay! More SKUs!

GameSpot has obtained images of a retail display that has confirmed the existence of the rumored "Xbox 360 Arcade" bundle. The display confirms what was previously rumored: The system will come bundled with a wireless controller, a 256MB memory card, and five arcade games. While the display doesn't list the Arcade games included, the rumors have suggested Boom-Boom Rocket, Uno, Feeding Frenzy, Luxor 2, and Pac-Man. The rumors have been true so far, so why question them now?

A price is also not listed, but the system is expected to retail for the same as the current "Core" system, which is currently $279.99. Microsoft refused to comment to GameSpot about the article, but what more is there to say, really?

[Thanks, Justin!]

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EA annonces E for All line up, includes Rock Band, Rock Band, and Rock Band

Haven't made up your mind about whether or not you'll be attending this year's E For All? It's only a week away, you don't have much time to decide. What, playable Super Smash Bros. Brawl isn't going to do it for you?

Well perhaps Electronic Arts has what you need -- how does getting some hands on time with Rock Band sound? I'll tell you how it sounds, damn it -- it sounds great! Other titles on hands that are not Rock Band (and therefore, will be ignored) include:

The Simpsons Game; Warhammer Online; Smarty Pants; The Orange Box: Team Fortress; Medal of Honor: Airborne; Medal of Honor: Heroes 2; NFL Tour; and the ambiguous "EA Mobile."  

I know a handful of the Destructoid staff will be out there for the event -- who's in?

The more you know: Electronic Arts Rock Band
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Dead Fantasy 1: From the guy who did Haloid. Also, CHICK FIGHT!

A few months ago, a video was released called Haloid that brought together Halo and Metroid into an all out battle to the death. Today, montyoum is back with his latest epic masterpiece called Dead Fantasy 1. 

Dead Fantasy 1 mashes up the Final Fantasy universe with the Dead or Alive universe. The movie starts off with Yuna running away from Kasumi and Ayane until they finally catch up to Yuna and start battling it out. Rikku comes in soon after and everything is looking good for the Final Fantasy girls until Hitomi jumps into the fight to back up Kasumi and Ayane. Yuna and Rikku also get another girl to fight along side of them, but it's not who you expect it to be ...

You'll notice a few things about this video compared to Haloid. First, the characters look a hell of a lot better animation and character design wise. Second, yes, more Matrix music is used (Is that so bad though?). Third, this is only part 1 and no telling when part two will come out. Montyoum is saying that part 2 will be far greater than this so we'll just have to sit and wait for the next part. Until then, enjoy this awesome video. 

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Wideload Shorts announces first title for upcoming web-based videogame network

Wideload Shorts announces first title for upcoming web-based videogame network photo

Wideload Shorts (the "small games" division of Stubbs The Zombie developer Wideload Games), has announced that they will be providing the first title for InstantAction.com, an upcoming web-based videogame network.

The Wideload Shorts developed Cyclomite is (unfortunately) not a sequel to Gyromite, but has players piloting a "Cyclomite" through meteor storms. Players control a multicolored "Cyclomite" ring in the center of the screen, using it to catch meteors as they fly towards the center of the storm. The game will also include two multiplayer modes, including co-op levels and a competitive mode. 

The game will make its premiere at the Independent Games Concference in Eugene, Oregeon, where Wideload founder Alex Seropian will be the keynote speaker. Instant Action launches this January.

The more you know: BERJAYAPC Wideload Games
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New Dtoid Contest: Steal a Wii from Goozex

Epic Games has pretty offices, nice cars

Mario Kart Wii in action: You can do Tony Hawk-like flips now

How to do it right: Assassin's Creed Collector's Edition

Final Oblivion DLC content, Fighter's Stronghold, to hit PC/360 next week


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