SO DID YOU DREAM OF AN EGGPLANT OR WHAT?

Even better, you dreamed of a hawk; or if you had the best dream of all you dreamed of Mt. Fuji. No? Well at the very least, some tobacco or maybe a blind acupressurist?

According to the tradition of hatsuyume, the first dream you have in the new year is auspicious, and tradition covers some pret-ty weird corners of the old racial memory, as we all know. Probably the weirdest corners we all know. But tobacco or a blind acupressurist? Who could combine those things, let alone as sequentially auspicious, but tradition?

So here's to tradition for the new year. We could sure use more of it, by the look of the leftovers from last year. BTW, any traditionalists know if chocolate ice cream in a highly foreign country is anywhere on that list?

SIMPLE VEGETARIAN RECIPES


Thinly Sliced Tomatoes

Ingredients: tomatoes
Slice thinly.
Stare at slices until satisfied.

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Onions comme ça

Ingredients: onions
Do whatever you want,
they're your onions.

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Fresh Green Beans

Ingredients: green beans, fresh.
Serve while fresh.
Discard immediately.

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Carrots aux Terre

Ingredients: carrots
Pull carrots from ground;
eat with dirt still on.

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Green Peppers In Situ

Ingredients: green peppers
Kneel on ground;
eat peppers from plant.

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Okra a la Gravité

Ingredients: okra plant
Lie on ground beneath plant
until desired okra pod falls into open mouth.
Change position for additional servings.

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Corn on the Cob

Ingredients: corn; cobs
Just make sure the corn stays on the cob.
Nothing more is required of you.

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Aubergines a la Idée Fixe

Ingredients: none
Think of nothing but eggplants.

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Zucchini sans souci

Ingredients: none
Don't even think about it.

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