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Showing posts with label 1965. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 1965. Show all posts

Thursday, June 8, 2017

Paperback 995: Take Me In Passion / Donna Richards (Domino Books 72-929)

Paperback 995: Domino Books 72-929 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Take Me In Passion
Author: Donna Richards
Cover artist: photo cover

Condition: 7/10
Estimated value: $15-20

[new addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Domino72-929
Best things about this cover:
  • It was a weird time for metal.
  • Opium Addicts Surreptitiously Admire Each Other's Bras
  • "Like the wig? It's Bowie's." "Really!?" "No, I found it in a dumpster."
  • "Maybe we should've gone with a professional stylist...?" "Shhh ... the panther ... he sees us ..." (seriously, what is that shadow?)
  • They had to re-release this book after the original title, Take Me In Indifference, failed to move buyers.
  • Love how the "Adult Reading" notice looks much more like "Exciting Feature!" than "Warning!"

Domino72-929bc
Best things about this back cover:
  • "They had to choose ... but could they?" Look, make up your mind. Those sad shirtless lesbians either had agency or they didn't.
  • No, *you're* the passion's puppet! No puppet, no puppet! (dear future, this is a reference to a 2016 political moment that's probably best forgotten, I'm sorry)
  • Wow, it gets unexpectedly Homeric there at the end, with "foreordained" this and "all-powerful, erotic destiny" that. The gods do love laughing at havoc.

Page 123~

Marty Green waggled his forefinger before the boy's nose. "No . . . you . . . don't! What do you think I am, like that broad I'm looking for? You think I'm queer like her? Well, she's not even my own daughter, what do you think of that? I adopted her, like a damn fool. Imagine? I adopted a queer!"

I know a lot is happening in this paragraph, but I'm kinda still stuck on "waggled."

~RP

P.S. bonus material from p. 123:

"You're drinking nothing! What the hell do you think I am, some kind of a hick? I'm Marty Green!"

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Thursday, June 9, 2016

Paperback 948: Sin-Drome / Arthur A. Howe (Vega V-46)

Paperback 948: Vega Books V-46 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Sin-Drome
Author: Arthur A. Howe
Cover artist: that guy who did so many Vega / Fabian / Saber Books covers...

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Estimated value: $15-20
Condition: 6/10

Vega46
Best things about this cover:
  • More awkward couch-posing. Great.
  • More awkward "Sin"-punning. Great.
  • Is "Dyserotic" a word?
  • Ew, his right hand. Imagine that touching you. Ew.
  • Suburban Insurance Salesman Vampires prefer the upper boob.
  • LOL at the discreetly bolded "other"

Vega46bc
Best things about this back cover:
  • "The gun was the weapon which decided the balance of power in this situation." So sayeth SleazeNovelBot 5000.
  • Man, this is the worst. It's like every sub-"Walker Texas Ranger" crime show where the killer / bad guy decides to delay and orate just long enough for the hero to come along with a roundhouse.
  • I gotta say, the sexual sadism of the last part is kind of a new twist, though.
  • Speaking of sadism, I shudder to think what previous owners have done to this book. Are those cigarette burns?

Page 123~

"Oh God! He's dangerous, Juelle. If he catches on there's no telling what he'll do."

Don't be cruelle, Juelle, you fooelle.

~RP

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Friday, December 5, 2014

Paperback 840: Not I, Said the Vixen / Bill S. Ballinger (Gold Medal k1529)

Paperback 840: Gold Medal k1529 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Not I, Said the Vixen
Author: Bill S. Ballinger
Cover artist: [Bill Johnson]

Estimated value: $8-12

Donation to the collection from Mr. John Q. Brooklyn (I don't want to use real names w/o permission). Guy asks me "Can I send you a book for your blog?" Twist my arm!

GM1529

Best things about this cover:

  • "Isn't it true that your favorite letter is "I", Miss Lorents? ANSWER THE QUESTION!"
  • "Do you deny that you are overwhelmingly sensual? DO YOU!?"
  • This is a "vixen"? This looks like someone who showed up to a table reading for her role as "Vixen" in an episode of "Perry Mason." She does have a pretty boss head-tilt, but my prescription for greater vixenitude is less clothes, more gun. And … yeah, sure, go ahead and put on the glasses. OK, now shoot the D.A. and then stand over his body like, "told ya."


GM1529bc

Best things about this back cover:

  • Way to bury the lede, Gold Medal. How is PROWLED THE WORLD OF TWILIGHT WOMEN not on the cover!?
  • She "ruined her lovers with the hot breath of scandal" ("scandal" being a last-minute substitute for "chili cheese fries")
  • "Please state your name for the record." "Ivy Lorents." "And how do you spell 'Ivy,' Miss Lorents? I presume it starts 'I', 'V'…" "Not I." "Objection! Permission to treat the vixen as sensual, your honor."


Page 123~

"You had her … falling all over herself," Ivy said, pleased with the memory of Pauline's discomfort.

Please invest that sentence with all the Sapphic innuendo you can muster.

~RP

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Friday, November 14, 2014

Paperback 831: April Evil / John D. MacDonald (Gold Medal d1579)

Paperback 831: Gold Medal d1579 (1st thus, 1965)

Title: April Evil
Author: John D. MacDonald
Cover artist: Bill Johnson

Estimated value: $10-$15

GM1579

Best things about this cover:

  • The hot new book that finally answers the question: How many trenchcoated, fedoraed detectives does it take to find a lost contact lens?
  • You know what they say: April Evil brings May Bondage.
  • After looking at this picture, I wonder if it's not the "hold-up gang" that's "sleepy."
  • This is a fine, if weird, painting. Good use of small canvas. Her simple white top and blue skirt, surrounded by the lurking, drab frames of generic menace, make her really pop off the page.


GM1579bc

Best things about this back cover:

  • Ugh.
  • Don't you hate it when women choose the easy sluttish rut? Challenge yourselves, ladies!
  • How can you be "going to flab" while "losing something in the guts department"? Writing 101: don't let your stupid metaphors cancel each other out.


Page 123~

She smiled, and she felt cat-agile, rabbit-soft, mare-ready.

This was a vast improvement from a half hour earlier, when she had felt dog-tired, armadillo-hard, and lemur-unprepared.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Paperback 751: The Oddballs / Stacey Clubb (Softcover Library B853X)

Paperback 751: Softcover Library B853X (PBO, 1965)

Title: The Oddballs
Author: Stacey Clubb
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: Not For Sale—part of the Doug Peterson Collection

SoftCover853

Best things about this cover:
  • "I don't think they're so odd," he said, self-consciously.
  • So many questions. Such as, where has her right arm got to? Or, why their bed is a parallelogram?
  • Remember the fad of wearing two differently colored stockings!? Me either.
  • "You awake? … tickle tickle! … alright then, I'm just going to remove your head with my jaws now, OK? Just relax."
  • "The only practical sex was unnatural sex!" — Having trouble understanding the use of the word "practical" here. "Well, see, I would just put my penis in your vagina, but … it's really not practical for me ... right now … at this juncture … you know? So, let's just bring in the elephant and the mustard and see how it goes, mkay? It's just easier that way."

SoftCover853bc

Best things about this back cover:
  • Shadowy = Lesbiany. In case you're unfamiliar with paperback code.
  • INA, ha ha! Calling all crossword constructors, we got a live one!
  • I want a business card that reads "Encourager of odd rites and practices."

Page 123~

The sting of his blow had not penetrated.

Nope, sorry, that was just the first thing I opened to. Hang on … OK, here we go:

"Bernice," he called out.

But the bikini-clad goddess who appeared casually at the top of the mezzanine stairs in response to his blithe summons was not, of course, Bernice.

If ever there was a name custom-made for softcore porn, that name is Blithe Summons.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Sunday, November 10, 2013

Paperback 720: That Kind of Girl / Stanley Curson (Brandon House 741)

Paperback 720: Brandon House 741 (PBO, 1965)

Title: That Kind of Girl
Author: Stanley Curson
Cover artist: [Fred Fixler]

Yours for: $35

BH741

Best things about this cover:
  • Which kind of girl? Prematurely gray? Exceedingly tanned? Vinyl-loving? Shoe-collecting?
  • Seriously, those shoes, in all their green-ness and out-of-context-ness, totally make this cover.
  • V is for Vortex Of Forbidden Love 
  • I like that Ms. Gray is making a big "V" with her arms. Why she's covering her crotch with jazz hands, I don't know.

BH741bc

Best things about this back cover:

  • The pic itself is kind of adorable.  Hey! Lurid text! Leave those kids alone!

Page 123~

Anne gripped his organ experimentally …

OK, I cheated. This is page 122. But what was I supposed to do? Ignore this sentence? I throw myself on the mercy of the court.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Friday, October 4, 2013

Paperback 704: Harlem Underground / Ed Lacy (Pyramid R-1220)

Paperback 704: Pyramid R-1220 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Harlem Underground
Author: Ed Lacy
Cover artist: Harry Schaare

Yours for: $13

PyrR1220

Best things about this cover:
  • Sleeper hold!
  • Interesting variation on the noir street scene. You got your bar and your rain-slicked streets (or so I imagine), but apparently in Harlem there are brown/purple overtones, sliced through with neon red. Interesting effect.
  • Not one but *two* floating heads. Highly unusual.
  • I like how the big floating head appears to be looking down on some earlier version of himself, going "Damn, did I do that? That's cold."
  • You can see Schaare's signature right under the big head's right eye. Unless that says "Espresso." It's pretty smudgy.

PyrR1220bc

Best things about this back cover:
  • Wait, *I*'m a rookie cop? But I already have ... OK, fuck it, sure, I'm in.
  • As street names go, "Purple Eye" seems kind of limp.
  • There's something quaint about how much terror the word "H-Bomb" apparently packed in 1965. Also, do H-Bombs have fuses? Serious question.

Page 123~

Breathing deeply I not only wanted to get out of Harlem, I wanted to take a rocket away from our mixed-up planet. 

Again with the cold war / space race fantasies. This book is adorable.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Sunday, July 14, 2013

Paperback 672: The Jugger / Richard Stark (aka Donald Westlake) (Pocket Books 50149)

Paperback 672: Pocket Books 50149 (PBO, 1965)

Title: The Jugger
Author: Richard Stark (Donald Westlake)
Cover artist: Harry Bennett

Yours for: Not For Sale (part of the "Parker PBO" collection)

PB50149

Best things about this cover:
  • A bizarre constellation of color. Bit too much white space, but I kind of enjoy almost abstract feel to this one. Say what you will about Harry Bennet—he had a Style.
  • Dude in foreground is ominous. Nice isolation of the billy club. Guy reminds me of any number of corrupt Jim Thompson sheriffs (a redundant phrase, I realize).
  • This is another of my Powell's purchases. Paid too much for this one. Don't care. Must. Have. All. Parkers.

PB50149bc

Best things about this back cover:
  • It think my main objection to this era of Pocket Books is the ghastly base color of the spine (and, here, back cover). Pure puke.
  • That "art" is useless.
  • "Tiftus" is a fantastic name.
  • "...the eyes of a pickpocket and the mouth of a whore." Dang. Vivid.

Page 123~ (actually p. 23, as p. 123 disappears between chapters)

Damn Tiftus! He kept talking all the time, talking as though he knew exactly what he was talking about, but he never said anything. Jabber jabber jabber, and nothing coming out.

Stark does great third-person subjective. Man, I gotta get back into this series. I took a break to read Gaiman and Questlove, and Aslan's Jesus bio comes out Tuesday ... stop writing for a second, people! I need to catch up.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Paperback 646: People vs. Withers & Malone / Stuart Palmer & Craig Rice (Award Books A146F)

Paperback 646: Award Books A146F (1st ptg, 1965)

TitlePeople vs. Withers & Malone
Author: Craig Rice & Stuart Palmer
Cover artist: Uncredited / Clip art?

Yours for: $5

AwardA146F

Best things about this cover:
  • Craig Rice and Stuart Palmer document their early experiments with sexual role-playing games. "Wait, I forget, am I 'Withers' or 'Malone' in this scenario?" Speaking of role-playing, "Craig Rice" is male-sounding pseudonym for female author Georgiana Ann Craig. I own a nice copy of a book she ghost-wrote for actor George Sanders. (Here's a nice write-up about Rice at "Pulp Serenade")
  • Or maybe the parrot is 'Withers' and the cougar is 'Malone', in which case I am hoping for a break-out and then serious carnage. Malone can do the killing, while Withers provides narration. "[Squawk!], he's got your eyeball! Got your eyeball! [Squawk!]"
  • I hope the artist got paid the $0.75 he was owed for this "painting."
  • I keep looking at this book and seeing "An Insane Rectum Mystery."

AwardA146Fbc

Best things about this back cover:
  • God, paperback book design just went to $^#%ing hell in the mid-'60s. Not in all instances, but in many. See virtually every Travis McGee novel. So much potential, so much ugh.
  • I love that Artzybasheff is someone's name. Some *artist's* name.
  • I love that "Ellery Queen" (itself a pseudonym) refers to the mid-'60s as "these unfunny days." I can only guess what he means, but I love an author who believes his own time has gone to hell. Also, from a crime novel / crime movie perspective, the mid-60s were (with some very notable exceptions [cough] Parker [cough]) pretty dire.

Page 123~

"Blue sea!" cried Malone. "I told her her eyes were as blue as the sea! That was Luke Swenson's sister, Little Helga, a queen-size Viking goddess! I am in love with her, practically!"

"Practically!" So few people exclaim their hedge words! Nice.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Thursday, May 16, 2013

Paperback 641: The Blue Kimono Kill / Walt Sheldon (Gold Medal k1546)

Paperback 641: Gold Medal k1546 (PBO, 1965)

Title: The Blue Kimono Kill
Author: Walt Sheldon
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: $15

GMk1546

Best thing about this cover:
  • "Honey, we need to talk. Don't be made but ... it's about your lipstick."
  • Mmm, chick-flavored.
  • And the winner of this cover is: The Lantern.

GMk1546bc

Best things about this back cover:
  • God save me from a text-only back cover, ugh.
  • "But Marlin's academic career didn't last long. For, you see, Marlin was a fish."
  • Adjective of the Day: "Zen-spouting."

Page 123~

"You strike me as a man who could be brave, Marlin, in, let us say, the face of crude torture."

"Let us not say, and then say that we did," countered Marlin.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Thursday, January 17, 2013

Paperback 592: The Obstinate Murderer / Elisabeth Sanxay Holding (Ace Double G-519)

Paperback 592: Ace Double G-519 (1st ptg / 1st ptg, 1965)

Title: The Obstinate Murderer / The Old Battle Axe 
Author: Elisabeth Sanxay Holding
Cover artist: Uncredited / Uncredited

Yours for: $12

AceD519bc

Best thing about this cover:
  • "You wanna know how I got to be a murderer? Persistence, that's how. Never say die. Or, you know, say 'DIE' really loud and then, bam, bring down the axe!"
  • The harrowing tale of a generic detective who pursued a generic whey-faced woman through the studio of famed artist Alberto Giacometti for some reason, and ...
  • It's like she's pleading with the reader to help her get out of this painting.
  • Holding gets raves from obscure regional media: The Burlington News says ... Waterbury American raves ... New Bedford Standard-Times opines ... 

AceD519

Best things about this other cover:
  • "Oh, newel post. I guess it's just you and me now, old friend."
  • Her dust inspections were nothing if not thorough.
  • The full title is "The Old Battle Axe Is Wedged In My Forehead Help Me Get It Out"

Page 123~ (from The Old Battle Axe)

"The wooden railing's been broken up there at the head of those steps. It's a good sixty-foot drop, and he landed on the rocks. Death must have been almost instantaneous."
"I'm glad of that," she said, sipping the whisky. It did not burn her now; she did not bother with the water. 

"I'm glad of that," HA ha. The old battle axe likes her double-entendre neat!

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Friday, November 2, 2012

Paperback 577: Club Tycoon Sends Man to Moon / Felix Mendelsohn Jr. (Book Co. of America 13)

Paperback 577: Book Co. of America 13 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Club Tycoon Sends Man to Moon
Author: Felix Mendelsohn Jr.
Cover artist: [signature illegible] [Brennan? Boorman? Boron?]

Yours for: $20

BCA13.ClubTycoon
Best things about this cover:
  • That! That is what I want to look like when I'm 75. Like an old Greek rap star supervillain. If I don't end up with a Money Throne, a Soviet missile, and a real-life Modigliani model in my house by the time I die, I will consider my life wasted.
  • I assume that throne is also some kind of hovercraft. I mean, why would you go through the trouble of building something that awesome if it couldn't fly?
  • I bought this book because it is insane-looking. A silly-sounding title from a very minor press, written by a guy with a ludicrous pseudonym. If I had a "Kabinet of Kooky Kuriosities," I'd put this book there.

BCA13bc.ClubTycoon

Best things about this back cover:
  • You have no idea how much I *don't* want to know what "built-in stump" means.
  • You can get your "World's Greatest Lecher" mug at CreepyChristmasGifts.com
  • I love how "wonderfully gay" is echoed further down the page by "a bachelor by choice" (and, possibly, "Cryptanalyst").
  • According to that final sentence, the author and I are 80% alike. This worries me.
  • Publishers were correct in their prediction that this would not be Felix Mendelsohn Jr's last novel. He seems to have written one other, "Superbaby," which I Must Acquire:
BERJAYA


Page 23~ (the book is exactly 122 pages long)
Wayne: "What's your line, Mr. Dormin?"
Dormin: "Laxatives."
Sure. Why not?

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

P.S. Hope my east coast readers weathered Sandy successfully. We had a state of emergency up here, but nothing happened. Still, I was prepared:

tumblr_mcocpbyeEV1qj58uko1_500

P.P.S. I've been meaning to post this pic of a sign for a local deli — in Endwell (!) NY — just 'cause. I haven't been in yet, but I am ... curious:

tumblr_mckadhexKb1qj58uko1_500

Sunday, May 20, 2012

Paperback 529: After Sex With the Single Girl / Richard Bernstein and William Storm Hale (APS 9505))

Paperback 529: APS Books 9505 (PBO, 1965)

Title: After Sex With the Single Girl
Authors: Richard Bernstein & William Storm Hale
Cover artist: N/A

Yours for: $6


APS9505.AfterSex
Best things about this cover:

  • A short-lived experiment in quilting the book title
  • Originally called "Cigarette With the Single Girl," but that title was deemed to have totally missed the authors' (alarmist) point.
  • I like how William "Storm!" Hale kept his pro wrestling name for this gig.


APS9505bc.AfterSex
Best things about this back cover:

  • "Honey, I have something to tell your nose..."
  • "Sex-prone teens!" So sex is like allergies or acne. Good to know.
  • There's nothing dynamite likes less than having light shed on it.

Page 123~ (actually 122—close enough)
John Doe would like to commit adultery, but who wants him? One fat, balding man put it candidly: "What chick would want to go to bed with me unless I paid her?" Such honesty is rare, but he was right; from a self-assured young man, he had been transformed into a jelly-fish slob.
"Such honesty is rare ... but I'm going to pile on his fat ass anyway."

This book is *heavily* underlined and occasionally annotated. My favorite annotation is at the beginning. It's just a list:

page 75—Racial marriages
         77—Gang bang
         131—Normal

It's like some kind of (horrible) poem

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

The P. Morrison Donations #10: Tickets for Death / Brett Halliday (Dell 8884)

The P. Morrison Donations #10

Dell 8884 (1st ptg, 1965)

Title: Tickets for Death
Author: Brett Halliday
Cover artist: Robert McGinnis


Dell8884.TixDeath

Best things about this cover:
  • "Tickets for Death ... I mean Raffle! Tickets for Raffle. Forget what I said about Death. We are raffling off this lovely couch. You like?"
  • When throw pillows attack!
  • What is that amorphous green splotch in the right foreground? Another throw pillow (suspended in mid-air)? A very very puffy ottoman? The back of a man who is doubled-over and heaving on the carpet (head toward the center, out of frame)?
  • I love how she was clearly painted nude and then some purple came along and hopped on as a kind of afterthought. It's a rare evening gown that allows you to see every contour of the navel area.


Dell8884bc.TixDeath
Best things about this back cover:
  • So is that MAME or MAMIE, pronunciation-wise?
  • "This racket, she is encrusted with diamonds and rubies. You like?"
  • "But with a girl like Mayme, you just want her to shut the hell up and do the sex."

Page 123~

His belly shivered gently, like a protuberant bowl of jelly, each time he breathed.

A nice hard-boiled riff on "'Twas the Night Before Christmas"

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Paperback 475: Sex in the Shadows / Randy Salem (Beacon B799X)

Paperback 475: Beacon Books B799X (PBO, 1965)

Title: Sex in the Shadows
Author: Randy Salem
Cover artist: Al Rossi

Yours for: $50


SexShadows.Lesb

Best thing about this cover:
  • "Fine, turn away, but you're never going to miss these painted-on capris, baby, I promise you!"
  • "'According to Jim!?' You're watching 'According to Jim!?' You disgust me. I'm going to Margo's."
  • Wait, is Ivy the older lesbian's name? Or do older lesbians prowl the way that ivy ... prowls ... up the walls of colleges and ballpark walls?
  • "Gee, my hair smells terrific."
  • I'm still trying to work out the symbolism of the orange throw pillow.


SexShadowsBC.Les

Best things about this back cover:
  • "... and certainly no hero ..." is a great line. "Don't worry—no man parts for as far as the eye can see!"
  • Searching! Scorching! It's not Frank! But it does have a character named Francine, which is something.
  • I know that when I think of lesbians, the first image that pops into my head is: brawls.

Page 123~

I was thinking of Martha and me and how we must look to that wise old moon—just two more grains of sand on a desolate stretch of beach, two flecks of nothingness.

"Two Flecks of Nothingness" should've been the title — "It's like Seuss meets Sartre meets coastal lesbians," says Michiko Kakutani

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Saturday, October 8, 2011

Paperback 463: Mr. Madam: Confessions of a Male Madam / Kenneth Marlowe (Paperback Library 55-857)

Paperback 463: Paperback Library 55-857 (1st ptg, 1965)

Title: Mr. Madam: Confessions of a Male Madam
Author: Kenneth Marlowe
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: $9
paplib55857.mr.madam

Best things about this cover:
  • Oh good, an Adult Autobiography. I always hate it when children try to write autobiography. Grow up first, you self-involved whiners!
  • How can a book with this subject matter and this title have a cover this terrible. I mean, consider some other covers (which I just found, while trolling the internet):
BERJAYA


BERJAYA
[Hairdresser of the stars!? Why is this info not on my paperback!?]
  • Kenneth Marlowe was also a female impersonator. More pics:
BERJAYA

And now the back cover:

paplib55857bc.mrmad

Best things about this back cover:
  • Ugh. A chalkboard drawing? Is this supposed to be a "twilight man?"
  • Not even the word "frank" to appease me. I hate this book (cover). [I just opened the book and the very first phrase on the very first page is "Uncompromisingly frank," so I feel a little better]

Page 123~

"You all try to help 'Frenchy' get dates, girls. Oh, be sure to remember to call him 'Frenchy.' If you get a date with a John, tell him that for five bucks extra you can have Frenchy sent in. Tell the trick, 'Let Frenchy come in and work on me. It makes me go wild!' That'll work the John up. Or, for $10 he'll work both you and the John. Well, I don't have to tell most of you how to manage it. Use your imaginations. Frenchy will, of course, be working all the exhibitions."

To its credit, this book does get pretty dang 'frank' (esp. by 1965 standards). Why it's not called "FRENCHY!"—with accompanying super-campy picture—I just don't understand.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Paperback 462: In Search of Sin / Gil McDonald (Saber Tropic 915)

Paperback 462: Saber Tropic 915 (PBO, 1965)

Title: In Search of Sin
Author: Gil McDonald
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: $20


sabtr915.searchsin

Best things about this cover:
  • "Mission ... accomplished."
  • "Don't mind me kids. I'm good. Carry on."
  • "Did somebody order a debonair voyeur?"
  • Whenever Steve went out spying on his wife, he always brought along HAL-9000 for backup.


sabtr915bc.searchsin

Best things about this back cover:
  • Quite possibly the best back cover opening line I've ever read.
  • As good as the first line is, the second line is equally bad. Passive voice, kids ... it's a killer.
  • If you want to kill your boner, just read this back cover. Nothing unsexier than clunky, amateurish writing about sex.

Page 123~
"I take it you're off on some half-baked idea of your own about how to catch these people," he continued, as his cigar again jabbed the air savagely.
Fly paper and swatters were fine for some people, but for Captain Gregory, nothing was so satisfying as taking down a pesky fly with a lit cigar—foolish appearance and inefficiency be damned!

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Paperback 373: Bewitched / Al Hine (Dell 0551)

Paperback 373: Dell 0551 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Bewitched
Author: Al Hine
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: [SOLD 11-28-10]

Dell0551.Bewitched

Best things about this cover:
  • Big crush on Elizabeth Montgomery. Big big crush. Love this show, esp. Agnes Moorehead as Endora.
  • Sexy witch. Wish the pic were bigger. Stupid text.
  • "Sexy-hexy" is an adjectival form that I really would like to see more of.
  • I want to tell the cover artist "she's not that kind of witch," but she's kind of hot as "that kind of witch," so I'm torn.
  • AL HINE anagrams to INHALE.

Dell0551bc.Bewitched

Best things about this back cover:
  • I love how the opening line suggests that they were having out-of-this-world sex.
  • "In book form," HA ha.
  • "Over-hexed"—OK, you've maxed out the pun card.
  • This book sounds much saucier than the TV show.
  • Is the blurb for the TV show or the adaptation? Moreover, wtf is the "Philadelphia Bulletin?" Is that like the "Springfield Shopper?"

Page 123~

"Poor man wants a cigarette," Bertha said. "Give him one, darling."
Samantha chuckled and fixed her nose: "Addis Ababa Enamels, Walk a Mile and Meet Some Camels," she said.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Monday, November 15, 2010

Paperback 370: The Law and the Marriage Bed / Gary Gordon (Monarch 472)

Paperback 370: Monarch 472 (PBO, 1965)

Title: The Law and the Marriage Bed
Author: Gary Gordon
Cover artist: photo

Yours for: $12

Mon472.LawMarriage

Best things about this cover:
  • "A probing analysis!" — "Probing ... not with *that* thing, you're not! I mean, a little legal fetish is one thing—I'll wear the black robe and shout "All rise"—but the gavel is right out!"
  • Her hair is ridiculous.
  • His is not much better.
  • "Case histories" = (very) softcore porn.
  • It takes a special kind of literalist to come up with the "gavel + bouquet on pillow" motif for this book.

Mon472bc.LawMarriage

Best things about this back cover:
  • Whoa, whoa. You think you could ease me into the rape talk!? Who leads with that question!? Yeesh.
  • Hey look, it's the same ugly photo as on the cover. The production budget for this book must have been about $12.

Page 123~

The case of Rex v. Rex (39 Ohio App. 295, 177 N.E. 527) sets forth the principle that for coitus between separated husband and wife to be condonation [of previous adultery], it must be voluntary and not induced by fear, intimidation or secured by trickery.

I would read the novelization of this ruling: "Rex v. Rex" — c'mon, that's a great title.

~RP

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Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Paperback 369: Just For Kicks / Donna Powell (Satan Press 111)

Paperback 369: Satan Press 111 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Just For Kicks
Author: Donna Powell
Cover artist: [Gene Bilbrew]

Yours for: $50

Satan111.JustKicks

Best things about this cover:
  • His eyes! His teeth! His lopsided ribcage!! His ankle!!! Dear lord make it stop!
  • Those women are fantastically grotesque. A disquieting combo of hot & weird & malproportioned
  • I can't tell if they are flirting with him or about to kill him. Veronica seems only seconds from bringing that drink smashing down on the mummy's head...

Satan111bc.JustKicks

Best things about this back cover:

  • A drug-fueled, sex-soaked road trip to Mexico sounds fun. The "indignities and perversions they are subjected to" while "prisoners" ... that could go either way.
  • "Ironic"—HA ha. Yes, when I looked at the front cover, my first thought was, "O. Henry!"
  • The condition of this book is &*^%ing unreal.
Page 123~ (pleasebeawesomepleasebeawesomepleasebeawesome)

"This place gives me the willies," she glanced toward the stage where the Shetland was still lunging away at the diminutive red-head. And she still looked bored.

Uh ... oh. Oh my. That's ... something. Yet somehow the comma splice in first sentence is bothering me at least as much as the horse-on-girl action.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]