Paperback 880: Bump and Run / Marty Domres (Bantam N7253)

Paperback 880: Bantam N7253 (PBO, 1971)

Title: Bump and Run
Author: Marty Domres (w/ Robert Smith)
Cover artist: Uncredited (!@!^%&) [Bill Wenzel]

Estimated value: $15-20

Best things about this cover:

• It is criminal that the cartoonist didn't get credit here. CRIMINAL. (And yes, that *is* the first and most important comment I have about this cover) [this site credits Bill Wenzel, so … I'm going with that]
• One man's desperate quest for the Perfect Grope. He's so close! Leave him alone, you other ladies!
• I love how obliging the stewardess is. Heels *and* tiptoes *and* chest thrust. She looks more like a mermaid figurehead on an 18c. pirate ship than a human being in any kind of normal position.
• That is some classic '70s Playboy near-naked lady cartooning there.
• This book is much better written, and much more political (specifically anti-racist) than you'd expect from the cover.

Best things about this back cover:

• There is nothing I can add to improve on this.
• You cannot throw a football from that position.
• When you can cast spells like Marty, you don't need no stinkin' helmet.

Page 123~

We expect to find conditions everywhere as they are in California, where there is no craning of the neck and muttering, no indignant or unbelieving stares, no glowering visages at the sight of a black man and a white girl enjoying each other's company. Any place that sets out to bar blacks, in the manner of the unreconstructed South, might just as well put up a sign that closes the place to pro football players altogether.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 813: I Always Wanted to Be Somebody / Althea Gibson (Pyramid G478)

Paperback 813: Pyramid G478  (1st ptg, 1960)

Title: I Always Wanted to Be Somebody
Author: Althea Gibson (ed. Ed Fitzgerald)
Cover artist: Robert V. Engel (aka 'Engle' for some reason)

Yours for: $18


Best things about this cover:

• Not the most dynamic painting, but striking and endearing, as straight portrait painting goes. Rare, if not unique, in my collection for featuring (or even mentioning the existence of) a female black icon.
• I normally squirm at handwriting fonts, but this one is somehow lovely. Nice change of color on "Somebody."
• I wish this cover (or the back cover) featured more, uh, tennis.

Best things about this back cover:

• There's something at least a little insulting about a back cover photo that showcases the fucking queen, while the ostensible subject of the book is literally marginalized, with her back turned. Also, I resent the idea that shaking hands with the queen makes you "somebody." I want the triumphant, trophy-holding shot!
• This back cover actually makes the book sound fantastic. Minus the "jungle" / "Harlem" connection. That, I could do without. I realize "Asphalt Jungle" is a book / movie title, but still…
• Oooh, *hard* liquor! Wow, that *is* tough. No Bud Light Lime-a-Ritas for her!

Page 123~

CONGRATULATIONS. EDNA CRIED WITH JOY. I KNEW YOU'D DO IT. SUGAR RAY.

~RP

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Paperback 596: A Handy Illustrated Guide to Basketball / ed. Sam Nisenson (Perma Books 47)

Paperback 596: Perma Books P47 (1st ptg, 1949)

Title: A Handy Illustrated Guide to Basketball

Edited by: Sam Nisenson

Cover artist: Uncredited [Really!?!? it's an "illustrated" guide and the illustrator gets no credit? Come on...]

Yours for: $7

Best things about this cover:

• This is from that weird phase in Perma's history where they were releasing paperbacks in hardback form. Paperback-sized, but with stiff boards.
• I like how "spectators" and "fans" are different entities. Like there's this class of watcher out there who's like "I'm gonna watch this sport I don't like."
• Would've been inconvenient to buy paperbacks in Canada. 39 cents!? Just make it 40. Don't make me carry a penny or a loonie or nuknuk or whatever they call their currency around.

Best things about this back cover:

• Mmmm, scintillating description of the object I'm holding in my hand. Tell me more about the "wear-resistant finish"...
• This back cover copy has me wondering about the meaning of the word "permanent."
• "Books to Keep"—because their earlier motto, "Books to Burn," proved disappointing, sales- (and lawsuit-) wise.

Hell yeah ILLUSTRATIONS. 

[If you want to play basketball, the first thing you should know is: middle-aged men *will* want to rassle you.]

[Pretend the basketball is your penis, stick out your weird man-breasts, and then ... sure, yeah, great, do that]

[Use the basketball as a conduit for your psychic powers]

[This is how you show another player you like him]
Page 123~

The ball becomes alive, or goes into play, when it leaves the hand of an official on a toss for a jump ball, or is placed at the disposal of a free thrower, or when it touches a player in the court after a throw-in from out of bounds. 

The ball becomes alive! Now that would add an interesting twist to the game. "Ouch! It bit me! Hey, ref ..."

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]