Paperback 845: Uncle Good's Week-End Party / John Faulkner (Gold Medal 1031)

Paperback 845: Gold Medal 1031 (PBO, 1960)

Title: Uncle Good's Week-End Party
Author: John Faulkner
Cover artist: Barye Phillips

Estimated value: $20-25


Best things about this cover:

• Try to find a creepier title/cover art pairing. Go ahead. I'll wait.
• Uncle Good likes to watch. And smoke. And hunch. And not tuck his shirt in.
• The funniest thing on this cover is "Faulkner."
• MTV canceled this after one season.
• What is "NOOT?"

Best things about this back cover:

• I like how this cover starts, anyway.
• Let me get this straight: I'll laugh at the side-splitting antics of an old man who rents out his own daughters? An old man who is his daughters' pimp? Or does he rent them out as clowns for children's birthday parties? Please say "B."
• ORTA. That is all.

Page 123~

Orta June and Jewel Mae had stood up as the husbands came stumbling and crawling across the porch. Soon the husbands were thick around them.

This is like a zombie movie. But with husbands.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 810: The Intimate Stranger / William Lynch (Lion Books 25)

Paperback 810: Lion Books 25 (1st ptg, 1950)

Title: The Intimate Stranger
Author: William Lynch
Cover artist: Woodi (Ishmael)

Yours for: $10


Best things about this cover:

• "No … not the dress strap … alright, alright, I give. I'll murder someone."
• Melissa's lessons in "how to use furniture" were long and grueling.
• I genuinely like her whole get-up. 
• The Erotic Awakening of Ward Cleaver.

Best things about this back cover:

• Well, there's your first problem, lady. You gotta offer yourself to one of them there sane guys.
• "He was an artist … you know how they are."
• Green polka dots are my new favorite back cover design concept.

Page 123~

The underbrush scraped her bare legs, leaving torn, painful weals, sometimes tearing away filings of flesh and her hands were sore and torn with the constant grasping of bushes for support.

That is a manifestly terrible sentence, on several levels, and yet I kinda wish the book were titled "Filings of Flesh."

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Paperback 607: Ain't Gonna Rain No More / John Faulkner (Gold Medal 927)

Paperback 607: Gold Medal 927 (PBO, 1959)

Title: Ain't Gonna Rain No More
Author: John Faulkner
Cover artist: Mitchell Hooks

Yours for: $20


Best things about this cover:

• Whoa. Hey, uh, Dorothy? Your underwear called. It wants to know why you left it at home.
• How many signifiers of hickdom can you cram onto one cover? (answer: infinite). It's all whittlin' and pail sittin' and stove-humpin' with these folks. 
• "If this were a cartoon, my hat would've flown off my head *this* far!"

Best things about this back cover:

• OK, that dress is way more, uh, titillating in higher-contrast B&W. The distinction between polka dot and nipple is at this point irrelevant.
• "for furnish" ... what in the George Shaw is that?
• With the door jamb, she looked like she was striking a sexy little pose. Without the door jamb—lice-picking.

Page 123~

"I need my bucket up here to flang at her again, ifen I could git her back on the porch. She's been right shy about coming out on the porch sinct that there bucket chased her offen the end."

I sincerely hope that when I am old, I will have one of theme there flangin' buckets to flang at people who get up on my porch without permission.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]