Paperback 987: New York: Confidential / Jack Lait & Lee Mortimer (Dell 1534)

Paperback 987: Dell 1534 (2nd ptg, 1951)

Title: New York: Confidential
Author: Jack Lait & Lee Mortimer
Cover artist: Robert Stanley

Estimated value: $12-15
Condition: 8/10

Best things about this cover:

• Guys! Dolls! Together!
• Robert Stanley's people are always ridiculously rich and creamy.
• Seriously, the art is gorgeous. That dark aquamarine NYC night sky somehow works perfectly.

Best things about this back cover:

• Map! Back! Mapback!
• It's a pretty dang dull map, from a design point of view, but the "Key" on p. 240 is amazing. All those little numbers on the map represent "Hotels," "Night Clubs & Restaurants," "Theaters," and "Shopping":

Also, there are appendices of cool info like "Headwaiters' Names" (!?) and a "Glossary of Harlemisms":



Page 123~

Do not use cheap perfume when night-clubbing (or at any time).

~RP

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Paperback 950: The Screaming Cargo / J.M. Flynn // The Bullet-Proof Martyr / James A. Howard (Ace Double F-130)

Paperback 950 (!): Ace Double F-130 (PBO / 1st ptg, 1962)

Title: The Screaming Cargo / The Bullet-Proof Martyr
Author: J.M. Flynn / James A. Howard
Cover artists: Uncredited / Uncredited

Estimated value: $10
Condition: 7/10

Best things about this cover:

• Screaming babies in the cargo hold? Jeez. Grim.
• Love the Telly Savalas-esque skyward-looking guy. "Who loves you, screaming babies?"
• Cool font. Cool tie. Weird lambada-on-the-tarmac.

Best things about this other cover:

• This looks like someone's intense hate-drawing diary. Ugly, dumb, red.
• Why is the eye candy so tiny? The visual equivalent of burying the lede.
• Her left arm is the dumbest thing I've seen in 950 paperbacks worth of posing. "How's that, baby? You like it when mama puts just one arm in her jacket? Yeah, you like it." What the hell?

Page 23~  (there are no p. 123s) (from The Screaming Cargo)

She was more girl than woman. She wore her hair in a pony tail—soft dark hair. She wore a too-tight blouse and short shorts, and she had a face that might've been innocent a few weeks earlier.

A few weeks earlier ... you know, before she took up knitting. Nobody comes back from that, man. Nobody.

~RP

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Paperback 944: The Shadowy Third / Marco Page (Pocket Books 537)

Paperback 944: Pocket Books 537 (1st ptg, 1949)

Title: The Shadowy Third
Author: Marco Page
Cover artist: Harvey Kidder

Estimated value: a pittance
Condition: 2/10 (read to death, i.e. beautiful to me)

Best things about this cover:

• "Now *where* did I put my little dead man? I know he's around here somewhere..."
• This dude has QWD face (i.e. Quintessential White Dick). He's ... perfect / generic.
• The man above our hero's left ear is either playing "got-your-nose!" or putting that guy's eye out with a lit cigarette. Choose a scenario to fit your mood!
• P.S. a violin

Best things about this back cover:

• "Oh, no! Not Igor *Krassin*!" I exclaimed, reflexively.
• "What kind of knife was it, Doc?" "Thin. It was thin. It's a technical term. I don't expect you to understand."
• It took more than a game of eeny-meeny-miney-mo to finger the killer. You also had to buy him a drink first.

Page 123~

"All right, if that's how you want it. I trusted you, Calder, I gave you every break so you could grab a fee on that violin. You're turning out to be a heel."

I love hardboiled man-feelings drama. "After all I've done for you, couldn't you just once hold me and tell me I'm pretty, Calder, you heel!"

~RP

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Paperback 923: Crime-Craft / ed. Anthony Boucher (Corgi S488)

Paperback 923: Corgi S 488 (1st ptg, 1957)

Title: Crime-Craft—as demonstrated in fifteen topline stories by The Mystery Writers of America
Editor: Anthony Boucher
Cover artist: Oliver Brabbins

Estimated value: $30

Best things about this cover:

• My kingdom for a corgi who fetches books
• That is possibly the most generic hard-boiled face of all time
• Angry Military Dude's Face, brought to you by Nike
• This book is gorgeous, bright, square ... and English. How it ended up in the US, at a university book sale, I do not know.

Best things about this back cover:

• That is ... pretty low-frills
• The one thing this bland back cover does is highlight how nice that Corgi logo is
• Look for the Corgi dog ... which you will be able to identify as a Corgi only by the proximity of the letters "C O R G I," so ... look for those too.

Page 123~ (from "The Fuzzy Things" by D.B. Olsen)

"Keep the child's ears covered," Miss Rachel told Dorothy. She met Mr. Thackley's frantic stare. "The sea cliff," she said softly.

This is some creepy, gothic stuff. Also, that last sentence is pretty, in a lilting, iambic kind of way. "'The sea cliff,' she said, softly...."

~RP

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Paperback 918: Call for the Saint / Leslie Charteris (Avon 526)

Paperback 918: Avon 526 (1st ptg, 1953)

Title: Call for the Saint
Author: Leslie Charteris
Cover artist: Uncredited

Estimated value: $10-15

Best things about this cover:

• Tied-up lady's expression: "So, uh, are we gonna do this or aren't we? .... guys?"
• This looks more like ballet than a legit needle take-away. What is that showoff one-handed bullshit? With that dramatic right hand? WTF, Saint?
• Would-be assailant is both racially and genderly ambiguous. I'm going with Philippine woman, but that's a (needle) stab in the dark.
• This cover has needle *and* bondage, so it's priceless, no matter what the market dictates.

Best things about this back cover:

• She's got quadrilateral eyes!
• Needle me once, needle me twice!
• No shapely rags for you, missy!
• "Almost screamed"? Not sure if her voice didn't quite there, or if she thought better of it, and went for demure statement instead.

Page 123~

"Killed? De Champ? Why, he'll moider de bum!"

Had to read this a few times to get it. I figured De Champ was a French dude.

~RP

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Paperback 873: Case of the Village Tramp / Jonathan Craig (Gold Medal 930)

Paperback 873: Gold Medal 930 (PBO, 1959)

Title: Case of the Village  Tramp
Author: Jonathan Craig
Cover artist: Uncredited

Estimated value: $15-20

Best things about this cover:

• Detective Peter Selby prepares to add another tiara to his collection.
• Detective Peter Selby could use a new mattress too, actually, now that he thinks of it.
• Today this apartment goes for $1.8 million.
• I want to go to the Village Bar. Right now. I think Detective Peter Selby does too.
• One Red Shoe is paperback code for TRAMP (I guess).

Best things about this back cover:

• The belt.
• "Small *black* pumps? [Looks at cover] Aw, crap, someone get the art department on the phone!"
• I feel like "this was the Big Sleep" needs a HUGE asterisk next to it.

Page 123~

"You're talking to the wall, lover," she said. "Good-by and good luck."

Another great line I insist you use today. I need to start a compilation. Maybe a line of t-shirts.

~RP

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Paperback 864: A Man Called Spade / Dashiell Hammett (Dell 411)

Paperback 864: Dell 411 (2nd ptg, 1st thus, 1950)

Title: A Man Called Spade
Author: Dashiell Hammett
Cover artist: Robert Stanley

Estimated value: $30

Best things about this cover:

• Spade's tie is super-excited for battle.
• If you looked in a 1950 encyclopedia under "Private Dick": this picture. Chiseled. Determined. Behatted. Textbook.
• Fear Hand Photobomb!
• The scale / perspective is All wrong on this, but given that awesome green shirt, I'm gonna allow it.
• "She screamed as Spade dashed up the stairs"—get it? "Dashed"? Yeah, you get it.
• I have a friend whose kid is named Dashiell. Art Spiegelman's son is named Dashiell. This concludes the Dashiell-shout-out portion of my the program.

Best things about this back cover:

• Mapback!
• Whoa. You know, sometimes we forget that 1940s apartments were all long couches and putting greens.
• Max Bliss is the best unintentional porn name I've come across in a Long time.
• I love a pitcher of Bloody Marys as much as anyone, but maybe ease up on the celery there.
• Wow, Max Bliss's daughter is taking that "50 Shades of Grey" thing a bit literally.

'
Page 123~ (from "Too Many Have Lived")

She was short, square, as if carved economically from a cube. 

Talk about economical. That is some haiku-esque objectification right there. Classic.

~RP

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Paperback 849: Warrant for X / Philip MacDonald (Pocket Books 328)

Paperback 849: Pocket Books 328 (1st ptg, 1945)

Title: Warrant for X
Author: Philip MacDonald
Cover artist: Uncredited

Estimated value: $10-15


Best things about this cover:

• "Light, damn you! Stupid modern, flame retardant bodies! I want s'mores now!"
• By far the fanciest lamppost you're likely to see on any of my covers.
• I genuinely love how the body spills out of frame. And the color scheme. And the "X".

Best things about this back cover:

• "Kidnapping!" is pretty anti-climactic. "Cannibalism!" was about what I was expecting with that build-up.
• They used to tell you how much it would cost to ship the book to a soldier overseas. Now it's just "Share it with anyone in a uniform, don't ask us what it costs, how should we know?" I hope people gave books to their diner waitresses.

Page 123~

He said: "I'm a busy man. Great matters hang upon my every word and action." He drank coffee. "I might justly be likened to the spider."

Though not lacking in confidence, Anthony was still working on his metaphor skills.

~RP

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Paperback 835: Butcher's Dozen / John Bartlow Martin (Signet 909)

Paperback 835: Signet 909 (1st ptg, 1952)

Title: Butcher's Dozen
Author: John Bartlow Martin
Cover artist: Harry Schaare

Estimated value: $12-$18


Best things about this cover:

• "Larry, are you… are you even trying? I feel like I'm doing all the work here. Would you lift for real, please? My calves are freezing."
• Larry's a sucker for a left boob. "She's dead, Larry. Give it a rest."
• Oooh, the *authorized* abridgment! I've been looking everywhere for this. Said no one.
• "Torso Murders!" It's about a guy who really hates Greek statuary.

Best things about this back cover:

• Never The Completely Sane Butcher. Not once. Unfair to butchers!
• Whoa, "dismembered his victims in a sadistic, sex-crazed frenzy" is pretty gruesome stuff. Lady on cover appears to have all her limbs, so maybe she's not dead after all. You're off the hook, Larry. Sort of.
• Dude looks like a lecherous psychologist.

Page 123~

On February 8 Klansmen and bootleggers clashed in the center of Herrin, and Caesar Cagle was killed. (Art Newman later claimed that one of the Shelton boys had put a pistol to Cagle's ear and, when he started to turn, said "Oops, too late," and shot him; this cannot have been quite true, since Cagle was shot in the chest.)

If by "cannot have been quite true" you mean "cannot have been true," then yes.

~RP

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Paperback 831: April Evil / John D. MacDonald (Gold Medal d1579)

Paperback 831: Gold Medal d1579 (1st thus, 1965)

Title: April Evil
Author: John D. MacDonald
Cover artist: Bill Johnson

Estimated value: $10-$15


Best things about this cover:

• The hot new book that finally answers the question: How many trenchcoated, fedoraed detectives does it take to find a lost contact lens?
• You know what they say: April Evil brings May Bondage.
• After looking at this picture, I wonder if it's not the "hold-up gang" that's "sleepy."
• This is a fine, if weird, painting. Good use of small canvas. Her simple white top and blue skirt, surrounded by the lurking, drab frames of generic menace, make her really pop off the page.

Best things about this back cover:

• Ugh.
• Don't you hate it when women choose the easy sluttish rut? Challenge yourselves, ladies!
• How can you be "going to flab" while "losing something in the guts department"? Writing 101: don't let your stupid metaphors cancel each other out.

Page 123~

She smiled, and she felt cat-agile, rabbit-soft, mare-ready.

This was a vast improvement from a half hour earlier, when she had felt dog-tired, armadillo-hard, and lemur-unprepared.

~RP

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Paperback 830: Trinity in Violence / Henry Kane (Avon 618)

Paperback 830: Avon 618 (PBO, 1955)

Title: Trinity in Violence
Author: Henry Kane
Cover artist: Uncredited

Estimated value: $10-$15


Best things about this cover:

• A great cover mucked up by someone's bright idea of a teaser. "Let's put the first words of the book on the cover! It'll be revolutionary!" "Where are we gonna put them?" "Why … here, right across the bottom half of the dame. Nobody likes dames on covers anyway. It's words, Words they cry for!"
• I feel like she's so pinned in by darkness that we really Need the color from the bottom half of her dress. It honestly takes me several takes, every time I look at this thing, to realize it's a fur over her right shoulder and not some weird dark thing in the foreground blocking my view.
• Also, is the apartment building on fire? If not, why is there thick black smoke around the title?
• She looks an awful lot like my second college girlfriend. My girlfriend tended to wear more clothes and carry fewer guns than this lady, but still … if this lady we're looking at is named "Rosie" (as that damned block of text suggests), then that's another weird connection, as "Rose" was an element of my girlfriend's name.
• There's something quintessential about this cover. Not great on its own, but great at capturing a certain cover type: generic, be-hatted, trenchcoated sap stands in as proxy for reader/viewer. Doesn't matter what he looks like. It matters what She looks like. And it matters that she's trouble.

Best things about this back cover:

• I love the primitive video game-like swarm of armed "A" logos. I just need a Peter Chambers icon and a joystick.
• Henry Kane looks like he wants desperately to escape the photo shoot.
• "The Scandinavian?"

Page 123~

He nudged a pinky-point at his thin mustache.

From his picture, it looks like Henry Kane knows from thin mustaches. Authenticity, thy name is Kane.

~RP

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Paperback 819: The Dain Curse / Dashiell Hammett (Vintage V-624)

Paperback 819: Vintage V-624 (1st thus, 1978)

Title: The Dain Curse
Author: Dashiell Hammett
Cover artist: Alan Reingold

Yours for: $12


Best things about this cover:

• Oh, '70s. Never change.
• Aside from the horrible color scheme, the other things that scream "'70s" are the particular look of the cult leader (very hippy-Jesus-chesthair) and the Manson-murder-looking girl.
• I actually kind of love this cover. Highly unusual, lots going on. Long live Mustachioed and Fedoraed James Coburn!

Best things about this back cover:

• Just the dumb-looking statue and some words. With the ornate title font now in isolation, we are left to marvel at its bright blue shadow. The book really wants to convey period authenticity, really, it does, but …
• The aesthetic appears to be "Deco Goes to Woodstock."
• Ross Macdonald secretly hated Chandler (for good and bad reasons), and so every quote I read from him now about anyone else's greatness, including his own, always contains a tacit, "So Fuck You, Ray!" This includes the Macdonald blurb often used on Chandler covers.
• I tend to leave books just as I bought them. Hence the '90s price tag. No sticker puller, I.

Page 123~

"Now how can you say that?" he remonstrated. "Ain't she a dope fiend? And cracked in the bargain…?"

I would read "Ain't She a Dope Fiend?"

~RP

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Paperback 662: The Saint in Europe / Leslie Charteris (Avon 611)

Paperback 662: Avon 611 (1st ptg, 1954)

Title: The Saint in Europe
Author: Leslie Charteris
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: $10


Best things about this cover:

• The Saint, starring in ... a PSA about V.D.
• Her shoes are amazing.
• Her dress isn't bad either.
• I like how they're both standing in their own little pools of light. It's not a dynamic painting, but it's got an ambiguity and tension and sexiness that I like.

Best things about this back cover:

• "Gayest!"
• Cows that wear diamonds? Oh, Europe. 
• I always did like that little Saint icon.

Page 123~

"Just think of me," said the Saint, "as a guy with a weakness for puzzles, and an incorrigible asker of questions."

~RP

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Paperback 661: The Cinnamon Murder / Frances Crane (Bantam 130)

Paperback 661: Bantam 130 (1st ptg, 1947)

Title: The Cinnamon Murder
Author: Frances Crane
Cover artist: Gillen

Yours for: $12


Best things about this cover:

• Nooo! Not Cinnamon! She was our best pole dancer!
• The space priestess kneeled to anoint the body—as The Hat commanded.
• Warren Beatty in "Dick Tracy" called ... yeah, he's gonna need his jacket back.
• Seriously, unless she's going to be hiding among taxis later, that dress is a bit much.

Best things about this back cover:

• HA ha. The hat! — at least I think that's what that drawing by the "M" depicts; unless it's a very knobby hand holding a very stout wine glass. 
• "The Pat Abbotts" sounds like a '50s folk music outfit.
• "Her best John Frederics' hat"! O man, the hat is a character. There's a niche market: hat crime. It's like hate crime, only with a short 'a'.
• I haven't read this, but I'm imagining a very low-rent Nick & Nora. And instead of Asta—a hat.

Page 123~

Mr. Couch's blue eyes rested on me and then, looking back at Patrick he said, "I'm afraid I'm being pretty frank."

Oh, sweet, sweet 'frank.' I've missed you.

~RP

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Paperback 655: A House in Naples / Peter Rabe (Gold Medal k1337)

Paperback 655: Gold Medal k1337 (2nd ptg, 1963)

Title: A House in Naples
Author: Peter Rabe
Cover artist: Lu Kimmel

Yours for: $9


Best things about this cover: 

• "Heh, I like to watch, heh heh."
• She's like a soap actress looking off-stage to read her next line.
• She appears to be kneeling on a twin bed that is in the middle of the room, dressed in some kind of summery get-up. None of this makes any sense. 
• And here I always thought the "Spillane vein" was a euphemism for "penis."

Best things about this back cover:

• Jeez, stamp more shit on it, why don't you? I didn't wanna read the text anyway.
• First sentence of that fourth paragraph ("She was leaning...") was written by someone who should not be allowed anywhere near words.
• Actually, I think an Italian-to-English translator-bot did this copy. It's just tin-eared and awful.  

Page 123~

Charley watched the yawl heel and take a close, steady course. He was sure the guy at the wheel was a Sardinian. They can handle a ship when they're half dead. 

Chapter-closing line. I quite like it.

~RP

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Paperback 652: Mystery on Graveyard Head / Edith Dorian (Berkley Books G-176)

Paperback 652: Berkley Books G-176 (1st ptg, 1958)

Title: Mystery on Graveyard Head
Author: Edith Dorian
Cover artist: Sternberg (?) (sig. not totally legible)

Yours for: $9


Best things about this cover:

• I don't know what these kids were doing, but I'm guessing it has something to do with "graveyard head."
• Fear hand! Or "I'm choking" hand, not sure. (see "graveyard head" joke, above)
• You are *terrible* at hiding, Red.
• Look, if you're gonna make out in a freshly-dug gave, maybe wear shoes?
• The tree behind stalker-man is comically evil.

Best things about this back cover:

• Wow, whatever 5th-grader wrote this cover copy is very talented. 
• I used to perform magic under the name "The Mysterious Wiggins."
• "A feeling of tense excitement mounts"! (see "graveyard head" joke, above)

Page 123~

The three on the steps grinned at them cheerfully. "Sit right down," Bart said heartily. "Kick off your shoes and take down your hair. Grab yourself a fistful of brownies. This is 'refugee hall'; a fat lady tramped on Sal's instep."

I was with you there til that bit at the end about the fat lady. Maybe ease up on the fistfuls of brownies, Bart.

~RP

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Paperback 651: Mystery Walks the Campus / Annette Turngren (Berkley Books G-158)

Paperback 651: Berkley Books G-158 (1st ptg, 1958)

Title: Mystery Walks the Campus
Author: Annette Turngren
Cover artist: Harry Schaare

Yours for: $6


Best things about this cover:

• "Mystery" would be a pretty cool girl's name, come to think about it.
• This is a great cover painting. No, really. It's clearly geared toward a female audience (i.e. the woman is  in serious student mode and decidedly non-tarted-up), so it doesn't have what we'd normally call "Great Girl Art (GGA)," but she's *really* well rendered. I love art that conveys tension through small movements, especially as those movements are captured in clothing. I'm mesmerized by her right foot, as well as the flow of her jacket and the wrinkles across the front of her skirt. Her environment is pure noir. All rain-slicked pavement and moonlight/streetlight. Good stuff.
• This reminds me of a specific part of the U Michigan campus—specifically, where campus proper meets South U. Ave. But I'm guessing this also looks like about a million campuses.

Best things about this back cover:

• Endicott! I live near there. 
• You gotta love a mystery that turns on "the mutterings of a parakeet." I imagine the parakeet pacing in his cage, smoking and then occasionally saying something about what you can do with your desire to hear him "sing."
• I like how excited the Christian Science Monitor is about addiction and compulsion.

Page 123~

They took a cab home, and Wendy tried hard to be pleasant—and sympathetic about the headache. But she had a feeling it was as non-existent as Sky's hay fever had been the night of the barbecue supper. Sometimes I'd like to shake her, she thought.

As if Sky's name alone isn't reason enough to want to shake her.

~RP

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Paperback 608: Sleep in Thunder / Ed Lacy (Tempo T48)

Paperback 608: Tempo Books T48 (PBO, 1964)

Title: Sleep in Thunder
Author: Ed Lacy
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: $9


Best things about this cover:

• Are Tempo books for children? Why does this shout "young adult" at me? The rainbow logo, maybe. I know, rainbow should shout "gay," but it doesn't. I don't know what's going on here. Some kind of visual tone problem.
• "Psst, kid. You dropped your left arm back here."
• Nothing about this cover says "Sleep" or "Thunder." It does, however, say "Grime." "Hide in Grime," I'd call it. 
• Why would you make the figure in the foreground *by far* the least interesting thing about your cover?
• I'll give this cover one thing: it captures the essence of Alley (now that's a fragrance I might wear: Essence of Alley).
• I love how "EDGAR" is in quotes, like it's not quite a real thing. "So-called..."
• Kid has "Fear Hand."™

Best things about this back cover:

• "José"? "Juan"? Makes me realize how invisible Hispanics are on mid-century paperbacks. 600+ entries, and only one is tagged "Hispanic" (!?!?!). Oh, wait, two westerns are tagged "Mexicans." That's ... more than one. But none of them are what you'd call mainstream paperbacks from major publishers. Just an observation.
• I'm not sure this Big Fuchsia Text Jutting Into Regular Black Text thing is working.
• "One of death's many grotesque angles"—I really want a chart depicting these angles. I mean, *really* want a chart ...

Page 123~

José licked the leaves, which didn't help his thirst much. When he returned to the room downstairs he took the pot with him, for the plant seemed as lonely and forgotten as himself.

I'm ... a little worried for what José's gonna do to that poor plant.

~RP

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Paperback 602: The Body Lovers / Mickey Spillane (Signet P3221)

Paperback 602: Signet P3221 (1st ptg, 1967)

Title: The Body Lovers
Author: Mickey Spillane
Cover artist: photo cover (pictured: author Mickey Spillane himself)

Yours for: $11


Best things about this cover: 

• In which Mike Hammer hunts down the monsters who designed this poor girl's wardrobe.
• The budget for this cover shoot appears to have been about six dollars. Give or take.
• Somewhat unfortunate that, in this pose, it looks like Hammer was caught on the verge of violating a corpse. Talk about your "Body Lovers!"
• This is flawless, unread copy.

Best things about this back cover:

• Ooh, I actually like the tricolor effect.
• Underground orgy cults are the best kind of orgy cults. All the other orgy cults are too mainstream.
• Next time someone claims to be a V.I.P. ... now you know.
• Is that Buffalo News blurb praise or horrified observation? "Moose bondage!? Dear lord!"

Page 123~

"Just so you can't say we're not covering every route I'll see what Interpol has on Ali Duval and have them pick up anybody in a fez who isn't a shriner."

Exotic headwear enthusiasts, beware.

~RP

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Paperback 573: Net of Cobwebs / Elisabeth Sanxay Holding (Bantam 26) (w / dust jacket)

Paperback 573: Bantam 26 (1st ptg, 1946) (dust jacket, undated)

Title: Net of Cobwebs
Author: Elisabeth Sanxay Holding
Cover artist: Uncredited (original) / [signature appears to read "Gillen" ?!] (dust jacket)

Yours for: $75

Best things about this cover:

• I vote "Sucker!"
• This is what happens when you park your car in the living room.
• Peeping Toms get off on the strangest things...
• This is the cover of the dust jacket. As I have said before, dust-jacketed paperbacks are quite rare in any condition. This one is remarkably tight. Dust jacket and all its permagloss are completely intact and uncreased.

Best things about this back cover:

• I do like a "floating lady heads" cover.
• Wow, that red ink really bleeds. 
• One of those rare instances where it looks like the cover to the original hardback edition was better.

Here are the front and back covers of the original, un-dustjacketed edition:



Page 123~

He got out of bed, naked as a worm, and went to the window; there was a gray mist outside, but it was day. He could see the garage. And that made him remember all of it. Murder, blackmail, grief. Who wouldn't sell a farm and go to sea?

This was taken from her earlier short story, "The Worm Who Sold His Farm and Went to Sea."

~RP

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