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Showing posts with label Sold. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sold. Show all posts

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Paperback 554: The Secret Adversary / Agatha Christie (Avon 100)

Paperback 554: Avon 100 (1st ptg, 1946)

Title: The Secret Adversary
Author: Agatha Christie
Cover artist: Bower (I don't know how I know this, or who this is—I'm just reading the ID tag I made years ago)

Yours for: SOLD! (9/3/12)
Avon100.Adversary
Best things about this cover:
  • Mmm, the fine art gilded frame look is Classy.
  • The quote is kind of enigmatic, esp. if you stop before the ellipsis. But even after the ellipsis, it sounds like they're saying "if you absolutely must read a crappy, preposterous novel, read this one."
  • That man's fall bears no plausible relation to the blow he appears to have just taken. Maybe the guy in the hat just snatched his cane. Or maybe that thing on his face is a bat which has just flown into his nose.

Avon100bc.Adversary

Best things about this back cover:
  • We've seen this before. This is what back covers looked like when paperback publishers felt they still had to justify the whole format to their readership.

Page 123~
Tuppence caught herself nervously looking over her shoulder. The big wardrobe loomed up in a sinister fashion before her eyes. Plenty of room for a man to hide in that ...
Silly Tuppence. Relax. Everyone knows wardrobes lead only to Narnia. Go see Mr. Tumnus! Then you'll be Tuppence & Tumnus (sitcom-ready relationship).

~RP

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Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Paperback 541: The Case of the Careless Kitten / Erle Stanley Gardner (Pocket Books 724)

Paperback 541: Pocket Books 724 (1st ptg, 1950)

Title: The Case of the Careless Kitten
Author: Erle Stanley Gardner
Cover artist: "Front cover photograph by Paulus Lesser"

Yours for: SOLD! (6/20/12)

PB724.TCOTKitten
Best things about this cover:
  • "Hey, what's up? My name's Gary. I'm here to read for the role of 'Careless Kitten.' So ... do I stand here, or ... what? Oh, too close? Sorry."
  • Perry Mason solves 'The Case of the World's Least Meme-able Cat'
  • Seriously, this cover makes me laugh more than most covers I own. What the hell is happening? I love this cat. He's like the vintage paperback Anti-Cover. "No semi-naked ladies to see here, fella. MOVE along ..."
  • This was one of maybe 30 *more* ESG / AA Fair books I got from a generous reader. That makes 60-70 total. I'm gonna start reading the Perry Mason stuff in order ... if I like it, I'll keep going (at his worst, Gardner is competent, so I think I'm going to like it).


PB724bc.TCOTKit
Best things about this back cover:

  • When Helen Kendal lost the second "L" in her last name, she knew just where to turn.
  • That's a human "corpse," I assume. Because one murdered kitten may be my limit.
  • When I want to add spice to my hot dish, I collect a scalp. Of course.

Page 123~

Della Street went on rapidly. "It's that way when someone near to you passes away. It's a shock. Your brother must have been smart, Mr. Lunk."

"Despite what his name suggests," she added.

~RP

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Friday, September 9, 2011

Paperback 455: Erotic Interlude / Bob Elmer (Dragon Editions 143)

Paperback 455: Dragon Edition DE143 (PBO, 1966)

Title: Erotic Interlude
Author: Bob Elmer
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: [SOLD!: 9/9/11]

DE143

Best things about this cover:
  • OK, I've seen bad wigs, and I've seen Bad Wigs, but this thing wins.
  • She took men to her Fortress of Solitude, where she screwed them and then promptly froze them in pillars of ice.
  • If you just focus on the upper parts of her breasts and chest, this cover looks nice. But if you move your eyes from that spot even a fraction of an inch in any direction: disaster.
  • What's holding up her boobs? Remnants of an old dish rag? Plaster of Paris? A tennis ball that's been cleaved in half and pried open?
  • If you're gonna get yourself a sex machine, you need to make sure it's trained. Untrained sex machines can really chew you up. Trust me.


DE143bc.Erotic

Best things about this back cover:
  • "UNIQUE SKILL!" — Nice. Nothing sexier than the language of a job resumé.
  • So we're just forgoing indefinite articles in our cover copy now? OK then...
  • I've read Mad Libs that made more sense than this—Mad Libs filled out by kids who don't even know what "adjective" means.
  • This was one of the earliest efforts at sex novel cover copy writing by Professor Frink's Smut-Bot 5000. When you look at it that way, it's pretty good.

Page 123~

The blonde began blazing a trail of kisses down Delia's body. And then her hand began doing things.

Delia hated it when her lovers surreptitiously played "Angry Birds" during sex.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Tumblr]

Friday, April 15, 2011

Paperback 403: The Sex Cure / Elaine Dorian (Beacon B535F)

Paperback 403: Beacon B535F (PBO, 1962)

Title: The Sex Cure
Author: Elaine Dorian
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: SOLD!




BeacB535F.SexCure

Best things about this cover:
  • "We need the painting now." "But ... it's not finished yet. I've only just sketched the couch." "Fuck it. No time. Color the couch and the entire background with purple crayon. That'll have to do."
  • Dr. Justin Riley's OCD compelled him to check all his patients for Ring Around the Collar.
  • This embrace is so awkward that I'm forced to wonder if he is embracing a warm and willing patient or helping J.C. Penney relocate some of their mannequins.
  • "Darling ... your shirt tastes wonderful."
  • Love the stethoscope. Just in case you thought it was some random guy in a smoking jacket.
  • Really wish the first tagline had an ellipsis or colon, and then just two more words: "his dick!"




BeacB535Fbc.SexCure

Best things about this back cover:
  • Man, that's more text than you'd think you'd need to sell this thing.
  • "Misty Powers," HA ha.
  • "You Will Be Shocked," "You May Be Angry"... They forgot "You May Be Strangely Aroused"
  • "You May Be Angry" ?? — "I can't believe this fictional character is doing bad things! How dare he!?"

Page 123~

"Nuts." The word exploded in his head and he gave up trying to sleep and reached for a cigarette.
OK, technically that's on page 122, but "'Nuts.' The word exploded in his head..." was too good for me to be a stickler. 122 ... close enough. I mean, I could also have gone with "Every woman I touch, he had said only scant hours ago, turns into a whore," and then asked "Wait ... how many hours?" But I stand by my choice.

~RP

Saturday, February 19, 2011

Paperback 388: Magazine of Science Fiction & Fantasy, August, 1955

Paperback 388

Title: Magazine of Science Fiction & Fantasy (August, 1955)
Authors: Poul Anderson, Henry Kuttner, C.L. Moore, Anthony Boucher, and Elisabeth Sanxay Holding
Cover artist: Ed Emshwiller

Yours for: SOLD!

F&SF.Aug55

Best things about this cover:
  • Farmer Ted Goes to Planet Blortron
  • If Norman Rockwell did paintings about interstellar, interspecies sexual confusion, they might look something like this: "Wheeeere are youuuuuu goinnnng!? Youuuuu sed youuuuu luvved meeeeee... Take this hellllmet off riiight nowwww..."
  • I love the highly underrated Elisabeth Sanxay Holding, and I'm pretty sure I bought this magazine ONLY because she had a story in it (she's more an eerie thriller writer than a scifi writer, normally)

F&SFbc.Aug55

Best things about this back cover:
  • Well if Eva Gabor and Guy Lombardo say so, who am I to disagree?
  • Love the font on "IMAGINATION."
  • "Better newsstands" ... ??? "Man, this is one classy newsstand! ... it's got an awning and everything!"

Page 123~

from "The Tiddlywink Warriors" by Poul Anderson and Gordon R. Dickson
Too late, Alex remembered that he had left Toka without a supply of the potent liquor which was so much a part of everyday Hoka life. Whether known as wine, red-eye, rum, grog, uisgebeatha or Old Spaceman, it was always present in wholesale quantities. Now, for the first time, Alex found himself with a bunch who had it not.

When I am a very elderly man, living on some lunar outpost because of nuclear war / End Times, I will drink "Old Spaceman." Proudly.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Paperback 374: The Making of Star Trek / Stephen E. Whitfield & Gene Roddenberry (Ballantine 73004)

Paperback 374: Ballantine Books 73004 (PBO, 1968)

Title: The Making of Star Trek
Authors: Stephen E. Whitfield & Gene Roddenberry
Cover artist: photos

Yours for: [SOLD! 12-5-10]

BB73004.MakingST

Best things about this cover:

  • If I were a Star Trek fan, I would be geeking out so hard over this very cool paperback original
  • That Enterprise is absurdly model-kit-looking in this photo. Maybe that's the point? "How it works!—we make cheap-ass models and use trick photography, suckers."
  • Further, "How it works"? I like how it implies that the tech is real.
  • Those are two handsome spacemen.

BB73004bc.MakingST

Best things about this back cover:

  • A "biography" of a TV show! Printed while said show was still on the air. Pretty visionary / ballsy.
  • Seriously, this back cover isn't lying. This book is Thick and chock full of photos, internal memos, a miniature episode guide, and a chapter entitled "Whither Star Trek?"! Oh, and whoever owned this book originally was a megageek, as there are tiny clipped-out TV Guide epsiode summaries taped and/or paperclipped into the episode guide section. Also, this section is annotated in some kind of code.

Page 123~

When the first screening was over, the general reaction from the people in the room was, "This is the most fantastic thing we've ever seen."

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Paperback 373: Bewitched / Al Hine (Dell 0551)

Paperback 373: Dell 0551 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Bewitched
Author: Al Hine
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: [SOLD 11-28-10]

Dell0551.Bewitched

Best things about this cover:
  • Big crush on Elizabeth Montgomery. Big big crush. Love this show, esp. Agnes Moorehead as Endora.
  • Sexy witch. Wish the pic were bigger. Stupid text.
  • "Sexy-hexy" is an adjectival form that I really would like to see more of.
  • I want to tell the cover artist "she's not that kind of witch," but she's kind of hot as "that kind of witch," so I'm torn.
  • AL HINE anagrams to INHALE.

Dell0551bc.Bewitched

Best things about this back cover:
  • I love how the opening line suggests that they were having out-of-this-world sex.
  • "In book form," HA ha.
  • "Over-hexed"—OK, you've maxed out the pun card.
  • This book sounds much saucier than the TV show.
  • Is the blurb for the TV show or the adaptation? Moreover, wtf is the "Philadelphia Bulletin?" Is that like the "Springfield Shopper?"

Page 123~

"Poor man wants a cigarette," Bertha said. "Give him one, darling."
Samantha chuckled and fixed her nose: "Addis Ababa Enamels, Walk a Mile and Meet Some Camels," she said.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Friday, October 8, 2010

Paperback 360: The Big Bust / Ed Lacy (Pyramid X-2037)

Paperback 360: Pyramid X-2037 (PBO, 1969)

Title: The Big Bust
Author: Ed Lacy
Cover artist: F. Pfeifer

Yours for: SOLD! (10/8/10)

Pyr2037.BigBust

Best things about this cover:
  • [Insert joke about connection between title and woman's rack here]
  • For a woman who's tied up, gagged, and carrying a tiny drowning man in her stomach, she's awfully concerned about those guys behind her. Lady, you've got your own problems.
  • I have reluctantly tagged this post with "Redhead" label, though honestly I don't know what you call that color.

Pyr2037bc.Bigbust

Best things about this back cover:
  • Geek observation #227: "Supercharged" is just "surcharged" with "P.E." inside it. . .
  • So the woman is like good pancakes. Well, who wouldn't want to tail that?
  • If the boardwalk is "bikini-filled," does that mean the ocean is filled with naked women (who, presumably, all left their bikinis on the boardwalk)? I hope so.
  • One of these paragraphs should immediately be countered with "That's what she said!"

Page 123~

Walter awoke me at one-fifteen and watching for snakes, back of a crumpling wall, I changed into the woolen underwear and rubber suit, Rhoda's $60,000 bra doubling as a jock strap.

[Speechless]

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Paperback 341: Crooked House / Agatha Christie (Pocket Books 753)

Paperback 341: Pocket Books 753 (1st ptg, 1950)

Title: Crooked House
Author: Agatha Christie
Cover artist: Paul Kresse

Yours for: SOLD! (10/10/10)

PB753.Crooked

Best things about this cover:
  • Extreme Close-Up!
  • The needle—beautifully rendered, with fantastic detail. Has an apparent weightiness and heft, a solidity, that makes it really stand out. The indentation of needle on skin is a wicked little touch. Nice.
  • The talons—nothing accentuates a hypo cover like sexy/sinister blood red nails.
  • I guess "Crooked House" is a more mass-market-friendly title than "Granddad's Heroin Addiction"

PB753bc.Crooked

Best things about this back cover:
  • Well, there's one "Who?" for each of the listed suspects, but somehow piling them up in a line there at the end diminishes their rhetorical effect / makes the imagined narrator sound like a psychotic owl.
  • Someone named her child "Clemency?" "And this is my brother, Parole, and my sister, NoloContendere."
  • Most enigmatic description I've seen in a while: "Death meant something special to weak-looking Laurence." With that kind of set-up, Laurence better be a carrion-devouring zombie or I'm going to be Very disappointed.
Page 123~

"My dear Sophia, do you really think an old gentleman of over eighty is the best judge of a child's welfare?"

Judging by the cover, grampa's got bigger problems than being 80.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Saturday, June 5, 2010

Paperback 321: Wicked Women / ed. Lee Wright (Pocket 1263)

Paperback 321: Pocket 1263 (PBO, 1960)

Title: A Butcher's Dozen of Wicked Women
Editor: Lee Wright
Cover artist: Morgan Kane

Yours for: SOLD!

BERJAYA
Best things about this cover:
  • If they'd just get rid of the text and let me see what she's looking at, this cover would be perfect.
  • Great Girl Art, Girl With Gun, Gams Galore, all overlooking a cityscape. I live for covers like this. Subtle, sexy, delicious. Her arm position, her hip cock ... perfect. If I woke up in a hotel room and *this* is what I saw when I looked over at the balcony, I could die a happy man.
  • Problem: the painting gives off an urban, hard-boiled vibe. Those authors ... do not. I mean, they're fine, if you like more traditional mysteries, but the ones I recognize are somewhat cozier than authors I tend to read. There *is* a Kenneth Millar (aka Ross Macdonald) story inside. Not sure why he's not on the cover, as he is pretty well established at the time of this book's release.
BERJAYA
Best things about this back cover:
  • Cool '60s design — vaguely rectangular swatches of different bright colors arranged in asymmetrical relationship to one another — continued from front cover.
  • I'm torn between the practical Lucy and the vengeful Daihili.

Page 123~

from "Suspicion," by Dorothy L. Sayers

He sipped it thoughtfully, standing by the kitchen stove. After the first sip, he put the cup down. Was it his fancy, or was there something queer about the taste? He sipped it again, rolling it upon his tongue. It seemed to him to have a faint tang, metallic and unpleasant. In a sudden dread he ran out to the scullery and spat the mouthful into the sink.

I read one novel by Sayers and the mystery (or rather, its solution) was So preposterous that I never read another. I will say, however, that the woman knows her way around a sentence. She translated Dante, after all.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Friday, November 13, 2009

57 Books from the University Book Sale: Book 12

Title: You're A Riot, Andy Capp
Author: Smythe
Cover artist: Smythe

Yours for: SOLD 9/18/10

BERJAYA
The follow-up to the hugely successful "Andy Capp Sounds Off," "Andy Capp Strikes Back," and "Andy Capp Beats His Wife Into a Coma Then Has a Pint of Stout and Watches Rugby"


BERJAYA
Page 123 (or thereabouts) ~

BERJAYA
~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Friday, August 7, 2009

Paperback 274: Man Divided / Dean Douglas (Gold Medal 407)

Paperback 274: Gold Medal 407 (PBO, 1954)

Title: Man Divided
Author: Dean Douglas
Cover artist: Barye Phillips

Yours for: SOLD! (Aug '09)

BERJAYA
Best things about this cover:

  • In case it's not clear, "half world" = gay gay gay. See also "twilight world."
  • "He had to choose — a half world or a world of woman's love" — if his posture's any indication, that decision has already been made.
  • The guy in the chair displays the classic "Sucker Slouch" (TM). It's common on noir/hardboiled covers. We will see a variation of this pose again on Sunday.
  • You can almost hear the guy deflate: "ohhhh ... fuck." He can't even look at ... her? Wait, how do I know the seated guy is the "Man Divided" in this scenario? Why do I have a feeling that the "woman" in the pale green has a voice like Jack Palance?
BERJAYA
Best things about this back cover:
  • See, I told you. "Twilight world." Right on cue.
  • "Then the contest began." I hope it's a baton-twirling contest. I love a good baton-twirling novel.
  • "The problems of our times" = worst euphemism for homosexuality ever. I'll take outright offensive over this hazy blandness. Hell, I'd take "baton twirling" over this.

Page 123~

The next morning there was the mute evidence on the floor, the broken glasses and the pool of water from the melted ice cubes. Cromer had been furious about something. She had not asked. She had waited curiously to see.


Bi-curiously, that is.

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Paperback 262: Too Hot to Hold / Day Keene (Gold Medal 931)

Paperback 262: Gold Medal 931 (PBO, 1959)

Title: Too Hot to Hold
Author: Day Keene
Cover artist: uncredited [Robert McGinnis]

Yours for: SOLD (7/23/09)

BERJAYA
Best things about this cover:
  • I Love This Cover. It's unusual and enigmatic and just oozes sophistication and coolness and mystery. I *want to know* what she is doing, where she is going, who's in the cab with her, all of it.
  • Great Girl Art that isn't hyper-sexed. Great gams, great gloves, and Great Hair.
  • "Death" is kind of anticlimactic after "torture." Not really shocking. Kind of the next logical step. Now "... leading men to soup ... and death!" That would be shocking.
  • Sadly, this title has put the theme to Ghostbusters II in my head: "Too hot to handle / Too cold to hold / They're called the Ghostbusters and they're in control!" — Oh, Bobby Brown, this world was never meant for one as beautiful as you.
BERJAYA
Best things about this back cover:

  • If you like green/brown, or off-center typography, this is the cover for you.

Page 123~

Linda Lou stopped pretending and ran her hands over her flat body. She could be carrying the first of them now. The thought made her blush. After the way she'd acted, if it was possible for a woman to conceive more than once in a night, she probably had a whole family inside her.


You'll be relieved (maybe) to know that this passage is not directly related to the scene of abuse and torture (possible rape?) on the book's back cover. Still, though ... I'm kind of creeped out. "A whole family?" OB/Gyn: "Hey, there's a mom and dad, three kids and a dog in here. How'd that happen?"

~RP

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Paperback 259: Lincoln's Commando / Ralph J Roske and Charles van Doren (Pyramid G356)

Paperback 259: Pyramid G356 (1st ptg, 1958)

Title: Lincoln's Commando
Author: Ralph J. Roske and Charles Van Doren
Cover artist: Herb Mott

Yours for: SOLD (7/19/09)

BERJAYA
Best things about this cover:
  • The title and picture made me laugh out loud the first time I saw it. That is the only reason I own this book. "Arnold Schwarzenegger is ... Lt. William Cushing in ... Lincoln's Commando!"
  • Actually, this guy looks more like ... who's that guy from "Ned and Stacey" and "Sideways?" Thomas Hayden Church?
  • The rebels on the Albemarle appear to be shooting in random directions and possibly at each other.
  • The water under Cushing's boat appears to be breaking on ... more, differently colored water. Weird.
  • Here we see Cushing continuing the time-honored tradition of deck-edge weapon-dancing begun years earlier by the infamous Pirate Wench.
BERJAYA
Best things about this back cover:

  • Not much. We do get to see the NYT succumbing to a bout of sensational alliteration. That's slightly interesting.
  • Apparently Cushing was a daring daredevil with a daredevil career of daredeviltry. He was also fearless. And daring.

Page 123~
He was pleased to discover that his adventures were well known in the town, that the paper reported his arrival on its front page, and that all the little boys hung on his every word when they could get him to describe his exploits — and not only the little boys; everyone seemed appreciative.


"[...] and not only the little boys ... I mean, not that he's particularly into little boys or anything. Really, he was popular with everyone. I swear. Forget what I said about the boys."

~RP

P.S. Thanks for keeping up with my stepped-up summer publication pace. I'm loving the volume and quality of comments. Happy that the blog has a modest but loyal and reliably smart/funny following. Keep it up.

P.P.S. Thanks for the links, the tweets, and any other form of promotion you've provided for this site. Truly, deeply appreciated.

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter]

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Paperback 257: Pirate Wench / Frank Shay (Pyramid Giant G75)

Paperback 257: Pyramid Giant G75 (1st ptg, 1953)

Title: Pirate Wench
Author: Frank Shay
Cover artist: uncredited

Yours for: SOLD (July '09)

BERJAYA
Best things about this cover:

  • Catherine Zeta-Jones stars in ... "Braless Zombie II: Zombie's Revenge"
  • As I scanned this image, the Violent Femmes "Prove My Love" was playing on iTunes. It contains the lyric, "... we've all been through some shit." In the case of Pirate Wench, this appears to be literally true. Who draws their braless heroine with brown stink lines emanating from her body?
  • "Outlove?!" "Outfuck" really works better here. It's more alliterative. And, I'm guessing, more accurate.
  • Shirtless man: "I have a gun ... and yet I am powerless to resist her magical pirate dance."
  • Shirtless man: "I wonder where I can get a shirt like that ... I'm tired of the crew teasing me about how manly and ungay I look"
BERJAYA
Best things about this back cover:

  • If you like your sex "raw" and "blood-stained," you'll love "Pirate Wench!"
  • " ... a night below deck": That is one, tough, tiring way to "win men's allegiance." How is one woman supposed to put a whole crew together. No wonder this book is "raw" and "blood-stained."
  • She's pro-vocative. Screw you, ablative!

Page 123~

There were nine pirates captured and there were nine gibbets; no one about to go on trial would be found not guilty.


"No one ... would be found not guilty." Is that litotes? (Def: A figure of speech consisting of an understatement in which an affirmative is expressed by negating its opposite, as in This is no small problem.) Pretty fucking uppity for pirate smut.

~RP

P.S. A Portuguese reader (yes, I have one) sent me a link to the following book cover: a Portuguese version of Gil Brewer's "Wild to Possess" (you can see part of the American cover in my header, between "Pop" and "Sensation" ... the redhead w/ the gun). Very cool to see pulpy covers redone for foreign markets.

BERJAYA

Sunday, June 28, 2009

Paperback 248: Murder Won't Out / Russel Crouse (Pennant Books P24)

Paperback 248: Pennant Books P24 (1st ptg, 1953)

Title: Murder Won't Out
Author: Russel Crouse (... and somewhere, a letter "L" runs free ...)
Cover artist: Charles Binger

Yours for: $15

BERJAYA
Best things about this cover:

  • That's the French whoriest French whore that ever French whored her way from here to French Whoretown. Not sure how she ended up in NYC.
  • "Tiny trashcans for sale! ... who will buy ze tiny trashcans? ... I call zem 'Can Cans' ... yes, zat is why I'm dressed like zis ... clevair, no?"
  • After "Nights in Rodanthe," Diane Lane decided to start taking much darker roles.
  • "Murder Will Out" is an old phrase — Chaucerian old — in case you weren't sure what the title was going for here.
BERJAYA
Best things about this back cover:

  • Yes, but what's the book about?

Page 123~

It was no longer the Broadway of the Lombardy poplars and the convivial taverns. The trees had long since given way to lamp posts to light its darkest corner. The Great White Way, to coin a phrase, as somebody had once upon a time.

That passage starts out OK, but the wheels really come off in that last "sentence." "... as it were, so to speak, as they say ..."

~RP

Friday, June 26, 2009

Paperback 247: Terror in the Streets / Howard Whitman (Bantam A964)

Paperback 247: Bantam A964 (1st ptg, 1952)

Title: Terror in the Streets
Author: Howard Whitman
Cover artist: Robert Maguire

Yours for: $10

BERJAYA
Best thing about this cover:

  • Ah, 1950s paranoia at its finest
  • Can't a pretty girl get a haircut at 1 a.m. without being team-stalked by tough guys in olive drab suits anymore? What a world ...
  • Guns 'n' Roses' "Welcome to the Jungle" was based on this book cover
  • Maguire would eventually learn his lesson: Put Girl In Foreground!

BERJAYA
Best things about this back cover:

  • You can tell even from this crowded array of scenes that Maguire is a masterful illustrator. Great faces, action, use of light...
  • Love the action in the alley by the garbage cans. Smacked his fedora off with a blackjack. That's about as 50s as 50s violence gets. Fedora still in mid-air. Rich.
  • Every quote reads like it's coming out of the mouth of Maude Flanders: "Won't somebody please think of the children!?"

Page 123~

The police are hardly interested in, nor would the average police mentality be capable of understanding, such psycho-dynamics. Police are interested in end-results. When an old homosexual is found dead in his hotel room after picking up a man at a bar, the police just put it down as a "fag murder" and go on from there.


~RP

Sunday, May 31, 2009

Paperback 234: Diagnosis: Love / Barbara Bonham (Monarch 466)

Paperback 234: Monarch 466 (PBO, 1964)

Title: Diagnosis: Love
Author: Barbara Bonham
Cover artist: Lou Marchetti

Yours for: $15

BERJAYA
Best things about this cover:

  • The long awaited prequel to "Diagnosis: Murder"
  • Whatever was going on in "their private lives," it apparently involved massive amounts of nitrous oxide
  • "Take off that clown make-up. This is a hospital, not a whorehouse!" / "Oh fuck you, Steve. Perform the appendectomy yourself. I'm going outside to smoke ... and maybe talk to Larry. That's right, I said 'Larry.' Asshole."
BERJAYA
Best things about this back cover:

  • "Garnet?"
  • "Chad!" - that's more like it.
  • " ... a strange malady ..." - later diagnosed as "hot pants"

Page 123 (last page!)~

He took the thermometer from her and glanced at it quickly. "Normal. No germs here. It would be perfectly safe to kiss you." He pulled her up into his arms.

I really hope that thermometer was in her mouth.

~RP

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Paperback 221: Like Love / Ed McBain (Permabooks M-4289)

Paperback 221: Permabooks M-4289 (1st ptg, 1963)

Title: Like Love
Author: Ed McBain
Cover artist: Robert McGinnis

Yours for: SOLD (June '09)

BERJAYA
Best things about this cover:

  • "Dear God, please let me score with this chick from Cirque de Soleil. Amen."
  • "Dammit! Why won't my eyebrows stay *down*!?"
  • "Man, my thumbnails look *weird* up close..."
  • "Oh, Steve, I'm tired of you and your shadow puppets. Can't we just get back to hanging drapery?"
  • What the hell is with the title?: "It's *like* love, baby, just ... minus all the caring and sharing and listening to your damned problems. OK?"
  • This will sound odd, but the softness of the coloring and the fine pattern on the wallpaper reminds me of John Singer Sargent portrait that I love.
BERJAYA
Best things about this back cover:

  • Tommy and Irene - sounds like a one-hit wonder pop duo from 1963
  • Carella and Hawes - sounds like a crime-fighting duo from 1974
  • "ourselfs" - ouch
  • Authentic imitation wood paneling! Really, one of the awesomest design choices in modern back cover art history

Page 123~

"Miscolo!" he yelled.
"Yo!" Miscolo yelled back from the Clerical Office.
"Bring in some iodine and some Band-Aids, will you?"
"Yo!" Miscolo answered.

~RP

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Paperback 216: The April Robin Murders / Craig Rice and Ed McBain (Dell D306)

Paperback 216: Dell D306 (1st ptg, 1959)

Title: The April Robin Murders
Author: Craig Rice and Ed McBain
Cover artist: Robert McGinnis

Yours for: SOLD (June '09)

BERJAYA
Best things about this cover:
  • Signature super-hot McGinnis woman ... until you get up to the head. Then it's The Joker's mom. Holy moly.
  • I hope I don't offend anyone when I say that McGinnis draws the best asses, anywhere, ever. His women tend to be a little gaunt and a little dead-eyed for me, in general, but from waist to knees I have zero complaints.
  • Oddly comical cover for McGinnis, perhaps because the book is a kind of dark comedy. Love the Spy vs. Spy wavy dagger in the dead guy's hand. Also, love his hand. Awesome agony hand.
BERJAYA
Best things about this back cover:

  • I think you mean "A Front," but OK.
  • I want you to write a story for me that begins "So Bingo and Handsome..." I would read that story.
  • Why are those phrases hyphenated in the second paragraph. So Wrong. So Wrong. Trying to see humor ... failing ...
  • I would wear a t-shirt that read simply "What You Need In Hollywood Is "Front"" - enigmatic!
  • Um, I just noticed that she has pompons on her ankles for some reason. What the hell is that all about? Or is she being attacked by Evil Tribbles?

Page 123~

There were a great many things to say, Bingo reflected, and none of them really seemed to fit the occasion. He stood by the doorway, deciding between "How did you get in?" "What are you doing here?" and "Who are you?"


~RP