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The Wayback Machine - https://web.archive.org/web/20170704191131/http://johnkstuff.blogspot.com/search/label/Donald%20Bastard
Showing posts with label Donald Bastard. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Donald Bastard. Show all posts

Thursday, July 31, 2014

Monday, February 01, 2010

Slab's First Fist 17 : the Decision

" and the winner... by stoppage is..DONALD, THE RAPTOR....BASTARD!!"

BERJAYABobby Bigloaf is up and cheering his cartoon hero. He rushes to congratulate him.

The vanquished Slab and his ruined pooberty fists skulk away in shame.

BERJAYABobby gives a Donald a well-practiced, furry-worthy-man-hug as Big John looks down with pride at the scene of youthful joy. There's nothing like a good dose of violence to warm the heart of any decent red-blooded boy!
BERJAYA"Gee Mr. Cartoon Bastard," squeals Bobby, "you sure showed those bullies!"
BERJAYAThen the poor little future cartoon-scribe laments his own natural wimpiness. "Gosh, I was wish I could kick some bully butt like you, but I'm just a little old defenseless fatty."
BERJAYABig John has the answer: "Bobby, you don't have to work out for 10 years to get a black belt in self-defense! We need you eating potato chips and writing superhero comic books!
BERJAYAWhat you do need is this fancy-ass official Donald Bastard T shirt! No one's gonna mess with you in a manly shirt like this!
BERJAYADonald Bastard
Bobby quickly tears the sweat-stained white shirt off of his smooth shiny chest...
BERJAYATo be continued...

Hey folks, I just cracked 10,000,000 hits today! Thanks to you.BERJAYA
Here's Mr. Paal, a talented young cartoonist celebrating the occasion he helped happen.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Slab's First Fist: 8 Battle Begins

Both combatants simultaneously deliver a punishing blow.
BERJAYASlab is bruised but not out.

DB fires a kick to the head with furious webbed force.

BERJAYA
Slab's hurt! He has a mouth full of crushed jawbone and teeth fragments!

This would finish any regular bully, but it just makes Slab mad!BERJAYAOh! A perfect driving elbow to the solar plexus from the ring bastard!

Followed by a flying knee! This could be it, folks! Nobody should have to take this kind of punishment!
BERJAYADonald is jumping up and down! He's taunting his opponent! Oh the humiliation!"
BERJAYASlab looks to his corner! "WhattadoIdo now 'Ern??!"
BERJAYAErnie advises: "Do that move we learned in Sunday School!"

Slab leaps into a bill-crunching Superman punch! "What a fight! What a fight!"
BERJAYADonald is knocked to the matt. He's on his back! "Ground and pound 'im like Father McGinty showed ya, Slab!" shouts Ernie! "Pretend he's one o' those ATHEIST duck bastards!"
BERJAYA
Slab dives on the dazed mallard.

To be continued...

Original Doodles Glitch:
jk003jk014jk150
There are still some doodles left and I added a new set.
jk162jk067

READ ABOUT CARTOONS AND CHAINSAWS HERE

Can you do me a favor though? If you put one in the shopping basket, then change your mind, please take it out of the basket. Otherwise it says "This one is gone." Then other people think it is no longer available. Last night someone put every drawing in a shopping basket and made other people think there were no doodles left.

If you see any other glitches, let me know.

Thanks!

Your best friend

John

Tuesday, December 08, 2009

Slab's First Fist 6: Enter Bastard

Bobby's favorite Toon wrenches himself out of the message board.
BERJAYAHe spins and is ready for action.

BERJAYAOut spews his famous hat.
BERJAYA
BERJAYADonald goes into his anticipation...
BERJAYA..and explodes offscreen!
BERJAYAOutside the carnage continues unabated.
BERJAYADonald Bastard approaches the slaughter in strike position.
BERJAYAWho is this interloper, wonders Slab "n" Ernie?
BERJAYABobby Bigloaf has been pummeled and bruised to near unconsciousness.
BERJAYA
Ernie is outraged. He tells Slab to continue the onslaught, as he takes a step towards the Cartoon celebrity: "Finish the job, Slab! I'll take care of this feathered faggot!"

(I don't condone Ernie's use of hate-words and neither will our knight in shining keratin)


Donald Bastard
to be continued...

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Finally! T Shirts Available!

BERJAYAJimmy FrontSody PopMens BlenDonald BastardGeorge Liquor



Womens Blen
Special girl's cut B and K.

BUY A SHIRT FOR CHRISTMAS!


Hey if you don't see your size but want to order one, please let me know in the comments, so we can take a count and decide whether we need to print more.

We are low on XX large in some designs.