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Mon February 06, 2012
Source     Fark Headline Comments
(Fox News) Interesting Good News: Researchers invent vaccines to prevent heroin, cocaine, and meth addiction. Bad News: It's in Mexico  (latino.foxnews.com) (38)
(NPR) Sad "Institutionalizing juveniles and branding this as criminal behavior rather than dealing with it as normal behavior wrongly places juveniles in places they should not be"  (npr.org) (57)
(Wired) Stupid A handy guide to completing a collection of the most useless, disgusting things ever created by human beings that isn't a Kardashian  (wired.com) (14)
(Some Guy) Asinine It's one thing to steal a microwave, it's another to steal a microwave tower  (myvalleynews.com) (18)
(NPR) Silly Helicopter parents are now following their children from college to the workplace. Say what you will, they're still better than motorboating parents  (npr.org) (68)
(The Hill) Fail Having seen the successes of the past decade, 49% of Americans support bombing Iran to prevent them from gaining nukes  (thehill.com) (184)
(Boston.com) Photoshop Photoshop this idle industrial machine  (inapcache.boston.com) (18)
(Daily Mail) Spiffy Daredevil, who obviously has a death wish, is preparing to break the sound barrier with a leap from the edge of space from 23 miles high, not deploying his parachute until he's 5000 feet from the ground  (dailymail.co.uk) (111)
(CNN) Hero Amtrak to TSA: How about no  (cnn.com) (146)
(Some Guy) Interesting NJ bill would require kids to stay in school until age 18, leaving those who actually graduate when they are 17 in an awkward predicament  (nbcphiladelphia.com) (157)
(News.com.au) Asinine Pop quiz. A woman and baby are being washed away by a flood. What do you do? WHAT DO YOU DO? c) pull out your smart phone and shoot the video  (news.com.au) (160)
(Fox News) Scary While everyone is paying attention to Iran having one of our drones, North Korea actually has several of them in its possession and is reverse-engineering them to make their own drone assault fleet  (foxnews.com) (87)
(wptv.com) Florida Honestly officer, my daughter with cerebral palsy said I could take 40 grand from her special needs account so my son and I could buy trucks  (wptv.com) (46)
(Some Guy) Scary I'm Tom Bodett, and we'll leave cocaine for ya  (wavy.com) (43)
(Some Guy) Strange Garage door openers stop working on entire block at the same time in St. Charles, Missouri. Some say street lights are to blame  (stlouis.cbslocal.com) (63)
(NewsMax) Interesting Iran bank accounts in the US frozen, basically putting them at a zero balance. Those overdraft fees are gonna be murder  (newsmax.com) (42)
(savannah now) Dumbass When at a gun show, don't point a weapon at something you don't intend to shoot. That includes your leg  (savannahnow.com) (150)
(Some Girl) Photoshop Photoshop this 70's sidesaddle  (theseamericans.com) (21)
(Mother Nature Network) Scary The rate of STDs is skyrocketing among sexually active senior citizens. Keep that in mind the next time your Nana wants to give you a kiss  (mnn.com) (86)
(Some CFC) Dumbass Student in trouble for using Old Spice deodorant spray flamethrower to set special ed student on fi...wait, they still have spray deodorant?  (wtsp.com) (115)
(Houston Chronicle) Amusing Randy Travis doing first-person research for a new album  (blog.chron.com) (45)
(Washington Post) Followup That 20 million year old beast slumbering in the lake under the Antarctic? Still slumbering. For now  (washingtonpost.com) (89)
(Some Guy) Interesting District Attorney investigating the goddamn BAT vans  (610wiod.com) (30)
(Some Guy) Strange "The burrito's rightful owner walked up to the men and said he wanted his burrito back"  (kob.com) (85)
(Some Guy) Amusing Sex Week vs. True Love Week, otherwise known as the loose free for all's against the prudes sparks debate on Yale campus  (nbcconnecticut.com) (116)
(Yahoo) Scary Red Rover, Red Rover, let your Sikorsky S-76 come over  (news.yahoo.com) (31)
(Some Guy) Silly Restaurant owner faces $5,000 judgment for starting gay rumor about customer  (wisconsingazette.com) (118)
(Daily Mail) Sappy Madagascar lemurs practicing the martial arts? SHUT DOWN EVERYTHING  (dailymail.co.uk) (37)
(Palm Beach Post) Florida You know your ex is a committed stalker if he wants to win back your heart by kidnapping you using a plan that's so detailed it's 23 pages long, has maps and photos and even a code name: "Operation Stitches"  (palmbeachpost.com) (111)
(Atlanta Journal Constitution) Interesting Police arrest a woman who smelled like alcohol and kept trying to take off her clothes like it's a bad thing  (ajc.com) (47)
(Some Guy) Florida Be on the lookout for the missing Department of Corrections offenders; all 30,000 of them  (610wiod.com) (23)
(Sun Sentinel) Followup Infected cruise ship pulls out of port after being cleaned. Personally, I blame the infection on bad seamen  (sun-sentinel.com) (21)
(Some Cokehead) Florida Protip: Ditch your coke *before* repeatedly dialing 9-1-1 for your chest pains  (wtsp.com) (19)
(Short List) Unlikely FACT: Egyptian kidnappers are better hosts than most of your friends  (shortlist.com) (53)
(The Union Leader) Hero 76 year-old woman launched into a stream after losing control of her snowmobile. According to reports, she may have hurt her wrist. Go Granny  (unionleader.com) (25)
(Some Guy) Florida "I only called that black student 'Chocolate Boy' on hidden camera, while pointing at him because I was handing out candies." Necco, please  (610wiod.com) (159)
(News.com.au) Followup Mushroom-picking family lost for six days in forest describes their balls-tripping ordeal  (news.com.au) (98)
(Chicago Tribune) Unlikely It's the age-old story - man gets stuck in elevator, man gets rescued by fireman and taken into adjoining elevator, man and fireman get stuck in second elevator  (chicagotribune.com) (37)
(Daily Mail) Dumbass "We always get drunk together," says a) a college student about his best friend, b) a bride-to-be about her maid of honor, or c) a mother about her 11-year-old son?  (dailymail.co.uk) (47)
(Washington Post) Obvious Academic experts release 200 page paper showing that online dating doesn't always go well  (washingtonpost.com) (265)
(Sun Sentinel) Florida Man busted for mooning on trolley. King Friday the XIII frowns upon these shenanigans   (weblogs.sun-sentinel.com) (28)
(Brown from the Sun) Photoshop Photoshop these two men and their Munsters  (s3.amazonaws.com) (30)
(News.com.au) Hero Three-year-old defeats claw machine, shares his victory with everyone else at the arcade  (news.com.au) (100)
(Denver Post) Hero Paging Dr. Zaius to the Denver Zoo  (denverpost.com) (47)
(Huffington Post) Scary LEVEL 1 EMERGENCY: Japan's 59% of female respondents aged 16 to 19 said they were uninterested in or averse to sex, a near 12% increase since 2008  (huffingtonpost.com) (509)
(Wikipedia) Survey What movie quote or song lyric best describes you?  (en.wikipedia.org) (540)
(Minneapolis Star Tribune) Unlikely Elderly South Dakota man, driving in fog, accidentally escapes to Minnesota  (startribune.com) (50)


Sun February 05, 2012
(Mental Floss) Sappy Six trees older than human civilization. You submitted this with a "your mom" joke  (mentalfloss.com) (167)
(LA Times) Interesting Kansas City is being torn apart by a chocolate beer. Of course it is  (latimesblogs.latimes.com) (81)
(St. Petersburg Times) Florida Note to wanna-be human traffickers: If you're going to transport five illegal Mexican immigrants in your SUV, always remember to put on a license plate  (tampabay.com) (22)
(Some Guy) Asinine A 9-year-old boy at a Catholic school was suspended Thursday night at a school lip-sync fundraiser after mimicking Michael Jackson's famous groin grab during a rendition of "Billie Jean." That's just nuts  (winonadailynews.com) (98)
(Some " guy) Dumbass If you are going to claim that burglars stole your TV and took it out through a window, it's probably a good idea to take some measurements first  (thisissouthdevon.co.uk) (24)
(The Atlantic) Photoshop Photoshop this goal-oriented guy  (cdn.theatlantic.com) (24)
(Salon) Sick Remember how Obama said that US drone attacks have "not caused a huge number of civilian casualties?" Yeah, turns out they've been targeting rescuers at the scenes of previous attacks. And firing on mourners at funerals  (salon.com) (421)
(Quad City Times) Hero Public school lunchlady demands the deep fryers in the cafeteria be removed so she can force students to eat healthy instead of trusting them to make their own choices  (qctimes.com) (121)
(Wired) PSA How you can hide from Google. If you dare  (howto.wired.com) (88)
(Buzzfeed) Sappy 25 Most awkward cat sleeping positions. Beware of cuteness overload  (buzzfeed.com) (93)
(SLTrib) Scary For all those who have wished Josh Powell would diaf, here ya go  (sltrib.com) (160)
(Some Guy) Interesting Passenger thwarted in his attempt to speed up the Southwest Airlines boarding process  (wbaltv.com) (20)
(Financial Times) Interesting What's worse than being gay in the Bible Belt? Being an atheist  (ft.com) (478)
(Chicago Tribune) Scary When asked why he was drinking beer from a wine glass, this guy didn't know, but he took a stab at it  (chicagotribune.com) (47)
(Daily Mail) Stupid Moderate drinking, which was bad for you, then good for you, then bad for you, then good for you, then bad for you, then good for you, is now bad for you again, doubling your risk of pancreatitis and cancer of the bowel, mouth, throat and neck  (dailymail.co.uk) (61)
(Fox News) Sick From the "Who didn't see this coming?" files: Insurance companies and lawyers screw 9/11 families out of large portions of their entitlements  (foxnews.com) (123)
(Para-Power Ray Gun) Photoshop Photoshop this clay Dr. Quest  (rogerevans.tv) (23)
(ABC) Strange "The power of Christ compels you" apparently works on home intruders, as well  (abcnews.go.com) (59)
(Fark) Advice Bacon - Best prepared via pan fried, baked or microwaved?  (fark.com) (395)
(Daily Mail) Strange Model with 20' waist looks positively freakish  (dailymail.co.uk) (237)
(JSOnline) Obvious Deadbeat homeowner discovered after five years of skipping out on taxes, utilities, lawn care, living  (jsonline.com) (92)
(Fox News) Amusing Enterprising young entrepreneur sells pot brownies to her 8th grade classmates for three dollars per brownie. That's even cheaper than Pepperidge Farms  (foxnews.com) (80)
(Some Guy) Hero Woman receives Facebook friend request from the man who raped her when she was 14 years old. She gets the hero tag for how she handled it  (moxiebird.com) (1151)
(LA Times) Interesting What to do if you are one of the lucky jerks going to the Super Bowl  (latimes.com) (55)
(Boston.com) Cool How cold is it in Europe? Water is freezing and Russians are putting on their underwear (pics)  (boston.com) (94)
(The Sun) Sappy Dogs and cats living together. Next up: mass hysteria  (thesun.co.uk) (29)
(Mirror.co.uk) Amusing New scratch-and-sniff jeans can be worn for months without washing. What's new about that, you ask? These jeans smell like raspberries, not basement damp and Cheetos dust like yours  (mirror.co.uk) (25)
(The Atlantic) Photoshop Photoshop this powder blast  (cdn.theatlantic.com) (23)
(Q2) Scary Pilots say any landing you can walk away from is a good landing--even if you have to walk through the living room and out the front door of the house you crashed into. With pic  (ktvq.com) (50)
(Daily Mail) Interesting Amazing pictures of New York's abandoned leper colony, North Brother Island  (dailymail.co.uk) (120)
(Some Guy) Spiffy Positive side of the bad economy: More and more dry counties are seriously thinking about legalizing the sale of alcohol. "There is nothing good about liquor"  (courier-journal.com) (107)
(Clarion Ledger) Amusing Boy wears "I Heart Boobies" t-shirt to skate party. Then things get weird  (clarionledger.com) (192)
(WTSP) Florida Eight arrested for soliciting undercover male police officers in park include Denny's consultant. Maybe he shouldn't have asked for the "Sausage Slam?"  (wtsp.com) (93)

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