I spent much of today thinking about Andrew Leonard, Katherine Coble, the government, and whether or not I’m slowly converting to libertarianism*. Leonard (as part of my ongoing series–”I read Salon.com so you don’t have to”) is talking about some jackass on his plane who repeatedly complained to the flight crew because he didn’t like [...]
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1. My dad writes a humorous Christmas letter every year and every year he calls me at work to read it to me. Yesterday afternoon, I got to hear this one. The part about me is devoted to the extraordinarily large afghan I’m making. I wish someone–maybe even me–had thought through the problem with having [...]
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Whew, it was cold out there on my walk home! On days like today back when I lived in the little house on Polo Road with Miss J., she would get out a big pot and line the bottom of it with Red Hots and fill it up with apple cider and put it on [...]
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Yeah, so I’m still irritated about this piece of business over at Kleinheider’s*. Feminism is not some monolithic well-articulated philosophy hell-bent on ruining the lives of men**. (That’s just a happy side-effect***.) For me, feminism is about promoting a belief that women have worth, that our experiences are valuable, and that we should have opportunities [...]
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As everyone is well-aware, Kanye West and 50 Cent are having a big feud over President Bush. West, as we remember, famously declared that “George Bush doesn’t care about black people.” Curtis “50 Cent” Jackson then countered that he had no idea what West was talking about, that the hurricane was just God’s way of [...]
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Okay, when something monumental happens, you can sometimes understand why the mainstream media overlooks it, but you expect bloggers to uncover all the important stories. Well, I checked The Bay Area is Talking (sister blog to our lovely Nashville is Talking) and I checked Bruce’s site and it appears I’m going to be the first [...]
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As you may recall, when I graduated from college, I went back to my parents and laid on the couch watching repeats of “In the Heat of the Night” for a month until my mom made it clear that I could not spend the rest of my life dreaming about Bubba Skinner and hoping that [...]
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Some drunk chick rear-ended the Butcher on his way home from work. The Butcher, as you may recall, is driving our only car–my car. My car. The Butcher was fucking magnanimous to that drunk idiot. Yes, when she asked him if they just couldn’t take care of it between them, and he smelled the booze [...]
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There’s no need to do chores when Mrs. Wigglebottom is more than happy to go on a walk. And so, instead of doing the dishes, we went out to see what was going on in the neighborhood. Nothing much. We have a peppering of birds in the sky and someone is being lifeflighted to Vanderbilt, [...]
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I told the Butcher to take the car so that I would be forced to clean the bathroom and do the dishes and do some shit for work. So, I’ve called the Professor and tried to call the Man from GM and I’ve read all the blogs I can think to read and I’ve watched [...]
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If I could have one thing back, I’d want my first car–that gold 77 Caprice Classic–the car we called The Beast. I drove The Beast, most of the boys had Camaros*, except the jackass who had a Grand Am, and the guy who had an old two-toned F150, Shug’s cousin drove a minivan, the snotty [...]
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Y’all, this was really the nicest Thanksgiving I’ve had since the recalcitrant brother got drunk and passed out in the bathtub. Nobody fought. No one cried. No one quietly prayed for death. We sat around and watched a lot of football and ate and just hung out. It was really nice. Maybe this is how [...]
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So, if you’ve been following the gripping tale of Sarcastro’s Thanksgiving, either at his place or at the Boy Scout’s, you might be thinking of the Professor’s comments from the other day–”How’s it go? Alcohol just heightens whatever emotion(s) you are already experiencing.” Well, America, if this is true, we can discern a few things [...]
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The recalcitrant brother had this brilliant idea that a person could create some kind of garbage disposal for showers, that would somehow chop hair into non-clumping bits. The other brilliant idea came up over dinner the other night when I was over at the Professor’s eating meatloaf with some of her 57 lovers. There was [...]
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By the end of the evening, the family was split into three camps who were all very tired of each other: the parents, the kids, and the grandkids. Somehow, the recalcitrant brother convinced my parents to take his kids back to the hotel and the recalcitrant brother stayed here. This was good fun, just the [...]
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One 18 pound turkey stuffed with an apple, an orange, some bay leaves, some poultry seasoning. Would have been delicious if Dad hadn’t insisted that he would not eat it unless we let it cook for another hour after the button popped. Green beans with mushroom soup and fried onion bits. Turned out fine. Sweet [...]
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We’re “watching” the game. The Butcher is watching and about dying of outrage over the officiating, but seems resigned to watching his favorite team lose. I’m working on the current afghan. I’m a little concerned that I may be remembering the recipient of said afghan as being a little broader in the shoulders than humanly [...]
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The Super Genius has one of the most ingenious ideas (hence the name, I suppose) for Thanksgiving, of taking a moment to say something you are not thankful for, just to be contrary. I am not thankful that my parents don’t drink. Not only don’t they drink, they’ve managed to foster some kind of atmosphere [...]
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Honestly, I suspected that any discussion of liberal men would circle back around to Walt Whitman, but instead, we’ve arrived at Mark Twain. Sometimes we’d have that whole river all to ourselves for the longest time. Yonder was the banks and the islands, across the water; and maybe a spark — which was a candle [...]
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When she’s afraid, she hides in the tub. She once had a tick on her belly and I didn’t have any rubbing alcohol or nail polish remover* and so I thought that vodka might do the trick. So, the poor girl laid there on her back in the bathroom while I yanked at a big [...]
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Well, let’s give credit where credit is due: this administration has finally succeeded in bringing together the three major Iraqi ethnic groups and getting them to find some point of agreement. That point? That killing U.S. soldiers isn’t really so bad. Take it away, Salah Nasrawi from the AP: Leaders of Iraq’s sharply divided Shiites, [...]
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Sorry, y’all, I got caught up in the thought of all the conservative blogging men I know enslaved to me and doing all my housework while naked and thus got distracted from the important bits of yesterday’s post on the problems with liberal men. So, I wanted to start out by saying that I think [...]
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Furry Lewis sings “The girl I love, she’s got great long curly hair.” From this, we can deduce one of two things. Either Furry Lewis was a better amateur plumber than I am or his girl washed her hair outside. Because, believe me, once you’ve pulled big wads of my hair out of your bathroom [...]
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The Professor took me to lunch over to Qdoba, which is slowly growing on me, I must confess. She wanted to explain the many ways that having 57 lovers has taxed her lately. Seeing her limping towards me made me slightly concerned that they were taxing her physically as well as psychologically, but it turns [...]
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Come on. Is this not the coolest thing you’ve ever seen? I’d totally wear it walking home from work. I wonder if I could train the tiny cat to sit up there like that…
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