ASYLUM - For all mankind

Thanksgiving Poca-Hotness
The loveliest Native American costumes (COED)

Top 10 Things to Bring on Thanksgiving (Ask Men)

Movies to Turn on During Thanksgiving (Ego TV)

The People Who Will Ruin Your Holiday Dinner (Guyism)

Vodka-Infused Turkey
Gobble, Gobble, Slurrr (The Frisky)
Avoid Being "That Guy" on Thanksgiving
Some helpful anti-d-bag tips (Gunaxin)

Funny Thanksgiving Quotes by Comedians
More than enough material for a joke (Huffington Post)

Our happy hour fact to amaze you drinking buddies with.

Men look more masculine when they tilt their heads back a bit; women look sexier when they look slightly up.

Researchers from the University of Newcastle, Australia, were able to find the facial position for both males and females that optimizes attractiveness. They did so by testing reactions to 3-D computer models of faces, which were presented to subjects at different angles.

Women looking up while men look down mimics the typical height difference between the sexes, so the researchers believe the inherent attractiveness of these postures is rooted in evolution.

Before incorporating this finding into his seduction technique, a fellow would be wise to make sure his nose hair situation is under control.

Every time we're in the airport gift shop and see a partially obscured Playboy on the magazine rack, we think, "Who would have the nerve to read a Playboy on an airplane?"

Now we have an answer: 24-term Michigan Congressman John Conyers, that's who.

An anonymous passenger on a flight between Detroit and Washington, D.C., shot a cell phone video of Conyers checking out some major, glossy-paged boobage, seemingly oblivious to the potentially more delicate sensibilities of the other passengers on the crowded flight.

The images in the video, which is posted below, are probably too small to be considered NSFW.

Sometimes when you break up with your significant other, talking about the experience can make you feel better. More breakups happen just before the holidays than any other time of year, so we thought we'd share a few of our stories to make you feel better when you inevitably get the axe.

Ryan Kwanten, star of HBO's "True Blood" as well as the upcoming film "Red Hill," joined Masterclash to share a horrifying breakup tale that put his very life in danger ...


Click here to subscribe to Masterclash on iTunes

In a just-released video, legendary dish Brooke Shields -- she of the rolling around on that island in "The Blue Lagoon" -- has thrown her support behind one of the candidates for the prestigious "Robert Goulet Memorial Mustached American of the Year" award.

Shields, who remains quite delicious at 45, is asking voters to support fellow thespian Brandon Wardell, who is hoping to claim the Goulet gold.

So get out and VOTE before polls close on Thanksgiving Day, Nov. 25. Because, as Americans, it is our constitutional responsibility. The winner will be crowned at 'Stache Bash 2010, a charitable benefit for Movember, on Dec. 4 at Mike Shannon's Outfield.

Keep reading for Wardell's campaign video, featuring the delectable Shields.

Every kid dreams of becoming an astronaut. But, let's be realistic, most of them ain't gonna make it.

Of course, it's still free to dream. And, if you've got enough coin, you can get out of your dreams and into this life-size replica of the Space Shuttle Discovery.

SpaceToys is selling this non-working 1-to-1-scale model of the famed spacecraft for the low, low price of $2.2 million. It's the perfect stocking stuffer for the man who dreams of space travel and buys his stockings from the same people who made athletic socks for Manute Bol.

The model only replicates the exterior of the space shuttle, but it's incredibly close to the real thing, from the massive, 78-foot wingspan to the tiny bathroom window that allows astronauts to marvel at the majesty of planet Earth as they "recycle their Tang."

The only downside (there's always one when you're trying to buy a fake space shuttle) is that shipping is up to the buyer. We called FedEx to get an estimate on what it would take to ship a 4.5-million-pound spacecraft model. After we were able to convince their freight operator that this was not a prank call, she said that, if we could break down the model into pallets of 220,000 pounds (their maximum shipping weight per pallet), it would cost $14,648,719.32 before taxes to get the whole thing to our house based on NASA's estimated dimensions of the shuttle.

That doesn't include shipping for the gun we would inevitably buy to shoot ourselves as we tried to put it back together again.

We understand the padded bra, and maybe even the butt enhancer, but a cameltoe falsie?

Well, it works as a Funny or Die sketch.

British model and actress Kelly Brook suggestively pitches a cameltoe-enhancing insert that fits straight into a lady's pants -- and does so while saying things like "Puffy Taco" with that fancy English accent of hers.

Read on to check it out.

In the 1990s, staunch critics of video game violence, like then-U.S. Attorney General Janet Reno, were abuzz with the idea that the games' reward system for bloody violence, was turning the nation's youth into skull-bashing hooligans.

Comedy magic duo Penn & Teller responded to Reno's call to make video games that taught children real world skills by coming up with the Sega CD cult classic "Penn and Teller's Smoke and Mirrors."

The unreleased disc included the incredibly useless and uninteresting "Desert Bus," a bus-driving simulator that took place in real time.

The game never hit the shelves, but bootleg copies of the review disc popped up all over the Internet, where the comedy group "Loading Ready Run" discovered the game and turned it into one of the most popular fund-raising efforts on the Web. "Desert Bus for Hope" is an annual gaming telethon that raises thousands of dollars for the children's game charity Child's Play.

LRR co-creator and troupe member Graham Stark talked to Asylum during "Day Four" of the gaming snore-fest about how the annual comedy charity grew its legs, the overwhelming response the telethon has achieved and what it's like to drive eight hours from Tucson, Ariz., to Las Vegas without leaving Victoria, British Columbia.

Holiday feasts are nigh. With them comes the difficult dilemma every man must face: elastic waistband or drawstring?

Much to the delight of your mom, the days of you looking like a slobby gym rat at the dinner table are over -- thanks to Gluttony Pants, the new britches that let you gorge in comfort and class.

With the spirit of sweatpants and the body of classic trousers, Gluttony Pants are made with soft caramel canvas and feature three buttons (embroidered with "Piglet," "Sow" and "Boar"), which allow for the expansion of the waistband with every slab of ham you pack in.

Don't worry about dribbling gravy -- the pants come equipped with a napkin.

And lest you forget what a disgusting porker you are, graphics on the pants' interior depict the life cycle of a glutton -- from birth to death by heart attack.

Gluttony Pants were designed by Betabrand, with the help of chef Chris Cosentino, and unlike your appetite, quantities are limited. Buy yours now for $100, and you'll be able to fashionably pig out for a lifetime. Or until you have to go up a size.

Keep reading for more pics of the overeating slacks that come with everything but the self-loathing.

Showbiz news you actually want, from geek gossip to celeb train-wrecks.

Anne Hathaway is reportedly in talks to play Lois Lane in the Superman reboot. (UGO)

Joss Whedon offered a hilarious statement about the "Buffy" reboot. (FilmDrunk)

Christian Bale confirmed that "The Dark Knight Rises" will be his final Batman movie. (EW)

Cookie Monster wants to host "Saturday Night Live." (PopEater)

Jennifer Grey beat Bristol Palin to be crowned the winner on "Dancing With the Stars." (Radar Online)

Charlie Sheen's text messages to porn star Capri Anderson leaked. (The Blemish)

"Green Lantern" and "Judge Dredd" are some upcoming comic book movies to be thankful for. (Film Critic)

Charles Bronson stars in "Killing Hipsters." (Next Round)

You'll probably like the "Son of the Hulk" just fine when he's angry. (Holy Taco)

In honor of the Viagra comedy "Love and Other Drugs," enjoy the 10 best boner scenes from the movies. (Screen Junkies)

Tom Waits and Pavement are two artists who really need to release albums in 2011. (The Smoking Jacket)