Salon has a big scoop today in the room where they make war: While Sarah Palin was chatting with a reporter or someone after her speech in Reno this past weekend, she totally autographed an American flag that was handed to her with a Sharpie! The Boy Scouts at Salon take their flags very seriously, so they know that this is a “desecration” that breaks the Flag Code. Oh good! That surely disqualifies her from the presidency, so we can stop talking about her. (Just kidding, your Wonkette will still blog about her, every day, for the pageviewz.) Meanwhile, at Team Sarah, where they don’t read such “opposition media,” somebody posted photos of Sarah Palin making out with a female dog at this same event, which everyone at Team Sarah thinks is sooooo cute / sexy. Same-sex bestiality is much more important than the flag thing anyway. And more illegal.
Oh, according to the Team Sarah post, Sarah Palin also signed the dog. The lesson here is that Sarah Palin will sign anything, so one of us should show up to a rally with paperwork requiring her to donate all proceeds from her next book to the “GZ Mosk” and get her to sign it.
And here are your gross Team Sarah commenters fantasizing about being that dog Sarah Palin hooked up with:
Nothing says “I’m sane and do not want to freak you out” like barking at Sarah Palin. We would do that too, probably.
Oh, let’s post that photo of Palin making out with the dog again so it’s in your sex dream tonight.
There you are. [Salon/Team Sarah]
{ 122 comments… read them below or add one }
Are you sure mama grizzly isn't barfing up a wolf pup she ate for lunch.
Lordy, so many bitch jokes, so little time.
One is a bitch…the other is just a puppy.
She forgot to make out with the flag before signing it.
I'm sure it happened.
She undoubtedly wears flag undergarments (paid for by the GOP) which she has further desecrated by writing helpful reminders to whoever happens to be reading them:
- "use tongue"
- "no biting"
- "tax cuts are good"
It's OK, Sarah washes her asshole with her tongue too, also.
Todd's a lucky man.
Perfect
Sarah Palin tosses a mean word salad.
Carl Paladino's gonna email that money shot to all his friends
log me in
now where the heck is PETA when you need them? If this isn't a case of animal abuse, I don't know what is.
Bob Barker is rolling over in his grave.
GOOD BOY!
She fucking scrawled her XX mark signature on a puppy? I'm torn between feeling sorry for it and hoping dies from ink poisoning (or some such shit) and having the dog krazees of 'Murka erupt in outrage.
Photographic proof: Sarah Palin sucks the blood from puppies.
I wouldn't kiss that, … and I eat my own poop.
And the dog, too.
Jeez, she's closing her eyes and everything.
Looks like a French kiss, se rouler un patin avec un chien.
ou plutôt une CHIENNE, if you know what i mean…
Well with two of them it was truly bitchin'.
I'm Carl Paladino and I approved this bitch on bitch action.
supposedly matt and trey spent some portion of their misspent early relationship farting on celebrities.
that might be fun here.
Barking on command? Or Spontaneously?
And how long are the spikes on the collar?
Puppy? She thought it was Todd!
she autographed the flag?? TREASON11!!!
or maybe it was a misunderstanding. the only flags she recognizes are those of alaska (which she betrayed) and russia (she can see the flag from her house).
I was going to say, isn't Bible Spice scrawling her X on a flag a violation of the Flag Desecration Amendment that the wingnuts tried to get passed?
it's a slashing at the memory of every man and woman who has died fighting for the good things that flag stands for. it's not like burning the flag in political protest, an action which i do not agree with people doing but i do understand it. a political protest which damages the national flag at least has a social point that transcends the individual action. autographing the national flag is a thoughtless, egotistical action taken by a shallow-pated bimbo self-hypnotized by gazing into the mirror. that person truly has no shame, and her acolytes have no sense.
Reminds me f a joke:
Why does a dog lick its balls?
Because it can.
you just know the dog is gonna spend the rest of the month dribbling piss on it's own belly to remove the mark of the beast. it might be harder if it's a girl dog tho…
Hotter than that scene in Splice.
This scene should be edited right on to the end of that gut-wrenching Sarah Maclachlan commercial. PETA should have drenched her ass in Benjamin Moore for that shit.
Dr. Do Little, also.
Where is PETA or Animal Cops when you need them? Palin and the owner should be arrested for Animal Cruelty!
We may now know the identity of the fellator of the WashPo Furry!
"Oh my gorsh! If this signed American flag is in here the puppy's kennel, then what in heaven's name did I run up the flagpole this morning?!"
Lucky dog. That's prime Poopin on Palin range.
Sarah promptly renamed the puppy from Sophie to Dartboard.
Look again–the dog's name is Sohpie, which is probably how it felt after that wet kiss.
Will she kiss my pet snake too?
Did the dog see little starbursts ricocheting around her living room afterward?
This is what talking about gay marriage has done to this country.
If I ever meet Sarah, I'll start barking
If I ever meet Sarah, I'll bite her in the face.
If I ever meet Sarah, I'll start barfing.
I have a really good hairball saved up.
Did the hockey mom not want to get lipstick on its collar?
Lucky that pup doesn't live in Illnois. Our Rethuglican candidate for governor would put it in a gas chamber. Sorry, out of snark.
I actually am having trouble believing she signed the dog. Signed.. a dog? Screw the flag thing or swapping spit with Spot, that is the most fucked aspect of this.
Why's that so hard to believe? I sign the dog all the time. Usually not in public, but then again, I'm not an exhibitionist and probably couldn't get it up in that crowd.
You mean to tell me that no one's ever asked you for your John Hancocker Spaniel?
I think 'team sarah' is the special needs team.
Who the fuck names their dog "Sohpie?" Is that some new-millenium weird spelling for "Soapy?" How the hell do you pronounce that? Soap-eye?
I think it may be a misspelling for Sophie.
Teabonics
Two guys see a dog licking his balls. One says "I wish I could do that". The other replied "You better pet him first."
That's how you eat oysters, not dog. It's going to take forever to slurp the innards out of that thing. Oh well. I hope there's audio of her trying.
In the next photo the dog is humping her nose.
Rick Santorum would be rolling in his grave if only he were dead.
If only … /sigh/
Does she sign boobies? I would like to see her sign Meghan's.
Well here in unreal America, I will not give Sarah a pass for pratically spitting in the face of our brave U.S. American troops by desecrating the flag they are fighting to protect.
I was excited when I saw the picture of the cute dog but got depressed when I saw it was a story about nobody.
Next thing you know, she's gonna be making out with some lazy black welfare dog, and doncha know, she's gonna be faced with being that dog's baby-mama. Or….will she have to make that terrible choice??? This'll wreck her presidential aspirations, but it'll make a heckuva reality teevee show.
Okay, you asked for it:
An Iconic Representation of a Pitbull's Love for a Portuguese Water Dog Puppy
Well there you go. Wonder if former Virginia Beach GOP Chairman David Bartholomew could be duped into getting the rumor going with an "accidental" mass email?
LEAVE TRIG ALONE!!1! And such, also, too.
The dog is the next Tea Party candidate.
Might as well run the smart one for office.
Yeah, and the dimocrat would lose by 20% instead of just 10%.
November 2nd,let the recovery begin.
So THAT'S how Sarah Palin contracted hookworms.
So many possibilities, so little time:
1) Which one is Palin?
2) I guess she is trying to be the anti-O'Donnell.
3) Can she see Carl Paladino from her window?
4) Immediately afterwards, the dog went and got knocked up by a local hockey player.
5) Palin moved on to dogs from babies because babies are all up-in-your-face with their book learnin'.
6) Where is Joe Miller with the handcuffs when you need him?
7) Strangely, that is how John McCain got through his years at the Hanoi Hilton.
How can you tell Sarah Palin from an annoying little bitch? Lipstick.
9) It's only flag desecration when liberals do it.
10) And so the torch is passed to the next Republican Vice Presidential Candidate.
#5 Yeah they are like "My Pet Goat" is for realz!
10) Tom Tommorow "This Modern World" in an alternate universe a small cute dog is elected President. Don't give the Tea tards any ideas.
I regret that I can give but one thumb up for these excellent lines.
I vote for five, but four is pretty special, too.
Well I guess you don't need the rest of us, since you can so easily service yourself!
I just creeped the hell out of myself with my previous comment. This whole post is pretty damn gross. Funny and gross.
She was right. Lipstick was the only difference I noticed.
That is the best line on this thread except for the two guys who see a dog licking his balls one.
I believe the only remedy is to burn both of them.
Sarah and the flag I hope?
SP could get away with wearing a Waffen SS uniform because she'd look "cute."
You have to pay extra for her to wear the uniform.
No tounges!
No, tounges!
Closed eyes. Open mouth. Firm grip with both hands.
They sure do know how to kiss in Alaska.
Sticking her tongue down the throat of a little puppy while playing with its ass is the LEAST disgusting thing Palin has done in the past month.
Throckmorton?
Spay and neuter that bitch! And the dog she's making out with, too. Also
This is clearly a case of oral spaying, which is how the wemminfolk do it in Alaska.
Bob Barker: Boner.
This probably has something to do with her biological time clock and I think I just made myself a little sick.
In Reals amerika both the kiss and the flag signing are capital crimes, also.
Lucky dog. She usually shoots them from a helicopter. It's hard to tell them from wolves when you're cruising along, high on meth.
Sorry for my similar joke. They used up all the bitch jokes on the first page.
I know. When you get this far down, the pickens are pretty Slim.
If she's not tongue'n them, she's shooting them from sky machines.
Okay, was it spelled Sohpie before or after Sarah tattooed it (in Sharpie? in blood?)…?
Apparently I can only thumbs-up a comment once.
P.S. Did anyone ever figure out what you can spend your penis points on?
~
Also and do we get to watch this on Bestiality.com?
I have it on good authority that that puppy is infected with hydrophobia. It's only a matter of time, now…
I sure hope the bitch was given a de-worming after the makeout session. Palin's a lost cause, but little Sohpie may make it.
Oh my gawd she sucked his fvcking brains out!!!!
~
Sarah Palin is making out with a female dog. It stands to reason, then, that Sarah Palin is a lesbian.
Put it on a chalkboard and I'll be convinced.
I have an ass I'd like her kiss.
Wash your nose first.
It's got a better chance of becoming a successful adult than her own youngest pup.
Damn, Sohpie's frozen carcass is on ebay.
What the hell is she doing writing on the Flag? What is she a republiscum teahadist? Why do 'those kinds' of people always get away with fucking the dog?
dog says: "i lick the asses of other dogs, and i think this is gross."
In the sixties, the same kind of people wanted to throw us in the pokey for sewing flags on the asses of our jeans.
Christine O'Donnell is jealous of that bitch.
Sophie got more love and attention from Mama G in 30 seconds than Trig has in his life….
That may be a slight overstatement, but points out a truth.
1. Despite the fact that my military service was brief, long ago, and non-combat, I am still one of those old assholes who stands to attention and puts his hand over his heart when the flag passes, or at the singing of the anthem at a sporting event. I also glare at those who aren't paying attention, which has mixed results.
2. Despite (1) above, I also believe that the flag is just a symbol, and that it cannot, therefore, be "desecrated", because it isn't "sacred" in the first place.
3. Politicians who deplore "flag abuse", but who then abuse flag etiquette for promos, are obvious low-hanging fruits.
4. Babble Spice routinely violates flag etiquette for promotional purposes. But, weirdly, I cannot call to mind occasions where she has railed about flag abuse (unlike, e.g., the senior Senator from Cali, who pisses me off about this).
5. Therefore, I can criticize the Fame-Whore of Babble-On for her routine abuse of flag etiquette, but I cannot call her a hypocrite on this matter. Of course, I can call her a hypocrite on several other issues, as well as calling her a con-artist cunt. But that's just life.
Always nice to see a totally bugfuck-insane celebretard trying way too hard to be ordinary.
Work it, girl!
sashay shante !!
Sarah: "That was better than Todd".
Dog: "That was worse than peanut butter".
The dog is named Sohpie? Or they misspelled Sophie? Because if it is the latter, I have to rename my dog.
"Endorsing," not signing.
In the future, please make your flags and dogs out to "cash."
Obama should sign a flag just to see what these Americunts would say.
I knew there was a reason I liked cats better.
Sarah's just feeding the dog like she feeds those little baby birdies: just barf in the mouth. And saying this made me barf in my mouth thinking about Sarah barf.