These cute birdcages were only one dollar each. What should I do with them?
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These cute birdcages were only one dollar each. What should I do with them?
The second season of WKUK has some of my favorite sketches in it, like: “Fart Dinner” and OK, I’ll stop before I list the whole dang season. I probably don’t need to say this, but these are mostly NSFW. Well, pretty much entirely NSFW. Surprisingly, “Happier With Your Mouth Open” is the cleanest one.
I think, although I would not bet cold hard cash on it, that today was the first time I’d ever seen the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile in person. Although I guess I shouldn’t say THE Wienermobile, because according to the Hotdoggers (that’s what they call their drivers) blog, there are six in the U.S. Not counting this hilarious and vaguely inappropriate also-ran:
MOTH BALL! HAHAHA
The photos I took of this lovely lady (handsome man?) with my Canon S5 were just as good as this one with my phone, which made me sad for my S5. And for myself, because maybe the actual problem is that I could use some lessons on using a real camera. Tonight, I went all Martha Stewart in the kitchen and cooked just about every fresh vegetable I had in the house. The oven was a roasting MACHINE. (Yes, Kerry. Yes, an oven is indeed a roasting machine.) And the veggies turned out alright, but lackluster. I also pan-fried some tilapia in a mustard-mayo-panko breading, and that was pretty boss before it fell apart in the pan. Anyway, I might not be the best cook in the world, but I am definitely the best mess maker in the house. (PS: trying and failing to repair a dishwasher with standing pond water in the bottom of it, a load’s worth of dirty dishes in one half of the sink and four inches of nastier pond water in the other half of the sink can suck a million dicks in hell forever*.)
But a lot to do with something that labored very hard for me for a long time.
I’ve had this phone for the last six years, and you can tell its age by its chipped paint. It endured much. I dropped this sucker a billion times, and even if it exploded into parts on the sidewalk, I just picked it up, smashed it back together and went on my merry way. For most of our time together, it had great reception (except in Overton Square), great portability (screw your fancy cases!) and great resilience (did I mention the thing about dropping it on the sidewalk a billion times?). And the entire time, “I Put A Spell On You” by Screamin’ Jay Hawkins was my ringtone. (Now my ringtone is the “Double Rainbow” song, which is pretty much the only song that could have rivaled “I Put A Spell On You” in complete obnoxiousness and badassery.) So despite all the bells and whistles of the new smartypantsphone, I will miss this old tank. AND! As of now, I’m using both phones (like a pimp) because my phone number’s not switched over. So my adventures with this beast may not be over yet. I couldn’t fit everyone in the photo so I drew them in. THEY ARE SO LIFELIKE
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