Paperback 359: The Drowner / John D. MacDonald (Gold Medal k1302)

Paperback 359: Gold Medal k1302 (PBO, 1963)

Title: The Drowner
Author: John D. MacDonald
Cover artist: Stanley Zuckerberg

Yours for: $25


Best things about this cover:

• Lesson: brackish, green water—not for swimming.
• Fantastically creepy cover. That dude pulling her down must have one powerful set of lungs. or SCUBA equipment.
• Love the bubbles—nice touch to make sure they're coming from him (I assume it's a "him") as well as her. Also love the way the words cascade down the side of her struggling body. Accentuates the scary verticality of the whole cover.

Best things about this back cover:

• This I like less.
• Without the struggling lady to complement them, the vertically arranged words here just look stupid and purposeless.

Page 123~

If the fork hesitated on its way to the healthy mouth, it was a faltering so minor he was unable to detect it. But she looked considerably less friendly.

~RP

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Paperback 348: River Queen / Charles N. Heckelmann (Graphic Giant G-221)

Paperback 348: Graphic Giant G-221 (2nd ptg, 1957)

Title: River Queen
Author: Charles N. Heckelmann
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: $6


Best things about this cover:

• That's up there with the most maniacal expressions I've ever seen on these covers
• Either his upper body is way out of proportion to his lower body, or that is one blousey top
• Look at his right pinky—it's like he's holding a cup of tea
• Her boobs are going to come out of that dress in 5, 4, 3 ...
• Fear hand!
• "Rawhide II: Rawhider!"
• "War and Love on the Mighty ... Missouri?" Really? I'm sure it's a fine river, but it feels like carob to the Mississippi's chocolate, i.e. a poor substitute
• "Heckelmann?" Really?

Best things about this back cover:

• That boat explosion looks like it was drawn by a child—a child who has no concept of how things explode. I mean, the boat appears to be utterly intact. The explosion lines are comically straight and debris-free. The explosion *does* appear to have catapulted those two fighting guys high into the air—that's *pretty* realistic.
• "Indian-proof," HA ha. Wonder what SPF that is.
• "Hey, baby, mind if I battle my way up your flaming shores...?"

Here's the title page illustration:


Page 123~

The flag whipped jauntily in the stiff, morning breeze.

That comma is super ridiculous.

~RP

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Paperback 332: The Cruel Dawn / Alfred Viazzi (Popular Library 440)

Paperback 332: Popular Library 440 (1st ptg, 1952)

Title: The Cruel Dawn
Author: Alfred Viazzi
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: $14


Best things about this cover:

• "I said, I'm gonna wash that gray right out of your hair! Hold still!"
• "Demon, I cast thee out!"
• Gloria liked to end every dance with a vicious take-down.
• Normally I find things like garter belts and cleavage quite hot, but between the dowdiness of that nightgown and the oddly porcelain quality of this woman's skin, this lady just isn't doing it for me. Also, maybe it's just me, but she seems a bit standoffish.

Best things about this back cover:

• Her body is blonde? That's more info than you usually get in an opening description.
• Oooh, a "lusty bordello." Not one of those Puritanical bordellos you see from time to time. Those are sooo annoying.
• A decent, non-wanton actress would, of course, have taken the time to get properly dressed before shielding a man with her body. Pfft. Whore.

Page 123~

The last thing he remembered was the thud and pain of a boot kicking hard into the side of his head.

~RP

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57 Books from the University Book Sale: Book 47

Title: Reno Rendezvous (Popular 60-2119, 1st ptg, 1967)
Author: Leslie Ford (last one, I swear)
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: $7

• Kinky.
• I like how the accidental abrasions on her mouth make her look like a vampire.
• "Thinking about divorce? ... Think Again!" — that should have been the tagline.
• From the neck (*just* below the rope) down, this woman is hot.
• I wish this artist got credit. I'd like to know the name behind this painter with a predilection for neck-snapping. I'll just call him "Snappy." See also...

And the back of "Reno Rendezvous" ...

• "A flying visit to Reno.." — why does that phrasing sound off?
• I wouldn't worry about the "shadow of a noose." I'd worry about the actual noose. That one. There. Around your neck.

Page 123~

She raised her eyes to his, round and blue as delft saucers.

Not so much sexy as comically cartoonish. "You remind me of this anime I saw once..."

~RP

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57 Books from the University Book Sale: Book 41

Title: Catch a Killer (PB 940, 1st ptg, '53)
Author: Ursula Curtiss
Cover artist: James Meese

Yours for: $5

• "Don't go in there! My Beanie Baby collection is in there! NO ONE GOES IN THERE!"
• When Jim asks for "lemon," you better give him lemon and not fucking canary if you want to live to see another day.
• "Murder? Again? But we had murder yesterday, and the day before that. I'm sick of murder. I want fishsticks."
• I'm worried about her fingers.
• Fear hand!

• OK, this is the worst reprise of a front cover Ever. Now he just looks like a staggering drunk who's got a door glued to his palm.
• "Jap!" How racist earthy!
  
• It is a little known fact that kangaroo babies are hatched from gigantic red spheres.

Page 123~

Sentry turned his head fractionally so that he met Cy's eyes, steady, probing, in a waiting face that now held no easy good humor at all.

I wish there were a "Horrible Adverb" contest I could enter "fractionally" in. Yeesh.

~RP

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57 Books from the University Book Sale: Book 39

Title: The Deadly Climate — Pocket Books 1077 (1st ptg, 1955)
Author: Ursula Curtiss
Cover artist: James Meese

Yours for: $5

• "Dear god, no! That pillow's not hypoallergmmphrrrmmmph!"
• This is some damn great cover art and design. Great action, great use of white space, and possibly the biggest eyeballs I've ever seen on a cover girl. Amazing.

• "Two steps less?" Not "fewer?"
• "Unbelieving eyes stared back at her. No one wanted to believe..." Yeah, that's generally what UNBELIEVING means, Shakespeare.
• What the hell is "Shock — exposure" supposed to mean? Is that like "Stop! ... Hammertime!"?

Page 123~

Trunz took a sharp curve and inquired elaborately, "Want the siren?"

Does "elaborate" have a definition I'm not aware of? One that means The Exact Opposite of "elaborate," maybe?

~RP

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57 Books from the University Book Sale: Book 4

Title: Stairway to an Empty Room (Popular Library, undated — early/mid-60s)

Author: Dolores Hitchens

Cover artist: uncredited

Yours for: best offer

• Oh, snap!
• Stairway to a massive car interior
• His left hand is Disgusting — like the claw of some mythical, horrifying sea creature
• "They said 'just lift the neck' ... why ain't there no candy comin' out! What good's a life-sized Pez dispenser if it don't put out!?"
• Dolores Hitchens is actually a pretty good writer

• One-armed, bow-legged spy with wide, rectangular wang = interesting logo choice
• "Expertly tautened!" — next time I see a pair of high, firm breasts, I'll know what to say

Page 123~

Biddy's fingers writhed inside Monica's. The hot eyes were frightened and unsure. "You let me alone. You get out of here."

If only that first sentence read "Biddy's fingers writhed inside Monica" — I might be inclined to read it.

~RP

Paperback 294: Lady in Peril / Ben Ames Williams (Popular Library 164)

Paperback 294: Popular Library 164 (1st ptg, 1948)

Title: Lady in Peril
Author: Ben Ames Williams
Cover artist: Rudolph Belarski

Yours for: $23

It's "LADY IN PERIL" week at "Pop Sensation" — three early Popular Library covers all featuring ... yes, you guessed it, LADIES IN PERIL. First up, "LADY IN PERIL" —


Best things about this cover:

• "I'll be back in five minutes, I swear!"
• You have to be superhot to pull off wearing that much of that color. This lady (in peril) succeeds. Dress alone = OK, but dress + long gloves = wow.
• This cover rules and Rudolph Belarski was a pulp art genius. Such great lurid action. Just the idea of a lady dressed like this trying to escape out of what appears to be at least a second-story window — that's enough to convince me that peril is for real.
• Hand-on-wrist action right in the dead center of the cover, combined with the vividness of her splayed, aqua hand, really creates a sense of immediacy here.
• Her hair is fancy, her horrified expression believable, her rack exquisite.

Best things about this back cover:

• Inspector Tope, HA ha. That character writes itself. Not enough fall-down-drunk detectives in the crime fiction canon for my tastes.
• The sentence that begins "During..." is so convoluted that it makes me want to shoot myself, others.

Page 123~

And it was only when her back was turned that he realized she wore over her nightgown a negligee of metal cloth, bright as silver. This was Lola Cyr!

When are metal negligees going to make their comeback? I like a lady who's not afraid to wear chain mail to bed.

~RP

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Paperback 247: Terror in the Streets / Howard Whitman (Bantam A964)

Paperback 247: Bantam A964 (1st ptg, 1952)

Title: Terror in the Streets
Author: Howard Whitman
Cover artist: Robert Maguire

Yours for: $10


Best thing about this cover:

• Ah, 1950s paranoia at its finest
• Can't a pretty girl get a haircut at 1 a.m. without being team-stalked by tough guys in olive drab suits anymore? What a world ...
• Guns 'n' Roses' "Welcome to the Jungle" was based on this book cover
• Maguire would eventually learn his lesson: Put Girl In Foreground!

Best things about this back cover:

• You can tell even from this crowded array of scenes that Maguire is a masterful illustrator. Great faces, action, use of light...
• Love the action in the alley by the garbage cans. Smacked his fedora off with a blackjack. That's about as 50s as 50s violence gets. Fedora still in mid-air. Rich.
• Every quote reads like it's coming out of the mouth of Maude Flanders: "Won't somebody please think of the children!?"

Page 123~

The police are hardly interested in, nor would the average police mentality be capable of understanding, such psycho-dynamics. Police are interested in end-results. When an old homosexual is found dead in his hotel room after picking up a man at a bar, the police just put it down as a "fag murder" and go on from there.

~RP

Paperback 239: The Lady Kills / Bruno Fischer (Gold Medal 148)

Paperback 239: Gold Medal 148 (PBO, 1951)
Title: The Lady Kills
Author: Bruno Fischer
Cover artist: uncredited

Yours for: $30


Best things about this cover:

• Sometimes, you just have to stop and recognize awesomeness when you see it. This cover is everything I love about vintage paperbacks in one beautiful package: a paperback original from a very good author, in beautiful condition ... a girl with a gun and a guy with a whip ... a dynamic composition with cool depth of field perspective ... shredded clothing ... a title that is also a complete sentence. My only response when I pulled this off my shelf was "Damn, that's good."
• That's some serious violence; he seems to have @#$ed her up good with that whip, despite the fact that he's holding it in a way that would not be conducive to hurting someone. He's gotta let go of the tip. It's like threatening someone with a gun that has the safety on. Looks cool, though.
• She looks a little like that actress ... what's her name ... star of "Medium" ... like a young version of her ... Patricia Arquette? Is that right?

Best things about this back cover:

• "Old Cleave" = great name for an axe murderer
• This copy is nuts. Makes almost no sense. Is Old Cleave her father? Her husband? What is the "it" in the penultimate sentence? Did our narrator literally see Beth's husband "learn the truth." How exciting, watching someone learn something.
• "Understood least of all" — yes, that's clear

Page 123~

My laughter had broken through the crust of her where words couldn't.

I love a girl with a good graham cracker crust.

Now I'm hungry.

~RP

Paperback 205: Third Ward, Newark / Curtis Lucas (Lion Books 80)

Paperback 205: Lion Books 80 (1st ptg, 1952)

Title: Third Ward, Newark
Author: Curtis Lucas
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: SOLD (3/12/09)


Best things about this cover:

• "Oh, U.S. 1, please don't leave me! I love you so much! You're the only .... one. For me."
• "... the jolt of her life!"??? Way to make a brutal rape sound like a caffeine high. Jeez.
• If those are her assailants, they're not fleeing very well. "Hurry, let's ... damn! My contact lens! Hang on, Pete."

Best things about this back cover:

• "Wonnie?" Really. That's almost as bad as "Mihie." Is naming characters really That challenging?
• Revenge! Sweet, now I want to read this. I hope it is less brutal than "I Spit On Your Grave," which I never saw, but just hearing about it made me kind of sick.
  
• She "ripened" on "filthy" "pavements." Like all the finest fruit. What an endearing portrayal of your heroine.
  
• "I'm sorry, honey, but I just can't sleep in such a comically small bed. There, there. Let's get out of the kid's furniture section and see what we can find."

Page 123~

Wonnie came back from the kitchen and sat beside Joe. "I'm gonna work here every night, Joe. I'm gonna cook all the corn bread and biscuits, and I'll cook greens with real seasoning in them. In a little while that white man over in the diner will lose all his customers to us."

Worst. Revenge. Ever.

~RP

Paperback 143: Double, Double / Ellery Queen (Pocket Books 874)

Paperback 143: Pocket Books 874 (1st ptg, 1952)

Title: Double, Double
Author: Ellery Queen
Cover artist: Tom Dunn

Yours for: $10


Best things about this cover:

• Betty's audition for Macbeth was cut violently short...
• Betty's voracious appetite for men's hands knew no limits...
• Extreme Chiropractics!
• Honestly, this is one of the most vivid and memorable covers in my collection. I want to read the book just to figure out what he's doing to her (or vice versa)

Best things about this back cover:

• Super pastel rectangles. Love them.
• "Town Hermit" - is that an official position? It's capitalized!
• There is a "little" too much use of "scare" quotes on this back "cover.
• It seems a little odd that the selling point of this mystery is that it includes SEVEN murders (arbitrary?) and that there were NO CLUES - what the hell does "Double, Double" have to do with anything? This should have been called "Seven Murders, No Clues"

Page 123~

Now the last lingering bong was gone and Dakin was his proper hatchet self again, and Ellery said, "So," like little Hercule Poirot, and he went over and shut one of the windows, shivering.

This may be my favorite "Page 123" sentence ever, if only for "the last lingering bong."

~RP

Paperback 116: The Dain Curse / Dashiell Hammett (Pocket Books 295)

Paperback 116: Pocket Books 295 (1st ptg, 1945)

Title: The Dain Curse
Author: Dashiell Hammett
Cover artist: sadly, uncredited

Yours for: $10


Best things about this cover:

• "Demons, I cast thee out!"
• Where did her pupils go?
• This is the rare "beheading" cover (I'm kidding - though her head does look like it was photo-shopped, badly, onto her torso)
• I think her head has snapped back in revulsion from her assailant's fetid odor. That may explain the disappearing pupils as well.
• I do like how he knocks her head so hard it goes out of frame.

Best things about this back cover:

• "... and you're cursed with your mother's blood on your hands in babyhood" - aside from being enigmatic and disturbing ... "Babyhood?" Is that a word? Sounds like a good title for a talking babies movie starring at least one of the Wayans Brothers and, oh, let's say Ice Cube. It'll be like "Baby Geniuses," only ... blacker.
• This may be the first book I've posted to feature the wartime exhortation to the reader to mail the book to a serviceman overseas. Very cool historical marking.

Page 123~

It was postmarked San Francisco, nine o'clock Saturday morning. Inside was a soiled and crookedly torn piece of brown wrapping paper, with one sentence - as poorly printed with pencil as the address - on it: "Any body that wants Mrs. Carter can have same by paying $10000-----" There was no date, no salutation, no signature.

~RP

Paperback 90: The Hot Diary (Howard J. Olmsted) / Ring Around a Rogue (J. M. Flynn) (Ace Double D-459)

Paperback 90: Ace Double D-459 (PBO 1960 / PBO 1960)

Title: The Hot Diary / Ring Around a Rogue
Author: Howard J. Olmsted / J.M. Flynn
Cover artist: uncredited / uncredited

Yours for: SOLD (early May 2008)


Best things about this cover:

• Don't make Robert Stack angry. You wouldn't like Robert Stack when he's angry
• This cover is great - quintessential hard-boiled with a mod style (again, love pink in my hard-boiled covers). They are both dressed impeccably. Her dress is fierce (love the black accents, especially the band and bow toward the hemline), and he carries off a trench-coat way better than most dopey goons.
• Does this count as "bondage?" I'm counting it. I imagine that her hands are tied. That, or she lost her right arm in the war or a freak fishing accident.
• "Never Write About Murder" - uh ... you just did.

PAGE 23~

I wouldn't have minded if she'd slapped me or swore at me. But her calm, unmoved acceptance of the kiss frosted me. It hit me where I lived, in my pride.

Best things about this cover:

• These two covers make a nice pair: "Things To Do With a Girl When You're Armed": "You can grab her like this ... or kiss her like this ... it's up to you."
• Here's a sexless sex scene if I've ever seen one. He looks ... wooden. "Let's see, I put my gun ... here, and my left hand reaches around like ... so. OK. What do I do with my lips again?" Etc.
• The painting here does nothing to up the eros. The paint looks hastily daubed on. She has that horrid bottle-blond rubbery head look (see the "Finger Man" cover), and rarely have I been so unmoved by so much female skin.
• "A Car, A Girl and A Gun" - or "Copywriter Gives Up, Decides Life's Meaningless" - that's him there, plummeting over that cliff in the car.

PAGE 123~

Deal grabbed him by the shirt front, yanked him from the sofa, and backhanded the expressionless face. Blood trickled from the corner of the flat lips but Chiong did not cry out.

~RP