BEAing and Nothingness

Diet Coke Plus works wonders. I left at 7 a.m. scooped up McGoran, then Pettit, and more or less rocketed up the NJ Turnpike. I hit the Lincoln Tunnel (a.k.a., the Mouth of Hell) by something like 8:40 a.m. Parking was a little tough, though. We found a cheap place at 35th and 9th Avenue that featured huge metal frames to stack cars. But it was a bit of walk to the Javits Center. Poor McGoran had to carry a box of Body Traces. Pettit would have offered to help, but instead he chose to power-smoke eighteen cigarettes in a row. And I was busy, like... checking out the city, or something. (Sorry, Jon!)

My 10:30 signing at the MWA booth was fantastic. There was a steady stream of people eager to pick up their Severance Package; next to me, Megan Abbott was signing a serious number of Queenpins. Thanks to everyone who stopped by, but especially Regina Barnes at The Toadstool Bookshop in New Hampshire (who totally made my day), Paul Lutz at Dead End Books in Long Island, Charles Spataro at Nothing Like a Good Book, Bobby McCue from the Mystery Bookstore in L.A., and Greg Gillespie from Port Richmond Books in good ol' Philly.

Afterward I hit the floor a bit with David Hale Smith, headmaster of the DHS Galaxy of Stars. Wait. That makes it sound like we danced. We totally didn't dance. However, as I walked DHS to his taxi, we did discuss Brazilian waxing techniques. Make of that what you will.

I also stopped by the Quirk Books booth, where they had a nice display of The Crimes of Dr. Watson. No, the book isn't published yet; on display were something called "blads" that contained a few sample pages within the real covers. And let me tell you, the cover is pretty damn wild. Just wait until you run your fingers over one.

My only complaint about BEA: the heat. Goddamn was it H-O-T-T in there. At times, it felt like I was wandering a sandy beach, looking for a place to drop my gear and collapse. The only guaranteed cool spot was in the men's room, where the AC was blasting, for some odd reason. However, if you hang in the men's room too long, they usually call security.

Before I knew it, I had lost six pounds of water and it was time to drive back to Philly. The walk back to the parking lot was long. And uphill. Oh, and it was 95 degrees and humid. We still didn't offer to help McGoran carry anything. Oh, how we suck.

Ungodly

I'm up at this ungodly hour on a Saturday morning because I'm trying to drink enough Diet Coke Plus (now with vitamins and minerals!) to become alert enough to operate a motor vehicle and drive it to New York City for BookExpo America. Diet Coke Plus is interesting; tastes just like the Diet Coke I know and love (and drink every morning, because Swierczy doesn't do coffee) with absolutely no side effects whatsoever except my heart racing a little more quickly and oh did I mention that Jon McGoran (a.k.a. D.H. Dublin) will be joining me for the ride as well as Ed "Hardcore Book Nerd" Pettit so that's why I have to leave soon because i'm picking them up first before headed to the turnpike and then to new york city where I have to find parking my god hope i'm not late because itll be just like that dream i had once where i was late for my own brain surgery and all of the surgeons stood there and pointed and laughed and laughedandlaughedandlaughed and then the guy with the bonesaw said okay funs over lets get this guys skullcracked and i freakedand said the onlything that came to mind: how do you like your blue eyed boy now mr death...

Wow. Diet Coke Plus. Swierczy says: Thumbs up!

Mail Today...

... was pretty fucking awesome. St. Martin's sent me two packages: one contained a handful of Severance Package ARCs. This will be my tenth book (six nonfiction titles and three novels precede it), but I'm telling you, the thrill just doesn't go away. I opened the package. I held the ARC up to the light. I inhaled that glorious fresh paper smell. I caressed the spine. I checked the spine. (Yes, all of my consonants were there.) I thumbed through the ARC, pretending I was encountering it for the first time. It was pretty friggin' glorious. All of it. You can't tell from the cover, but the St. Martin's art department really went wild with this one: the interior design is nothing short of spectacular. Later in the week I'll throw up a sample page or two, and you'll see what I mean. The only downside is that Severance Package is due to appear in bookstores until November; I wish it were out now.

Which brings me to my second package: my BookExpo America badge. If you happen to be attending BEA this weekend, be sure to stop by the Mystery Writers of America booth (#2750) at 10:30 a.m., where I'll be signing and giving away Severance ARCs to the first two dozen people who show up. Joining me will be Megan Abbott, who will have a pile of Queenpins to share. Afterwards, we're going to head over to the Hard Case Crime booth to check out the models. Ahem.