Blogging Anonymously ~ by Tigermom

So this week Mothers in Medicine is hosting a Metablogging week. What is that? It is blogging about the experience of blogging. Navel gazing for sure, but stuff that hits me to the core.

I write infrequently here, though I comment freely on my favorite blogs, because of my conflicted feelings about blogging.

I love to read blogs. I enjoy practicing writing out my thoughts. I live for Fizzy's cartoons, the things people say to Dr. Grumpy, and The Happy Hospitalist's analyses about healthcare.

But I worry about being judged. I worry about my own privacy. I worry about my patients' privacy.

I learned about blogs when Mama told me she had started one and I started to read hers. A curious first read escalated quickly into nightly reading sessions while sitting with Cub #2 at bedtime. When Mama and Jay started this blog, I wondered if I would ever feel brave enough to do similarly.

Reading blogs lets me into the worlds of so many people. And it is that privilege of listening to peoples' stories that appeals to me in my work as a psychiatrist.

But I would rather disappear than tell my own deepest darkest secrets.

While I think it is therapeutic and thought provoking to let it all out, I fear being judged more.

So, I could blog instead about everyday things, not deep dark secrets: the vagaries of parenting, work/family life issues, medical practice issues?

I feel too busy parenting to write much about that.

I feel more or less in balance with my work and family, ie never quite in the right balance.

I cannot see any way to write about my patients and still respect their privacy.

And Dinah, Clink, and Roy at Shrink Rap channel everything I think about how to practice psychiatry already even when they disagree.

My first post was inspired by a real event that moved me. As was my second or third. Being moved seems the right motivation to write. So maybe I have a high threshold for being moved. I shared my blogging with Tigerdad, my sister - who is a real writer, and my mom - my eternal support. And they all have been supportive.

But I struggle with privacy.

Psychiatrists grove on conflict so feel free to interpret, but gently please.