Boolean Bozoism #13: Labor Day Edition

There’s an old saying: With great power comes great responsibility. There’s another one: With greater hit count comes greater numbers of bizarre search phrases. As Pottersville enjoyed a fairly good month from a hit count standpoint, the sheer number of inane search phrases also multiplied. What follows are the ones collected just between today and the middle of August:

what is the trick to figure out what day of the week it is
my snake's injured her jaw
put the lotion in the basket analysis
is preska a jewish name (Who was this, Mel Gibson?)
how to address a group of attorneys in a letter (How about, “Dear vampires who shamelessly suck on human misery…”?)
how can michael moore blame bush when obama is in office (Exactly! It’s not as if we don’t reset our memories and restart history with a new administration or that there’s any such thing as cause and effect.)
mother fucker what big brass
review of william griggs homosexuality (Uh, William, is there something you’d like to share with the rest of the class?)
fuching ginecology
apology letter from a hairdresser to client (“…therefore, in summation, I again apologize for the tragic mishap but what were the odds of my sneezing while holding a pair of scissors?”)
who are the 47000000 uninsured in the united states (Let’s see: A. Aaronson, Aaron Abrams… this may take a while…)
how to pull the rod from a card catalog
jizzhut accident fuck
guy drew dick jeopardy

Then there are those inquisitive, manly souls who are really, really inquisitive about the fine art of cocksuckery:

WHAT MAKES A GOOD COCKSUCKER (A saintly tolerance for lobbyists?)
professional cock sucker salary (Which is nothing compared to the exercised stock options.)
gay educated cock suckers (Well, if you’re going to learn, learn at the feet of the best.)
michele bachmann sucking cock (Sorry to disappoint but Michele does demonstrate her technique right here.)
north bergen blowjobs (Nice to know that Hal Turner’s picked up a trade in prison.)
barney frank sucks cock (Probably the same guy holding this sign.)
cocksuckers supreme (Is that the most expensive pizza at Jizz Hut?)

As always, Pottersville is well-read by those who live south of the Mason Dixon line and the Midwest:

boy jurks off looking at sister fucking black man (The nurve of those fucking purvs.)
amture white fucking a bid black dick (One has to wonder if he meant to type “amateur” or “mature.” But both, admittedly, involve unappealing scenarios.)
blackmen fucking white woman violently
do negroes have big dicks
married mom big tits fucking black boys niggers
black people are dangerous
gladney nigger

As usual, Pottersville involuntarily caters to the needs of those whose interests tend, shall we say, to the exotic:

pigboy sex (Interestingly, when you do a Google image search, these images show up. Go figger.)
double jointed porn stars
dominican boy prostitution (I didn’t know that Rush Limbaugh had heard of this site.)
limbaugh dies fat (Well, how else would he die?)
bool dog fucking girl
gay black yellow bones
arabiandicks.com+passwort
fine yellowbones fucked and suck
welcome to the fuck shot world (Is that supposed to be a tautology?)
someone puting on a condom on his own dick (The instructions weren’t enough? You need a fucking video tutorial?)
jizz=penıs
possible gay poll questions (Such as, “Are you now, or have you ever been, Mark Foley?”)
Did Glenn Beck's mother kill her self because she caught him sexually abusing small boys ? (That is heinous. We know for a fact that Glenn Beck only rapes almost fully-grown girls.)
lisa ann welcomes the groom into the family by screwing his brain outs (Believe it or not, this is the title to an actual porno movie but how Pottersville got a hit from it is anyone’s guess.)

As one would expect, the passing last month of Senator Edward M. Kennedy didn’t go unnoticed by those keenly intent on memorializing the liberal lawmaker’s life and career:

why so many officials dying of brain cancer, conspiracy
who the hell is ted kennedy that he deserves such attention
edward kennedy despicable fat shit
celebrat kennedy motherfucker's death
shit head kennedy

Do I or do I not have a credible case in suspecting the next three search phrases came from John Yoo?

inquisition testikles
testicle brutalization
extreme cock balls torture gay

Then there are those who seem to think that Google is a men’s room wall. Now if only they left the usual phone numbers…

sara sucks cock in wv
loni fucks rodney moore

Then, as usual, there are those who are making God Himself regret ever inventing silicon:

in what why you welcome the famous personality in good words in a show
mother fuckers names
Gingrey Congress prick notice his self serving speach on hearings on health care (Fortunately, I grade on effort and not so much on spelling or coherence.)
donky fauck boy
animal crossing wild world +accidentally sold tissue box to tom nook how do I get it back?
chines fuck for back
shower pan hot mop in Woodbury, MN
"fuck the farmers" latin translation

And the winners for the three scariest search phrases of the summer are:

an old computer game where you went on a killing spree there where clowns and a sink full of blood
embarrassing rectal thermometer experiences
civil war II where will white homeland be?