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Discographies

The Black Eyed Peas: 1-2 "Fuck 'artistic integrity.'" 3-5 "What we need is a hot girl, a Pepsi endorsement and some surplus X-Men costumes." 9:46 AM Oct 12th via web
Coldplay: 1-4 "Imagine a sturdy, comfortable walking shoe (in focus-group tested shades of beige) gently tapping on a human face — forever." 9:42 AM Oct 8th via web
ABBA: 1-7 "The aliens spoke and dressed oddly. Oh, how we laughed!" 8 "We didn't realize what they'd given us until after they were gone." 9:24 AM Oct 7th via web
Kings Of Leon: 1-2 "fierce energy" = loud and dull; 3-5 "greater artistic maturity" = each generation gets the Goo Goo Dolls it deserves. 9:47 AM Oct 6th via web
Foo Fighters: 1-6 "My old position was eliminated and I am seeking employment. I have a strong knowledge of current trends in my industry." 12:20 PM Oct 1st via web
Alanis Morissette: 1 boy meets girl; girl fellates boy; boy dumps girl; girl writes excruciating poetry. 2-5 "My Etsy store is doing great!" 9:45 AM Sep 30th via web
[NB: @Discographies does not acknowledge the legitimacy of Squeeze, the in-name-only "5th Velvet Underground album." Neither should you.] 2:40 PM Sep 28th via web
The Velvet Underground: 1-2 "With incredible speed, the explosion changed the world." 3 "Then it got quiet." 4 "Nothing was left but rock." 12:35 PM Sep 28th via web
Hole: 1 nothingness; 2 emptiness; 3 hollowness; 4 a void. 9:28 AM Sep 27th via web
Steely Dan: 1-3 "Yes, it's funny when you make your 'ironic jazz hipster face'..." 4-9 "...but one day it's just gonna get stuck like that." 12:43 PM Sep 23rd via web
Linkin Park: 1-4 "Quick! Into the time machine! If we can stop Run-DMC from meeting Aerosmith, this horrific future-world will never exist!" 11:49 AM Sep 22nd via web
REM: 1-3 "I can't hear you!" 4-8 "Yeah, you sound clearer now." 9-10 "I'm losing you." 11-13 "You're breaking up!" 14 "I heard you already." 2:08 AM Sep 21st via web
The Smiths: 1-4 The revenge of a teenage boy who stared at the photos on his bedroom wall and hoped for a light that would never go out. 2:49 AM Sep 17th via web
popten Interview with @discographies http://bit.ly/bdUK27 7:52 AM Sep 16th via WordTwit Plugin Retweeted by Discographies and 7 others
Jane's Addiction: 1 Drugs won't make you Lou Reed. 2 Big-ass riffing won't make you Led Zeppelin. 3 Persistence won't make you interesting. 10:40 AM Sep 15th via web
Joanna Newsom: 1 Plink! Plinketa-plink!; 2 Plink! Plinketa-plink! (with orchestra); 3 Plink! Plinketa-plink! (for two goddamned hours) 11:05 AM Sep 14th via web
The Flaming Lips: 1-7 the first 20 minutes of "2001" remade by hyperactive children; 8-13 the last 20 minutes of "2001" remade by furries. 2:43 AM Sep 13th via web
Kiss: 1-6 successful product introduction; 7-10 overexposure kills brand; 11-17 relaunch w/"edgy" imaging; 18-19 "the old package is back!" 9:59 AM Sep 11th via web
Metallica: 1-4 "Run! Run! A monstrous juggernaut is coming to kill us all!" 5 "It stopped! Why?" 6-9 "Choked to death on its own fumes." 11:02 AM Sep 8th via web
Kraftwerk: 1-3 beta-testing; 4,6,11 motion simulators; 5,8 communications systems; 7 robots/sex/cities; 9,10 Dance Dance (post-)Revolution. 4:44 AM Sep 8th via web