Exit Smiling

There is nothing like a feel good movie (especially these days). These movies always make me feel good - especially the endings:


It's A Wonderful Life
Babe
Almost Famous
Dirty Dancing
Sister Act
Slumdog Millionaire
Billy Elliot
To Kill A Mockingbird

Sullivan's Travels
Ferris Bueller's Day Off
Happy Feet
Toy Story
Gregory's Girl
Chocolat
The Graduate
Trading Places
Rocky

 

Lessons From A Bygone Campaign

In more ways than one, Barack Obama and the Democratic leadership should take a few lessons from Lyndon Johnson and the 1964 campaign.

In 1964, the Democratic ticket of Lyndon Johnson and Hubert Humphrey ticket defeated Republicans Barry Goldwater and William Miller in one of the biggest landslide Presidential elections in history (it ranks #5). Johnson, who was sworn in as President upon the death of John F. Kennedy in 1963, received 61% of the popular vote and 486 votes. Goldwater got 38.5% of the vote and 52 electoral votes. The defeat of Goldwater was so overwhelming he took down the Republican party with him.

The more things change, the more they remain the same (only different).

Johnson road the coattails of Kennedy's popularity and painted Goldwater as a reactionary who wanted to end Social Security. Johnson, as part of his campaign, was promising to expand Federal programs to include Medicare and Medicaid.

Richard Nixon, who had lost the 1960 election by one of the narrowest margins and then was defeated in the 1962 California gubernatorial race, had decided that no one was going to "kick him around anymore" and opted not to run. During the 1964 primary season, there was a clear divide between the Conservative and Moderate wings of the party. Goldwater championed the Conservatives and was eventually crowned "Father of the Conservative Movement." His opponent in the moderate wing was Nelson Rockefeller, the Governor of New York.

Rockefeller was initially the front-runner, but his quick 963 marriage to Happy Murphy (who gave up custody of her kids to get divorced and marry the governor) angered the social conservatives in the party and caused his poll numbers to plummet. Senator Prescott Bush (who unfortunately spun off a dynasty that would later lead this country to real ruin) was one of the most vocal critics of Rockefeller. Goldwater would secure the nomination after narrowly winning the California primary (Happy Rockefeller had given birth 3 days before primary day, and this revived the adultery issue).

At the 1964 convention in San Francisco, Rockefeller was booed as he gave his speech condemning the conservatives. The open warfare between the two sides led to a split in the party that could not be healed during the 1964 presidential campaign.

Goldwater was a strict Libertarian and had a deep hate of communism. He voted against the 1964 Civil Rights Act, which Johnson was able to use to tarnish Goldwater as a racist. Goldwater's comments from his past came back to haunt him. His criticism of Eisenhower caused the former (and still popular) Republican President to withhold support. He often spoke about his dislike of liberal social and economic policies - to which Johnson used in a commercial. He remarked about selling the Tennessee Valley Authority and stated that the military "should lob a nuclear bomb into the men's room of the Kremlin." Aside from Eisenhower, moderate Republicans like Rockefeller and George Romney (Mitten's dad) refused to support him.

One person who actively supported Goldwater was Ronald Reagan. A speech in support of the GOP nominee was used in television commercials during the campaign. This is often thought of as the launch of Reagan's political career.

Johnson successfully painted Goldwater as an extremist and right winger. The Johnson staff took Goldwater's campaign slogan of "In your heart, you know he's right" and morphed it into "in your guts, you know he nuts" and "in your heart, he's too far right." All of Johnson's ads concluded with "the stakes are too high for you to stay at home."  The famous "daisy ad" which had a little girl picking daisies just before a nuclear attack, was probably the most effective ad for the Johnson campaign.  That ad only aired once.

Goldwater won 6 states - Arizona and five states in the heart of Dixie (he was the first Republican to win the Deep South since Reconstruction).

Of course in 1964 there were only three television networks, no national newspapers and no takeover the radio airwaves by mega-owners.  There was not a mouthpiece to counter the arguments tossed out by Johnson - being in charge really meant having the bully pulpit.  Today, the lack of limited access has degraded the bully pulpit as a position of dictating the narrative.

Barry Goldwater went on to be re-elected to the US Senate in 1969 and served until 1987.

The father of the modern Conservative movement, while often admired by some of the more intellectuals in the GOP, would more than likely cringe at the lunacy of the party he led to a resurgence.

Goldwater's father was Jewish and sometimes referred to himself as Jewish (he was raised Episcopalian). He rarely attended church. Goldwater won the Arizona Senate seat in 1952. He was an active supporter of the conservative coalition and was a staunch anti-communist and was known to match his convictions with his actions. He did not vote to censure Joseph McCarthy, but often rejected the wild fringes of the anti-communist right. He was a strong supporter of state's rights due to his libertarian views. Goldwater was one of the Senators who forced the resignation of Nixon in 1974 (Goldwater hated Nixon and stated "Richard Nixon was the most dishonest person I ever met in my entire life.")


In 1980, as Reagan easily defeated Jimmy Carter, Goldwater barely won his Senate seat. As the religious right became more influential in GOP politics under his protege Reagan, Goldwater became more outspoken on several key Republican hallmarks. He viewed abortion as a matter of personal choice and that the government should stay out. While the religious right supported him in 1980, he then voted to uphold abortion rights and resented the bullying of these religious organizations.

When Jerry Falwell opposed Sandra Day O'Connor's nomination to the Supreme Court in 1981, he said "every good Christian should kick Falwell in the nuts." He criticized the military's ban on gays, told the GOP to lay off Clinton. He wanted to legalize medical marijuana.  He did not want to be associated with the new right of the Republicans. In 1989, he stated the Republican party had been take over by a :"bunch of kooks." (if he only was alive today!). In 1994 he said to the Washington Post:

When you say "radical right" today, I think of these moneymaking ventures by fellows like Pat Robertson and others who are trying to take the Republican party and make a religious organization out of it. If that ever happens, kiss politics goodbye .

Finally Barry Goldwater said to Bob Dole during the 1996 campaign "we are the new liberals of the Republican Party."

I surely do not agree with much of Barry Goldwater's politics and ideals - but he was basically a man of conviction and one who would adapt over time. Some of his policies were extreme, but as real libertarian - his cause was individual freedom and policies, not the lunatic arguments of the current GOP torch bearers. Having a viable opposition is actually a good thing for this country - but the current Republican party is not so much opposition as it is just obstructionism and idiocy.  Barry Goldwater died in 1998 - he must be turning in his grave with the thought of Sharron Angel, Joe Miller, Rand Paul, Christine O'Donnell and especially Sarah Palin as the new keepers of the right.

Double Creature Feature

Double Creature Feature

Movie: What's the Matter with Christine?



Movie: Wishful Thinking aka This Should Only Happen

The Golden Age of Television

There is a fifth dimension beyond that which is understood by a normal man. It is a dimension as empty and vapid as space. It is the middle ground between insanity and evil, between creationism and global warming denying, and it lies between in the pit of American's fears and the summit of their stupidity. This is the dimension of Demint's demented. It is an area we call the Teabag Zone.

Here are the seven best episodes from the classic series

Masks of Tragedy

Devil in the Napkin Holder

(complete with matching toy)

Will the Real Teabagger Please Stand Up?

Senate Candidate 12 Looks Just Like Sarah

To Serve Corporations

Nightmare Weighing 20,000 Lbs.

Talking "Tina" Christine O'Donnell

here is a clip of best episode you vote the best Teabag Zone of all time - it even has a real twist ending

Fun Fun Fun til Your Daddy Takes the T-bag Away

Well, she got the Moose's nod
And she's the new Senate nominee wow
Seems like Fux News has a new darlin'
Like Queen Sarah told them would now
And with Rush, Sean and Karl showing wood
they can't hide the fact she's insane now.
But she'll have fun, fun, fun
til her daddy takes the T-bag away

Who'd of ever thought that watching the country turn into Somalia and that listening to the current crop of Republican "leaders" lie, scare, and mislead every day would be fun.  It never dawned on me that voting for the next Senator or Representative who could potentially end Social Security, help overturn Roe v. Wade,  or continue to favor the rich would like one giant pie fight.

Yesterday, Matt Lewis, a "pundit" who makes the rounds of the cable chat fests as a so called "conservative expert" (I guess because he has a blog) chimed in on the Christine O' Donnell primary victory. (After listening to Lewis for the first time - I quickly realized he is the same as every other political hack on the right - just another person who thinks he knows more than the rest of the country, but in reality makes it up shit just like everyone else.  But in Lewis' case, he just happens to have the good fortune of knowing the right folks at the cable channels to get him on the air - which in turn helps him sell books).

The proof in in the black and white (or living color) pudding. Lewis actually called voting for O'Donnell - "the fun vote." Yep, voting for a completely insane whacked out moron who believes in creationism and wants to outlaw masturbation - is something akin to watching The Hangover or the Marx Brothers.

There you have it - the precise reason why this country is falling off a cliff.  The people who make decisions on war, defense, health care spending, egg inspections, oil policy, wiretapping, interest rates and a few other minor things that affect 7 billion humans are not there to govern, they are there to entertain.  We are governed by a bunch of people no better (or funnier) than Martha Raye or Jerry Lewis.  The US government (to "pundits" like Matt Lewis) is nothing more than a bad vaudeville skit that needs to be Gonged.

The problem is Lewis is right.  Most of this country could care less about the issues and would rather vote for someone that is "fun to have a beer" with or would be a good "roll in the hay."  It doesn't matter that our previous beer buddy and current old man's wet dream both have a minimal grasp of reality, not one iota of worldliness and zero intellectual curiosity - they were (and are) very entertaining.

In a country that will lead the news and cheer when $25 million is spent on one baseball player or a movie star, but refuses to endorse paying decent wages to teachers and wants to see unions disbanded and public employees eliminated - I guess you can't expect much more. Making the electoral process like another day in Romper Room sure beats dealing with foreclosures, dead soldiers or crumbling bridges. 

In all seriousness, the 24/7 cycle of news created in the past 20 years has been a blessing to late night comedians and a nightmare for 300 million citizens.  Instead of the transparency and education having such extensive and pervasive communication could bring - what we have ended up with is news from John Stewart on Comedy Central and comedy from Sean Hannity on Fox News.  Talk about irony.

Americans might not be so good at making things (except financial instruments) or having the next big idea any more - but the masses in this country are experts at knowing what is entertainment - and what is not.  The endless ordeal of crap from Lindsay Lohan, the endless trail of mistresses for Tiger Woods and now the endless vapidity from the current crop of Teabagging candidates - are all well worth the investment in time - they make us smile and forget.   Problem is Lindsay and Tiger have absolutely nothing to do with how our we go about our business - they truly are just soma for the masses.  But laughing at the keystone kops who will be sitting in the Capitol or Supreme Court won't be so funny if we end up with Senator O'Donnell, Senator Angle or President Palin in the next few years.  NOW that would be a laugh riot.

But this is America - land of opportunity and freedom.  If we want stupid and incompetent people to run the nation - because they amuse us - then we have the right to have stupid and incompetent people run the place. So instead of being so somber and serious about the drab and mundane electoral process - let's turn it into a game of Hide and Seek and make Christine O'Donnell it.  And if we really want to have fun - let's also make sure Angle, Rubio, Paul, Miller and the real queen of this burlesque - Palin - all get their chances to be King of Hill.

Then the fun will really begin!



Well, the boys can't stand her
'Cause she walks, looks, and talks like a prude now
She makes a box of Trojans look like
a rubber balloon, now
A lot of guys try to catch her
But she leads 'em to her chastity belt now
But she'll have fun, fun, fun
til her daddy takes the T-bag away

Tinkerbell to the Rescue

Yesterday seven states went to the polls to vote in the final round of primaries before the midterm elections. The story of the night was the ascension to heaven of the media's newest version of video viagra - Christine O'Donnell of Delaware.

By the way - Christine O'Donnell is a complete whack job.

While you couldn't get away from Christine - you also couldn't get away from the fact that every single cable outlet attributed Chrissie's victory to America's King-maker - Tinkerbell herself - Sarah Palin.

Despite the fact this moronic, half-term quitter who doesn't read, is apparently is a total nasty wench to everyone, the old white men of the media have anointed her the single most powerful woman on the planet. If you listen to the clowns of Faux, the sprinkling of her fairy dust is nothing short of a guaranteed electoral victory. [you will notice they never mention the races where Palin's fairy dust was nothing more than a stream of dingleberry juice].

So Sarah, sprinkle away:

She is so powerful she has them begging for anything.

Before she blessed O'Donnell with her dust, Palinda had to make sure she was a good teabagger and not a bad teabagger?

 

Besides being a creationist and stating there are no facts to support evolution, Frau Christine also said that she would have turned over hidden Jews over to the Nazis. In O'Donnell-land, lying is always wrong, even to protect people marked for murder in Auschwitz.

Our Miss Christine has some interesting sexual hangups.

O'Donnell:

"The reason that you don't tell [people] that masturbation is the answer to AIDS and all these other problems that come with sex outside of marriage is because again it is not addressing the issue. ... You're just gonna create somebody who is, I was gonna say, toying with his sexuality. Pardon the pun."

O'Donnell:

"When a married person uses pornography, or is unfaithful, it compromises not just his (or her) purity, but also compromises the spouse's purity. As a church, we need to teach a higher standard than abstinence. We need to preach a righteous lifestyle."

O'Donnell:

"The Bible says that lust in your heart is committing adultery. So you can't masturbate without lust."

O'Donnell:

"Yes, I am a Christian. Yes, I do seek to surrender my entire life to the will of our Father. That is precisely why I don't talk about abstinence or secondary virginity when I am asked to speak about sex. Abstinence is a physical discipline, not a calling. It makes our physical condition the goal."

O'Donnell:

"I know many physical virgins who are not sexually pure. I know many virgins who are into pornography or who are "doing everything but" with their boyfriends. On the flip side, I know many non-virgins who live beautiful, holy, pure lives through the power of Christ's blood."

This is what our country has come to - people like Angle, Paul, Rubio, Miller and now Christine O'Donnell - a stuffed ballot box away from making policy and law for 300 million people.

Mayflower Madmen

The story of the Pilgrims is taught to every school child as part of basic American history (except perhaps in districts held hostage by teabaggers, fundamentalist nutjobs, or those that truly believe intelligent design).

The Pilgrims had a set of beliefs that were different from the rest of English society and the Church of England. Wishing to practice as they believed, these "Separatists" formed their own church in the small village of Scrooby in England.

During this era, there was no separation between the Government and the Church of England. King James I was head of both the country and the Church. For those that chose to disregard the canons of the church. it meant not obeying the king. Under British Law this was treason.

The Pilgrims, fearing persecution, left England, in search of a safe haven to practice their religion. They landed in Leiden, Holland where for 12 years, they worshipped their tenets under Pastor John Robinson.

While life in Holland gave them the religious freedom they craved, the Pilgrims were also poor and had little money to survive.

In search of both religious freedom and the chance to grow as a society, the Pilgrims sailed to North America. They didn't want to join the Jamestown colony in Virginia, because they feared the English people there would treat them as badly as back in Britain. The Pilgrims settled near the mouth of the Hudson River near what is now New York City.

The new settlers found businesspeople who were willing to give them money in exchange for a share of the profits made in America. The Pilgrims bought a small ship called the Speedwell and sailed back to England. They stayed long enough to buy a larger ship, the Mayflower. They set sail from Plymouth on September 16.
On December 23, the Pilgrims went ashore it what is now Plymouth, Massachusetts.

This was the beginning of religious freedom in the New World - or America.

Fast forward 403 years to 2010 and we are seeing the beginning of the end of the Pilgrims dream of religious tolerance.

Hate in America is not new. The country has spent a better part of its 234 years finding a group or groups to despise and scapegoat. African-Americans, Chinese, Japanese, Communists, Gays, Union members, Women, and Hispanics have all felt the organized wrath of large swaths of American society. When the founding fathers had the foresight to enshrine freedom of religion and the separation of church and state in the Constitution, they were able to keep widespread and endemic religious intolerance at bay.

While many religious groups did find an unwelcome and antagonistic environment - there has never been any long term targeting and overt hostility to one particular faith.

Until now.

Led by rightwing politicians, teabaggers, fundamentalists and even the media, there has been a direct, menacing and even subtle campaign against Muslims in this country. What existed as an undercurrent of contempt toward Islam since 9/11, has exploded into open derision against the religion. For nine years, much of the hate towards Muslims was kept muzzled and out of sight. Today it has become part of mainstream thinking and accepted speech to hate over 6 million Americans for nothing more than how they practice.

The hate mongers use Islamic fundamentalism and 9/11 as their excuse, but in reality their actions are nothing more than the desire to add to Muslims to the list of acceptable groups to hate.

Somehow having George Bush in office kept the hate locked in Pandora's box. But since the 2008 election of a Black Muslim Kenyan with the middle name of Hussein, the disdain for an entire religion has crept out from under the rock and is now dominating the news.

First there are the political leaders who are literally using their bully pulpit to end religious freedom in this country. You have mainstream and "credible" leaders such as former Speaker of the House (the third highest ranking government official) Newt Gingrich actually releasing a movie which advocates an Islamic threat to America. The movie, called America at Risk claims the world as a dangerous place filled with radicalized Muslims who want to -- and can - destroy America. The voice over in the trailer says "This is the end of times. This is the final struggle."

This insane hate-filled asswipe is on the short list for the GOP 2012 Presidential nomination.  But under the same 1st amendment which grants religious freedom, Gingrich is free to spew all the hate and lies he wants.

I will say that Newt's little movie does have nostalgic value. There was a time not too long ago when a corporal in the German Army running for Chancellor made a lot of the same type of claims against another religion group - the Jews. We all know how that turned out. I am surprised Newt's wife number three isn't hawking canisters of Zyklon B with Sharron Angel as 2nd amendment remedies during the trailers in the beginning.

Newt isnt' the only potential Presidential nominee leading the charge of Muslim-hate. Teabagger Queen Sarah Palin (who spends as little time as possible with her children, including the special needs child Trig) has chimed in quite steadily on this subject. Only Naschnook of the North has been a lot more subtle about spreading the hate around. She hasn't outwardly called for a crusade against Muslims like Gingrich - she just keeps hinting that this religion is all about anti-Americanism.

Not to be outdone by Gingrich and Palin - three current members of Congress - Sue Myrick, Paul Broun and John Shadegg (suprise - all Republicans!!!) last October called for an investigation of Muslim interns in Congress due to potential ties with CAIR - a organization the right has determined is tied to terrorists.

As a side note, the US government is of course all angelic and forthright. We have never had any ties to groups advocating terrorism, violence and the overthrowing of governments - none in El Salvador, none in Iran, none in Chile, none in Nicaragua, none in Cuba, etc.

Then there is the media contribution to the decline of religious tolerance. For two weeks the legitimate mainstream media was held hostage by an evil, deranged Pastor in Florida who threatened to burn Korans on 9/11. First Pastor Asstor Jones said the burning was to point out the extreme elements of Islam, then he changed the story (with help from others since Jones has no brain to actually think with) to conflate it with the Community Center controversy in Manhattan. I personally believe Jones had no intention of ever burning those books, but he got exactly what he wanted -- attention that only Lindsay Lohan could ever dream of getting. After all, Jones had General Petraeus, the entire CNN newsroom, Hillary Clinton, Robert Gates and other government officials, and the thousands of idiot reporters camped out on his lawn in Florida all kissing his feet.

Jones showed it really doesn't take very much to get the attention one craves and have the MSM be a conduit for your hate and intolerance. Expect Jones to sign a book and movie deal very shortly. Worse, the irresponsible behavior of the news media has allowed more animosity towards an entire religion to creep (or maybe cascade) into the American lexicon.

Then there are religious leaders crackpots like Pat Robertson. Robertson has railed on about Islam for years. Back in 2007 he said:

"Ladies and gentlemen, we have to recognize that Islam is not a religion. It is a worldwide political movement meant on domination of the world. And it is meant to subjugate all people under Islamic law." He characterized the American Muslim community as "Islam light" and went on to say Muslims "want to take over and we want to impose Sharia on you. And before long, ladies are going to be dressed in burqas and whatever garments they would put on them, and next thing you know, men are going to be allowed to have wife-beating and you'll be beheading adulterers and so on and so forth."

Not to be outflanked, Evangelical Pastor Grant Swank said the following:

Now with this being reality, it is time to erect the internment camps worldwide. Put Muslims into those camps. There is no safety for the planet unless we lock up every potential killer. Every Muslim is just that.

Just change a few of the words around, and you get the speech of a certain Austrian corporal talking about the Jews. Hitler wanted to send the Jews to Madagascar. Maybe Swank can talk to the Malagasy government on the island to see if they can accomodate all 1.6 billion.

Robertson, Jones and Swank all want to silence a entire religion because they have determined it to be unworthy of the same freedoms that allow them to preach and spew their special brand of animus.

The insanity never ends.

Then there are the purveyors of "moral" behavior. Bryan Fischer is the director of Issue Analysis for Government and Public Policy at American Family Association.  Fischer's fancy title is just another way of saying deranged, hate-filled douchebag.  Fischer said this:

Here are the takeaways for the United States. First, the most compassionate thing we can do for Americans is to bring a halt to the immigration of Muslims into the U.S. This will protect our national security and preserve our national identity, culture, ideals and values. Muslims, by custom and religion, are simply unwilling to integrate into cultures with Western values and it is folly to pretend otherwise. In fact, they remain dedicated to subjecting all of America to sharia law and are working ceaselessly until that day of Islamic imposition comes.

Compassion thy name is Fischer. Fischer also wants to throw Muslims out of the military - he calls it Don't Ask, Don't Pray to Mecca. Somehow I bet Fischer is okay with what went on at Abu Graibh.

Then there is the mosque community center in lower Manhattan. Protesters claim it is insensitive to build it so close to the former WTC sight.  The perpetrators of 9/11 used their religion as the excuse to destroy buildings and lives.  But this country today has simply decided to equate all Muslims with that heinous act. To that note why aren't we blaming every group and religion associated with Timothy McVeigh for his acts.  Or the religious affiliations of the gunmen at every scene of a mass killing in this country (Luby's in Texas, the beer distribution plant in Connecticut, Post Offices, etc.).  Since two blocks are too close for comfort for some, just what is the standard distance for hallowed ground. Because it is Islam, I guess even the destroyed mosque in Tennessee is also too close to the WTC for comfort.

It appears the world works in some sort of increments - what went around for the Pilgrims in 1607, comes around 403 years later.  The Pilgrims must have been mad to think religious tolerance could last more than four centuries.  What is going on here before our very eyes is nothing short of an organized pogrom against a entire religion - with very few people on the right actually having the balls to call it that. It is no secret that President Obama has no credibility among the teabagger-set - so his calls of understanding will fall completely on deaf ears. But when Gingrich, Palin, Jones, Swank, Robertson, Fischer and the MSM can't get enough of the hate - well the German people also believed it couldn't happen there.

The Front Page

Which came first - journalists turning into to a bunch of sideshow barkers because the only thing Americans want is to be entertained or Americans losing any semblance of reality because the once noble profession of journalism has turned into nothing more than a conduit to sell Tide and Toyotas?

Once thought of as the guardians of democracy, equality, fairness, checks and balance (with figures like Cronkite, Murrow, Rice, Pyle, Bourke-White, Pulitzer), the fourth estate has (d)evolved into a bunch of bobble-headed bimbos reading propaganda off a TelePrompTer on Fox News. And if they are not reading someone else's agenda - you have snake oil salesman like Glenn Beck - who claim they aren't journalists - spewing hate and lies under the cover of a misnomer called Fox News.

Journalism has a long and storied tradition in the United States. The first newspaper published in the Colonies was Publick Occurences in 1690. Today there are thousands of outlets for journalists - blogs, the tubes of the internets, radio, ever-struggling print newspapers and the most influential of them all - still - television. One of the primary reasons this country has been able to flourish and develop far and above other societies has been the presence of a strong, accountable and influential press.

For a minute let's just forget coverage of business, sports, humanities, international, education, health, science, arts and food as part of the generic heading of news. The credibility and quality of content for these particular subjects (as well as many others) has declined dramatically in an age of infinite choice and cannibalized audiences. But none of those topics compare to the absolute trashing and degraded treatment that political and government coverage has taken.

What was once one of the nation's strongest checks on power and corruption in the world's freest democracy, journalism has morphed into a lazy man's sport of quoting polls, hawking books, promoting agendas and handicapping horse races - races that might even be years in the future.

Turn into any of the punditoria shows for any amount of time and you are sure to be a witness to the Road Map to 2012. It is over 2 years until the next election - and already every single journalist pundit has been giving odds and establishing strategies for the people they have deemed most likely to.

No matter how far and fast the economy is collapsing, no matter how many people are out of work, no matter how many bridges collapse, and no matter how many people cannot afford health care - there is never enough time to report about the comings and goings of Sarah Palin, Michele Bachmann, Bobby Jindal, Sharron Angle, Rand Paul and now Joe "the Senator" Miller. Talking about how these guys can (or will) win their respective elections is fun and exciting. Talking about kids with cancer and people being thrown out of their houses is boring and depressing.

Guess what - fun and exciting sell Tide and Toyotas. Boring and depressing make people turn the channel.

I guess if you have to compete with American Idol, The Bachelor, The Real World, Project Runway, Cupcake Wars or a real housewife for those limited and valuable eyeballs - the only way to get attention is to make journalism more like a combination of The Gong Show and the $1.98 Beauty Show. Quality is no longer job one. Getting Jaye P. Morgan or Rip Taylor to laugh their asses off is.

Sarah Palin and her descamisados are not news - they are a cult void of ideas and thought. The Palinistas derive their cohesiveness from hate and subliminal racism. The fact that Palin may be an intellectual zero and one of the stupidest pieces of shit to ever enter this theater of the absurd matters little to "news" organizations, Sarah Palin generates ratings. Whether it is her looks, her lunacy or her lack of intelligence - showing that farbissenah punim on the teevee sells.  And when something sells -- it is the media's best interest to keep that hawker in full public view.  The Teabaggers are not a true political movement - they are a bunch of people united by their anger and empty rhetoric towards things they simply do not comprehend or realize are important and necessary to their own lives. The fact that they are propped up by a bunch of rich businessmen who do have a vested interest in changing the status quo again does not matter to "news" organizations. What matters is they yell loud enough and have enough offensive signs.  And people tune in - America loves to be entertained by their stupidity.

Being both groups are easy generators of eyeballs, the media covers them with the fervor of real news instead of digging through their empty shell - void of any real ideas, political management or concern for progress.

The failure for the press to expose the vacuous nature of Palin and the Teabaggers is only one aspect of political journalism that has harmed American society.  Look at all the current candidates who refuse to debate in public (Steve King and Jan Brewer to name two), who refuse to be interviewed by any medium other than amenable outlets like Fox News (Rand Paul and Sharron Angel), or will only appear in front of friendly and pre-selected audiences. Some sort of unwritten code in American political journalism has been permanently broken. And what is left of the press seems at a loss as to what to do about it.

And how have the "real" journalists handle this new reality - instead of calling out Brewer, Palin and Paul - they cover the foibles of Lindsay Lohan and Tiger Woods and call it journalism.  Oh and they read press releases from the candidates as if they are facts and quote Rush Limbaugh as if he is the last word.

The politicians have beaten the journalists at their own game - the politicians know it, the public knows it - only the journalists haven't quite figured it out.  Journalists used to be savvy about their strategies and smart about their tactics when they went looking for the story. The victory was uncovering the truth, not selling the most Toyotas. Today people like Palin, Romney, Paul, Rubio, King, Boner, and McConnell have been taught to master anti-journalism skills and make the press work for them.  They have been able to stack the deck and play the journalists to their advantage.  And the press is only too willing to oblige.


With the fourth estate having little teeth, smart politicians (or politicians with smart advisors) have become blatant in their contempt and disregard for the press. They can (and will) lie their asses off knowing there will simply be no accountability anymore. These politicians feel empowered by the timidity of the press.  They don't have to debate, they don't have to put themselves through any tough questioning, they don't even have to have any ideas. They just have to act like the Unknown Comic or Gene Gene The Dancing Machine from The Gong Show and they get their 15 minutes over and over and over again.  Just look at Sarah Palin - she should have been gonged a long time ago.

And the saddest part of this whole mess is that much of the country welcomes, rather than mourns, the loss of something so critical to our progress.

Thank You For The Music Part 2

With the impending GOP takeover of the world (at least according to the know-it-alls on the cable entertainment channels)

I though a little music might brighten up such a time for crying....

The say they are the Young Guns, but they really are the Young Diddymen

Is that his Young Gun in his pants or is he just glad to see those ladies

Viagra can do wondrous things

Hard pressed to answer huh?

The new Arizona Border patrol

The Great American Stupids

Both Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino and Bristol "The Unwed Mother with Family Values" Palin are going to be on the next edition of Dancing With The Stars

I didn't think it could get any worse than Tom Delay on the show, but it can. American society has definitely hit a new low.

I was secretly able to get a copy of Bristol's audition tape. Nepotism is alive and well on Dancing With The Stars.

Old Bags Never Die

.... they just board a plane.

(reprint from 8-18-08)

Airport - Pilot Dean Martin knocks up stewardess (this was pre-flight attendant days) Jackie Bisset. His answer "I'll make sure you don't go to a some butcher two flights up over a drugstore." How comforting. A very paranoid and sweating Van Heflin (who, in an obvious plot giveaway - buys flight insurance with coins) boards the plane with a bomb and sits next to stow-away and old bag Helen Hayes. How convenient. Preggers Bisset convinces Hayes to help get the bomb. They fail. Martin tries to get the bomb from Heflin. Heflin runs to bathroom when drunk yells "he's got a bomb." How stupid. Blows hole in plane. Bisset gets shards in her eyes. George Kennedy gets plane to return safely. Hayes gets free flights for life. Go home. Hayes wins Oscar. Go figure.

Airport 75 - Passenger list right out of Hollywood Squares - Norman Fell, Sid Ceasar, Erik Estrada, Beverly Garland and old bag Myrna Loy. Un-possessed Linda Blair needs a kidney and is in a wheelchair. Singing nun-possessed Helen Reddy (that is Sister Helen), serenades her (oh no, not Dominique- nique). Little plane smashes into big plane. Pilot dead. Co-pilot dead - who ya gonna call? - cross-eyed Karen Black. George Kennedy sees trouble again. Reading the tablets, ex-boyfriend Charlton Heston ("it's a mad house") using chariot racing skills and decides to "drop in" and fly the plane. "It's like putting a raw egg back in its shell." Saves plane from that giant ape in the sky. Older bag Gloria Swanson slides down emergency chute, revealing the crotch of a 77 year old. You do the math or visual. Go home.

Airport 77 - George Bailey James Stewart rents a 747 to fly a bunch of rich snobs (including Joseph Cotten, Pamela Bellwood and old bag Olivia de Havilland - who likes to gamble) to his mansion in Florida along with billions of dollars in art. Lesson one - vet the pilot and stewards - as they turn out to be art thieves. Lesson two - don't fly over the Bermuda Triangle when stealing art. Guess what - plane crashes into oil rig (offshore drilling??? McCain would be happy) and somehow 'lands' on the water. Darren McGavin, the resident night stalker says "Some choice - either we all drown or all suffocate." A very sloshed Lee Grant confirms their dilemma when she screams "look, look" as the water goes over the windows. To the bottom of the Atlantic [when money is short for writers, then borrow script from The Poseidon Adventure.] Grant tries to open the door. Lesson three - don't get Brenda Vaccaro mad. Sounding more and more like Rod Stewart, Vaccaro channels her best Muhammed Ali and slugs her. Jack Lemmon scubas dives (yes scuba dives) to the surface. Grant dies. George Kennedy stays at airport. Plane is brought to surface. Go home.

Concorde - Airport 79. You want to know where Saddam hid those WMDs - right in this movie. This one has it all. George Kennedy finally gets to fly the plane - the super sleek Concorde. Susan Blakely knows boyfriend Robert Wagner is selling arms illegally. Wagner knows Blakely knows. Blakely knows Wagner knows she knows. Boards plane with incriminating documents. Bad idea. Her fellow travelers at the speed of sound are Eddie Albert who is head of the airline (Green Acres ain't the place to be), Jimmy Walker (who smokes a lot of dope), old bag Martha Raye (who pees a lot), the entire Russian gymnastics team with old bag coach Mercedes McCambridge's (yes that voice of the devil from The Exorcist is now coaching the balance beam), and Cicely Tyson who is carrying a heart (yes a heart) in an ice box. Wagner orders a missile to chase the plane (and kill Blakely). Kennedy does a few rolls and avoids it. Lots of screaming, heart stays in ice box. Good move and bad move. Wagner orders heat seeking atomic missile to shoot down plane. Ingenious Kennedy, defying all laws of physics, turns off engines to stop the heat and then opens the cockpit window, blows out cabin pressure and sticks his hand outside and fires a flare gun to give the heat-seeking missile a false target.

Oh it gets better. No engines mean plane plunges. Kennedy, the miracle worker, manages to land Concorde in Paris. Everyone spends the night. Kennedy nails a hooker. Next day every person GOES BACK on the same plane (except Tyson, since the frozen heart probably had a myocardial infarction) . Charo tries hard to get on the plane, but Stewardess Sylvia Kristel doesn't buy the seeing eye chihuahua routine. Cuchi cuchi. Blakely (the target) doesn't implicate Wagner in Paris, but instead has dinner with him. Very bad idea. Wagner sets trap to blow cargo door. Guess what- door blows, Kennedy lands plane in Swiss Alps! Red Cross is waiting right there. With full medical supplies. Go home.

Earthquake - Had enough of planes. Overweight old bag Ava Gardner (whose pinup days are long gone) wears a negligee and carries a martini. Gardner is ignored by her father, Lorne Green (who at three years older than her, looks ten years younger), and neglected by her husband, ex-stunt pilot Charlton Heston. She tries to kill herself. Tremors hit. Victoria Principal steals donuts. Walter Matthau gets drunk. Marjoe Gortner goes nuts (well he is nuts). Heston runs to girlfriend Genevieve Bujold. Bujold: "I'm not a nympho, but I am no Mary Poppins either." Heston: "I'm not Billy Graham either exactly, but I am no satyr." You just cannot top that, so at this point GO HOME. By the way Gardner drowns. In a sewer.