Islam: True Threat or Right-Wing Bogeyman?

As I may have mentioned before, I have a friend (former work colleague) who is what I would call a "right-wing Christian." She would call herself simply a Christian. (Of course, she calls me a Liberal - and not as a compliment!). She is a lovely woman and as long as we don't talk about politics or religion we get along fine.

However, back when we worked together, we did make a tradition of occasionally meeting for lunch (along with another person whose political/religious views were in the middle between the two of us) and discussing polarizing subjects such as abortion, gay marriage, evolution and other topics. We did this to try to explore our viewpoints and understand what the "other side" was thinking about those subjects.

She retired six or so years ago, and we still met for lunch on occasion but didn't discuss the forbidden topics anymore. More recently we've only been in touch on e-mail. I have sent her a couple of pictures from the old days when we worked together and a note from time to time. She, on the other hand, has taken to sending me some of the "right-wing" e-mails that get forwarded to her. More and more, these e-mails pertain to Islam, and the threat it poses to Western Civilization, America, and of course, Christians.

Sometimes I just ignore these e-mails. If something is particularly egregious, however, I have felt compelled to respond. And what I've learned is, no matter how conciliatory a Liberal may be in dealing with a Right-Winger, and no matter how many concessions a Liberal may make (e.g., "you have a good point about X, but I do disagree with Y"), the Right-Winger only sees things in black and white and makes no concessions.

I am using my friend as an example of this, and am not trying to make her seem like a bad person. She is sincere in her beliefs and I respect her belief in Christianity. I am writing about this because I am interested to hear others' opinions about some of the points being made, and to share my reaction to them.

One of the key issues that seems to be irking the Right these days is Islam: the religion; and Muslims, the whole group of people who believe in any form of Islam.

Most recently, my friend sent me the following video, which talks about the proposed mosque and community center that will likely be built near Ground Zero. If you listen to it all the way through, it basically says, based on a few quotes from the Qur'an, that Muslims are two-faced and we shouldn't trust them if they want to build a mosque at this site.



I wrote back and told her that if they own the land and are not violating any zoning laws, they have every right to build the mosque there, as one of this country's founding principles is freedom of religion. I told her if we were to ban a mosque there, we would need to also ban any other religious buildings near Ground Zero (i.e., zone them out).

Her response included the following:

"Destroying the American culture and allowing a foreign culture to move in is dangerous – especially when groups like the Muslims refuse to assimilate and begin to demand that they be given the right to govern themselves outside our constitution and laws. This is what is occurring as they more and more demand that Sharia Law be allowed and supported by the politicians. Look at England, France and Spain."

She also forwarded an essay comparing Muslims to the Nazis during World War II, in that the silent majority of Germans did not stand up to the Nazis when they still could have:

"A German's View on Islam

A man, whose family was German aristocracy prior to World War II, owned a number of large industries and estates. When asked how many German people were true Nazis, the answer he gave can guide our attitude toward fanaticism. 'Very few people were true Nazis,' he said, 'but many enjoyed the return of German pride, and many more were too busy to care. I was one of those who just thought the Nazis were a bunch of fools. So, the majority just sat back and let it all happen. Then, before we knew it, they owned us, and we had lost control, and the end of the world had come. My family lost everything. I ended up in a concentration camp and the Allies destroyed my factories.'

We are told again and again by 'experts' and 'talking heads' that Islam is the religion of peace and that the vast majority of Muslims just want to live in peace. Although this unqualified assertion may be true, it is entirely irrelevant.

It is meaningless fluff, meant to make us feel better, and meant to somehow diminish the spectre of fanatics rampaging across the globe in the name of Islam.

The fact is that the fanatics rule Islam at this moment in history. It is the fanatics who march. It is the fanatics who wage any one of 50 shooting wars worldwide. It is the fanatics who systematically slaughter Christian or tribal groups throughout Africa and are gradually taking over the entire continent in an Islamic wave. It is the fanatics who bomb, behead, murder, or honor-kill. It is the fanatics who take over mosque after mosque. It is the fanatics who zealously spread the stoning and hanging of rape victims and homosexuals. It is the fanatics who teach their young to kill and to become suicide bombers.

The hard, quantifiable fact is that the peaceful majority, the 'silent majority,' is cowed and extraneous.

Communist Russia was comprised of Russians who just wanted to live in peace, yet the Russian Communists were responsible for the murder of about 20 million people. The peaceful majority were irrelevant. China's huge population was peaceful as well, but Chinese Communists managed to kill a staggering 70 million people.

The average Japanese individual prior to World War II was not a warmongering sadist. Yet, Japan murdered and slaughtered its way across South East Asia in an orgy of killing that included the systematic murder of 12 million Chinese civilians; most killed by sword, shovel, and bayonet.

And who can forget Rwanda, which collapsed into butchery. Could it not be said that the majority of Rwandans were 'peace loving'?

History lessons are often incredibly simple and blunt, yet for all our powers of reason, we often miss the most basic and uncomplicated of points:

Peace-loving Muslims have been made irrelevant by their silence.

Peace-loving Muslims will become our enemy if they don't speak up, because like my friend from Germany, they will awaken one day and find that the fanatics own them, and the end of their world will have begun.

Peace-loving Germans, Japanese, Chinese, Russians, Rwandans, Serbs, Afghans, Iraqis, Palestinians, Somalis, Nigerians, Algerians, and many others have died because the peaceful majority did not speak up until it was too late. As for us who watch it all unfold, we must pay attention to the only group that counts--the fanatics who threaten our way of life."

First of all, my question is, is it true that the peaceful Muslims don't speak up? Or are we just not hearing about them since the media control what we hear and see, and stories about scary Muslims get a lot higher ratings? I'm guessing the latter explanation is the case.

I found a site that quotes a number of "moderate Muslim" sources that speak out against terrorism. Just one example of many:

"Using the concept of Jihad to justify harming the innocent is contrary to the letter and spirit of Islam. We condemn any violence that springs from this misguided interpretation."

Islam, like Christianity, has many different denominations, some more fundamentalist than others. There has been an Islamist Revival in the last 100 years or so, resulting in the more radical religious movements that are taking place. However, there has also been a movement of Liberal or Progressive Islam.

So to lump all Muslims into one group and tar them with the same brush is as silly as saying that all Christians believe the same thing. Most Christians would certainly condemn the bombing of abortion clinics or even some of the hate speech coming out of certain churches such as the Westboro Baptist Church. So why would conservative Christians believe that all Muslims approve of the hate speech and violence of just some of the denominations in their religion? It's like comparing Westboro Baptist to the United Church of Christ, which ordains gay ministers, both men and women, looks at the Bible as mainly symbolic, and has a very liberal outlook. No comparison! You wouldn't even know it was the same religion.

My friend also forwarded the following comparisons, obviously cut and pasted from elsewhere, into one of her notes to me:

"Mohammed was the prophet of war; Christ is the Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6-7).

Mohammed's disciples killed for the faith; Christ's disciples were killed for their faith (Acts 12:2; 2 Timothy 4:7).

Mohammed promoted persecution against the "infidels"; Christ forgave and converted the chief persecutor (1 Timothy 1:13-15).

Mohammed was the taker of life; Christ was the giver of life (John 10:27-28).

Mohammed and his fellow warriors murdered thousands; Christ murdered none but saved many (compare John 12:48).

Mohammed's method was COMPULSION; Christ's aim was voluntary CONVERSION (Acts 3:19).

Mohammed practiced FORCE; Christ preached FAITH (John 6:29, 35).

Mohammed was a WARRIOR; Christ is a DELIVERER (Col. 1:13; 1 Thessalonians 1:10).

Mohammed conquered his enemies with the sword; Christ conquered his enemies with another kind of sword, the sword of the Spirit which is the Word of God (Hebrews 4:12; Acts 2:37).

Mohammed said to the masses, "Convert or die!"; Christ said, "Believe and live!" (John 6:47; 11:25-26).

Mohammed was swift to shed blood (Romans 3:15-17); Christ shed His own blood for the salvation of many (Ephesians 1:7).

Mohammed preached "Death to the infidels!"; Christ prayed "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do" (Luke 23:34).

Mohammed declared a holy war (Jihad) against infidels; Christ achieved a holy victory on Calvary's cross (Colossians 2:14-15) and His followers share in that victory (John 16:33).

Mohammed constrained people by conquest; Christ constrained people by love (2 Corinthians 5:14).

Modern terrorists derive their inspiration from Mohammed and carry out their despicable atrocities in the name of his god; Christians derive their inspiration from the One who said, "Blessed are the peacemakers" (Matthew 5:9).

Modern day disciples of Mohammed respond to the terrorist attacks by cheering in the streets; Modern day disciples of Christ are deeply grieved at past atrocities carried out by those who were "Christians" in name only (the Crusades, the Spanish Inquisition, etc.)."

My reaction to these statements is that it is very interesting that the Christian beliefs show their sources in the Bible; there are no corresponding sources for the alleged beliefs of the Muslims from the Qur'an. So are any of these comparisons valid?

First of all, it is ironic that the "modern day disciples of Christ" are said to be deeply grieved by past atrocities carried out by "Christians" in the past. I'm sure those past Christians thought they were carrying out the word of God at the time. Plus the generalization that all modern disciples of Mohammed cheer for the terrorist attacks is equally disingenuous (see point #1 above, that there are many Muslims who condemn the attacks).

As for the beliefs of most Muslims, this link debunks the ten most common myths about Islam and also has other interesting links to follow with further explanations. Based on this information, guess what? Islam does not promote terrorism! Here are some verses from the Qur'an that are quoted:

"If anyone slays a person
- unless it be for murder or for spreading mischief in the land -
it would be as if he slew all people.
And if anyone saves a life,
it would be as if he saved the life of all people.
Qur'an 5:32

Invite all to the way of your Lord
with wisdom and beautiful preaching.
And argue with them
in ways that are best and most gracious...
And if you punish,
let your punishment be proportional
to the wrong that has been done to you.
But if you show patience, that is indeed the best course.
Be patient, for your patience is from God.
And do not grieve over them,
or distress yourself because of their plots.
For God is with those who restrain themselves,
and those who do good.
Qur'an 16:125-128

Oh you who believe!
Stand out firmly for justice, as witnesses to God,
even against yourselves, or your parents, or your kin,
and whether it be against rich or poor,
for God can best protect both.
Follow not the cravings of your hearts, lest you swerve,
and if you distort justice or decline to do justice,
verily God is well acquainted with all that you do.
Qur'an 4:135

The recompense for an injury
is an injury equal thereto (in degree),
but if a person forgives and makes reconciliation,
his reward is due from God,
for God loves not those who do wrong.
But indeed, if any do help and defend themselves
after a wrong done to them,
against such there is no cause of blame.
The blame is only against those who oppress men
with wrongdoing and insolently transgress
beyond bounds through the land,
defying right and justice.
For such there will be a penalty grievous (in the Hereafter).
But indeed, if any show patience and forgive,
that would truly be an affair of great resolution.
Qur'an 42:40-43

Goodness and evil are not equal.
Repel evil with what is better.
Then that person with whom there was hatred,
may become your intimate friend!
And no one will be granted such goodness
except those who exercise patience and self-restraint,
none but people of the greatest good fortune.
Qur'an 41:34-35"

It is also explained the Qur'an must be taken as a whole and understood in the context of its times. Interestingly, that is something most Biblical scholars would say about the Christian Bible as well. Sure, there are some bloodthirsty verses in both books, if you take them out of context; in fact, the Qur'an and Bible share many of the same books and stories, so that is not surprising.

This fear of Islam seems to be coming here from Europe, where the Muslim communities are much more widespread and evident in day-to-day life. Some countries are outlawing certain symbols of Muslim religious belief, thinking that by doing so they will send a message or quell the growth of Islam. For instance, Sweden banned the building of any more minarets in their country at the end of last year.

France has passed a bill banning the wearing of the burqa in public spaces, which is expected to be approved. Similarly, Belgium is also in the process of passing such a bill, although it may have trouble passing in their Senate.

Spain recently voted down a similar bill that came before its Parliament.

Syria has joined the list of countries that are putting limitations on the wearing of the burqa (full body coverage) or the niqab (face veil only). Syria has now forbidden the wearing of the veil in schools. Similarly, in Egypt, students are not allowed to wear the veil during exams.

As the article linked above points out, this is symbolic of the deeper rifts within Islam itself.

"But Syria's struggle with Islamists and visible symbols of Islam is part of a wider clash, a clash within Islam itself. Political Islam is gaining ground across both the Arab world and Muslim-majority countries. What happens in this debate matters profoundly, because the same debate is taking place within Muslim communities in the west.

The debate, crudely put, is over the space between the personal and the political. Secular-minded governments have tried to keep faith out of state institutions; Islamists want their faith to guide those institutions. Personal space has also increasingly been politicised, with a rise in the wearing of the headscarf and the veil in Syria and in most Muslim-majority countries.

For the Syrian government this increased religiosity is a serious challenge to its secular, authoritarian rule. Those who look to faith to guide their lives want it to guide their leaders too. Islamists comprise the main opposition in the region: if there were free and fair elections tomorrow, the Islamists would win."

The article goes on to say:

"This is a complex, unfolding argument, with deep roots, but it is one we are scarcely attentive to in the west. Yet it matters, because the same currents affect Muslim communities in Europe and North America. What shape Islam in the west takes, how liberal, how participative, how beholden to faith identity Muslim communities become will be affected by this debate. (And not only Muslim communities: a rise in faith identity will be felt across the political spectrum.)"

How effective is it for any country to ban the wearing of a certain religious symbol in order to try to contain the power of that movement? Not very, in my opinion. Usually banning something just makes those who support it want to do it more and to strengthen the opposition to the law.

And, in an ethical sense, how can any country in all good conscience ban something that is part of a person's religion? How would this differ from banning Jewish men from wearing a yarmulke? Of course, in France, they already did that as part of a ban on any religious symbols being worn in schools. Here we wouldn't do it, so I hope the United States would never consider a ban on wearing the veil. Here's a test to anyone who thinks we should: Would you forbid nuns from wearing habits?

So, back to my original question: Islam: True Threat or Right-Wing Bogeyman?

From what I have read, it seems that most Muslims are indeed peace-loving and their beliefs are not all that different from Christians in terms of how to treat other people. However, some factions of Islam are definitely misusing their religion to resort to gaining political power through violence, and to such a degree that even countries like Syria and Egypt are concerned.

However, my main conclusion is, yes, there may be a threat from the politically-driven Muslim extremists, but certainly not from Muslims as a whole. And some of those who are suicide-bombers are troubled people who used Islam as an excuse to blow things up, much as Timothy McVeigh used Waco as an excuse to blow up the Federal Building in Oklahoma City when he obviously had other issues as well.

Many others are part of politically motivated groups whose purpose in blowing things up is not religious at all but intended to drive out what they consider invaders from their territory. Then they link it to obscure passages in the Qur'an in order to justify actions that go against their religion. But these terrorists cannot be considered in the least bit representative of what Islam is.

In the linked article, Robert Pape of the University of Chicago states:

"I've studied 462 suicide terrorists from around the world since 1980 who actually completed the mission. Over half are secular. The world leader is the Tamil Tigers in Sri Lanka: A Marxist group, a secular group, a Hindu group.

Instead of religion, what over 95 percent of all suicide terrorist attacks since 1980, all around the world have in common is a specific strategic goal, to compel modern democracies to withdraw combat forces from territory the terrorists prize greatly.

The Jordanian attack that we have just witnessed is a prime example of this strategy logic. Here we have four Iraqis leave Iraq in order to attack western targets that Zarqawi's group described as the rear base camp of the American army in Iraq and the Arabian Peninsula."

My take on the whole controversy is that here in America, as long as we keep separation of church and state at its current (already too fuzzy) level, it is unlikely that Muslims will impose Sharia Law on the U.S. Our Constitution would prohibit that. Therefore, it is unlikely that we will become a Muslim nation any time soon. That said, I think we will be subject to occasional terrorist attacks by both Muslims and non-Muslims. Most will be limited and hopefully thwarted.

Yes, it's a danger, but in a free country we cannot go around limiting the freedom of people just because they "refuse to assimilate." Haven't we heard this somewhere before? Oh yes, about the Hispanics. Oh, and the Germans, the Japanese, the Jews, the Irish, the Italians...in fact, any immigrant group that has come to the United States at any point in its history has been blamed for various ills of society.

Right now the bogeyman is Terrorism and the Muslims are getting the blame for it. The funny thing is, back when the IRA was blowing up the English right and left, and some Americans were funding them, there was no big backlash against the Irish in the United States just because some Irish people were blowing up innocent civilians. Why? Well, hey, the Irish Americans look and sound just like us! How could you blame them for what a few bad apples were doing? Or, you could just conclude that one man's terrorist is another man's freedom-fighter and maybe many Americans secretly - or not so secretly - supported the IRA's cause.

The Muslims have a harder row to hoe with the U.S. citizenry, much like the Japanese during WW II. Many of them don't look like us, some of them don't speak English, and they're easy to identify and blame for stuff.

The solution to the problem? Communication and understanding between people. So go ahead and build that mosque and community center near Ground Zero. Maybe some non-Muslims will go in there and actually get to know some Muslims and we will be one step closer to peace.

Leonard Pitts had a good op-ed piece about the mosque at Ground Zero, and I think I will end this post with his words.

Pitts points out that that our "blanket antipathy" to Islam and Muslims is
"...antithetical to what we claim to believe as Americans. How shameful was it that candidate Obama had to keep reassuring voters he wasn't a Muslim, and that no one - not the candidate, not the pundits - thought to say the obvious: What if he was?

Are Muslims not Americans, too? Is that what we're saying now?

Yes, I fear terrorism. But I find I fear even more what my country has become in response to it...

So yes, putting that building in that place might be painful and provocative, but it would also be a reminder of the very values the terrorists sought to kill.

And we seem to need that reminder more every day.

They want to build a mosque two blocks from Ground Zero? Let them."

A Cat's Eye View

Baxter here. It's been awhile since I Blogged but it wasn't My Fault. My Humans have been Preoccupied. There have been some Changes around here, and I must say I'm not that Pleased.

The biggest Change is that the Humans have brought a New Cat into the Household. She is small, but she is a Harridan. She has been given the Spare Bedroom, where I used to like to go into to Hide Out from That Dog. Now I'm not supposed to go in there anymore! So of course, every Moment I have the Chance, I sneak in and try to eat this Other Cat's food. They give her Wet Food. Now, I didn't used to like Wet Food much. But now that I know this Other Cat gets it, I want it too. It's only Right.

My First Contact with this Other Cat came shortly after her Arrival. She crept into the Humans' Bedroom and started Poking around. I was under the Bed and she immediately made a Beeline to where I was and Poked her Head under! I of course had to Hiss mightily - and she Hissed right back! Then she had the Utter Nerve to go into MY Own Room and Poke around. Luckily the Female Human grabbed her and put her back in what is now known as Her Room after that.

Then the Humans took her AND That Dog up to the Cabin with them. The Other Cat goes by the name "Zoe," apparently, although she is often referred to as "The Little Cat," I guess to differentiate her from Me. I've been called Many Things, but Little is not one of them.

Apparently the Little Cat did enjoy herself at The Cabin. Here is a picture of her sitting on a Chair, which my Female Human took just before they brought her back here on Monday.


Apparently the Little Cat managed to Tame That Dog while she was up there at The Cabin. They don't seem to have a Problem with Each Other now. But boy, she still has a Problem with ME.

The Female Human just brought her out of Her Room to try to Socialize her a bit since she had been Hiding Under the Bed a lot since the Return from the The Cabin. So the Little Cat was sitting in my Female Human's Lap and I came in just to be Sociable. I did a bit of Rubbing About my Human's legs and was truly very Civil, I thought. Well, the Little Cat let loose with some Hissing, Growling and Yowling that would raise the Dead! You'd think I was Attacking her or something. Jeez. She obviously has No Idea that I am about 4 times bigger than she is, or she wouldn't act like That. But I took the High Road and did not respond In Kind.

So, that's the News here from a Personal standpoint. I suppose I have to Put Up with this for now but I will Seek Revenge someday.

As for the News Elswhere, the BP Oil Spill (which should be called a Gusher) may Finally be Capped soon; after a Day of Waiting to ensure there weren't going to be unintended Consequences (like Blowing up the Ocean Floor and making even More Oil come out), BP is closing some Valves on a new Cap they are Installing on the top of the broken well. Let's hope it works.

In the Meantime, more Wildlife is dying. And get this - according to the New York Times, they aren't sure what the Animals are actually dying OF. (Obviously it has to do with the Oil, but they aren't sure of the Mechanism since the Animals are not visibly Contaminated.

So, that is Depressing me a Lot these days. After all, a Lot of us Cats eat Fish, either Directly, or Indirectly in our Cat Food. What will we do if all the Fish are Gone? Many of Us might starve.

In Other News, Dick Cheney got a Ventricular Assist Device on his Heart. I could make all kinds of Snide Comments about whether he actually HAS a Heart, or that his Heart needs all the Help it can Get since he is obviously Challenged in that area...but that would be Mean. As a Cat, I try to take the High Ground. And let's face it, if we were talking about a Member of your Own Family, however heinous you considered their Actions or Beliefs, you probably wouldn't want someone else making Nasty Remarks like that. So I will Bite my Tongue and keep those Remarks to Myself.

This week has not been as Good Week for fans of the New York Yankees. Yankee Announcer Bob Sheppard died on Sunday, followed by Yankee Owner George Steinbrenner on Tuesday. Another Era has Gone.

As a Cat, I am not Old Enough to remember George Steinbrenner back in the Crazy Days when he used to fire and rehire Manager Billy Martin every other day. And the Man really mellowed with Age. In the Obituaries for "The Boss," it is being pointed out everywhere that he was a very Charitable Man and often did generous things Anonymously or without any Fanfare. So, even if you hated George for various reasons, remember he did a lot of Good in the World. And he also was the reason the Yankees have done so well all these last 30+ years. (OK, so if you're a Red Sox fan, you're allowed to hate him for THAT).

On a Cheerier Note, I had a Great Week here at Home by Myself. Sure, I missed my Humans, but I didn't have to deal with That Dog OR the Little Cat. I had the Whole House to Myself. And lest you think I was Jealous that the Little Cat went to the Cabin and I didn't, please Disabuse yourself of THAT Idea. I am not a Traveling Cat. I would've been Under the Bed the Whole Time.

Next time my Female Human posts she will be back to talk about Islam and whether or not the religion and its Followers are the Extreme Threat that Right-Wing Christians seem to think they are. Until then, Enjoy your Catnip and try to stay Calm.

This, That and The Other Thing

Hello, Blog World. Sorry for the long silence.

First of all, let me thank everyone from the bottom of my heart for all of your notes of sympathy about my mom. I really appreciated it, and it definitely helped me through this difficult time.

During the last couple of weeks I have been lost in the Facebook world playing interminable games of Bouncing Balls and my latest addiction, Pool Practice. Yes, pool, as in billiards. It's a great FB game that actually allows you to practice all your best shots. And it must work well, because I am lousy at the exact same shots online as I am in the real world. Those corner pockets get me every time; but I'm a whiz on the side ones!

I guess playing these online games is a way to procrastinate and avoid cleaning out my mother's apartment. I have done very little so far, and as a result had to pay the rent for the month of July, since June is now over without progress being made. I really must get it cleaned out this month. I did manage to wash some laundry and throw out some food and other stuff but there is still a lot to do.

I seem to be lost in the doldrums. I'm not sure if it's the heat that is now upon us, or the aftermath of my mother's death, but I am lacking in motivation these days.

Then today I learned some more sad news: Marie from The Attentive Aphorist passed away over the weekend. She was a wonderful person and her voice will be sorely missed. Marie had been having health issues since last year but she had been doing better so I was shocked to hear the news. My deepest sympathies go out to her family and friends.

We're up at our cabin for a whole week, which is heaven compared to the 100 degree heat back home in New Jersey. Our place is at 1000 feet of elevation and there is a nice breeze here at the top of the hill, wafting through the quaking Aspens, Hemlocks, and oak trees that tower above the cabin. Before leaving New Jersey, we did go to the annual fireworks at our local county park on Friday night, so we got our dose of 4th of July before coming up here. We heard the fireworks going off last night in Ticonderoga but were too lazy to drive up and see them there. We did have a hot dog for lunch on the 4th, so that counts for something.

When I logged on today I realized that this is my 500th post since I started blogging in late 2006. I realize some people manage 500 posts in their first year, so I take no great pride in this achievement, but thought it was worth noting. I am sorry I am not coming up with something more brilliant for such a milestone, but it is what it is.

Now that we're up here, I'm hoping to take more time to visit everyone else's blogs, as the 3G MiFi connection here is not ideal for playing online games, which will leave me much more free time to actually read blogs, which is a much more constructive pursuit.

In my recent obsession with Facebook games, I haven't been paying that much attention to the news. Of course, Robert Byrd passed away at 92, the BP oil spill continues, and Congress grilled Kagan. But it all seems to be happening at a distance. I'm hoping when we get home Baxter will be able to catch me up with what's been going on as I'm sure he's been keeping track.

Speaking of Baxter, he is not very happy with the new addition to the family: my mother's cat, Zoe. We brought her over to our house a couple of weeks ago and settled her into the spare bedroom. Baxter is very jealous and anytime the door to that room is open he comes in and tries to eat her food and poke around. They have met up with each other a few times, which resulted in loud hissing on both sides. Also, she eats wet food and until now, Baxter had no interest in it. But all of a sudden he wants wet food too, since Zoe gets it!

So when we came up to the cabin on Saturday we decided to bring Zoe with us and leave Baxter home. He will be happier at home anyway, and we didn't want to leave her home locked up in the spare room. Please don't feel sorry for him. If he were here he'd be spending the whole week hiding under a bed anyway, as he did when we first brought him home.

As it turned out, bringing Zoe up here was the best decision we could have made. She was the perfect traveler and it turns out she loves it up here at the cabin. She has no fear whatsoever, and wanders at will throughout the place, jumping up on windowsills and looking outside. We brought a cage with us that used to belong to our previous dog, Alice, and Zoe is happily sitting out on the deck in the cage surveying the landscape as I write this. I wouldn't dare let her loose on the deck as she could easily jump over the edge and be lost in the woods instantly.

Unlike Baxter, Zoe was able to put the dog in her place immediately. Diva came over to sniff at her while she was in my lap and Zoe immediately let rip a mighty hiss, and smacked her on the left eyebrow. Diva now is afraid to walk anywhere near her, and the cat is now in charge. The ironic thing is that she weighs about 5 lbs. - about a quarter the size of Baxter - but she isn't afraid of anything. Baxter runs out of the room if the dog looks at him.

I'll try to post some pictures of her soon. In the meantime, I hope everyone is enjoying the long weekend.

In Memory of My Mother

In the end, my mother got an infection that weakened her beyond the point of no return. After she was able to get off the ventilator successfully, I had hope that she might surprise everyone one more time and recover enough to at least go to a nursing home and continue to enjoy a few more days and weeks. But c. difficile, brought on by the strong antibiotics they were giving her to ward off pneumonia, did her in. She became weaker and less responsive, and was unable to get off the bi-pap mask that kept her breathing. Like a very old cat who had used up the last of her nine lives, my mother was finally giving up, little by little.

The last night before she died, I had gone to see her in the hospital and could see how weak and unhappy she was.

I had sent my husband up to Cape Cod that day because that week was the week we had originally booked to take my mother up for one last trip to the Cape, and the cottages were paid for. His dad was going to join us on Monday so I told him to go anyway and at least he and Dad could enjoy a week up there. So I was alone that night after I left my mother in the hospital, and I didn’t feel like cooking for myself.

So where else would I go but Star Tavern, where all the waitresses know me and I could sit at the bar and have a pizza and some wine, and think? I arrived and found myself a seat at the bar. The woman behind the bar asked me what I’d like and I ordered a glass of wine and a mushroom pizza. There was a man sitting next to me who turned out to be her husband, and I started talking to him, telling him about my mother’s situation.

They say angels come in all forms and perhaps he was one of them. He had gone through the same thing with his mother in 1994, and told me that I couldn’t ask my mother to make the decision to end her lifesaving care. He said I had to make the decision for her. He said he did it for his mother and it was the best decision he ever made, that it gave him control over the situation and he was able to be sure to be there with her when she died. “You have to make the decision, not her,” he emphasized.

When I left that night and went home I knew what I had to do.

The next morning I called the hospital and told them that when I got there I wanted my mother taken off the bi-pap machine and that I wanted to let her go peacefully.
My aunt and I arrived at the hospital at around 11:30 and sat with my mother for about an hour, talking and reminiscing about happy times in our lives together. My mother was alert and was listening to us. Then finally the doctor’s orders to take off the mask were finalized and the nurse came in and removed it. I looked at Mom and said, “I’m here, Mom,” and she smiled at me. My aunt later told me my mother had squeezed her hand at the same time.

A few minutes later she had trouble breathing so I told the nurse and she came in and administered morphine to calm her…she must have been close to the end because within five minutes she gently stopped breathing and was gone.

Naturally I am sad, and of course I still keep reliving that scene in my mind, and thinking about all the decisions I’d made or events that had happened that had led up to that moment. Should I have stayed home that last weekend she got so sick instead of going to the cabin? If she’d gone to the hospital sooner, would she still be OK? Should I have let her go when she choked on the milk five days earlier, so she wouldn’t have suffered with the infection? Should I have said something to the doctor when he ordered the additional diuretic two weeks earlier, when I knew my mother could easily become dehydrated as she had once before?

But when it all came down to it, I knew I was quibbling about details, about days or weeks, not months of life. My mother was 91 and she had lived a good long life – and was never ill until the last few months of it. My mother hated being sick; she considered it some kind of moral failing. I knew she hated being an invalid and wouldn’t have wanted to keep going in the condition she was in.

Rather than have a viewing, I decided to have her cremated and have a memorial service later, in June. I rode up to Cape Cod that Monday with my father-in-law and we enjoyed a peaceful week at the Cape, reminiscing about my mother and remembering all the good times she had there with us. We had the funeral home divide her ashes so I could bring some of them up to the Cape and scatter them there later this summer; the rest are buried next to my father in the cemetery.

So now I’m left with the other tasks that fall on those who are left when a loved one passes. I worked with the funeral home to finalize her obituary – how do you sum up someone’s life in a few paragraphs? Next comes the planning of the memorial service, which will have a bagpiper play at it as my mother once said she wanted at her funeral. And finally, the mundane things: canceling the cable TV, the telephone service, the newspaper subscription; cleaning out the apartment.

Once all that is done, perhaps I can start thinking about something else. But right now I am still trying to think of a way to honor my mother’s life with something longer than the brief paragraph in the newspaper: “active for many years in the Community Church, sang in the choir, medical writer, avid bowler, Girl Scout leader for over 25 years…” Yes, all those things were important, but don’t sum up who my mother was.

To begin with, she grew up in Massachusetts but once she graduated from Simmons College in Boston with a journalism degree, she took the big step of leaving home and coming to live in New York City, working at a small publication in her first job. I always thought that was pretty brave and rather glamorous.

She then moved to New Jersey and worked for Hoffman LaRoche, writing for their in-house magazine, the Roche Review, for a number of years, before getting a job at a medical advertising agency, Paul Klempner Agency, where she met my father. After they married in 1951, they were very active in the Nutley Little Theater, taking part in a number of plays. When I was born, my mother stopped working, because back then, that's what you did. I don't think she ever really minded, though. She once told me that raising a child is the most important thing she could have done.

In 1962 when we moved up to Penfield, New York, she and my dad were founding members of their little theater group, the Penfield Players. I grew up hanging out at rehearsals and helping my parents learn their lines. Both of them were in the old classic, Arsenic and Old Lace, once in Nutley, once in Penfield. My mother played Aunt Martha in Nutley and Aunt Abby in Penfield; my father Dr. Einstein in both productions. Lines from that play became family jokes for years thereafter..."I've completely lost track of Mr. Spenalzo," for instance, was a line we used whenever we had trouble finding something at home.

My mother also was active in the neighborhood up there, putting her journalism skills to work writing a neighborhood newsletter for the neighborhood association, as well as continuing to be a Girl Scout leader, which she had begun when I was in the Brownies back in Nutley.

We moved back to New Jersey in 1967 as my father got a job in New York at another medical advertising agency, and my parents didn't move again after that. After my father died, my mother moved into the senior citizens apartment down the street from me and enjoyed her time there for four years.

My mother enjoyed telling stories about her time in college, and always remembered the Hurricane of 1938, the unnamed hurricane that unexpectedly slammed into New England one fall. She was trying to make her way home from college in the middle of the storm and had to spend the night at a gas station because the roads were blocked by fallen trees.

She also reminisced about her days as an air raid warden during World War II, which was after she had moved down to New Jersey. She had to go around and knock on people's doors to tell them to turn off their lights during air raid warnings.

My mother's life was not without its tragedies. When I was about two years old, she had another baby, my sister Jessica. Sadly, Jessica was born with a heart defect and back then they couldn't operate on a tiny baby the way they can now. She only lived to be four months old. My mother didn't have another child after that, as by then she was 37, which in those days was considered "too old."

Also, in his later years, my father had bouts of intractable depression and twice had to be hospitalized after attempted suicides; then in his last years he had dementia and eventually had to be in a nursing home before he passed away in 2005. But my mother took it all in stride. She was the kind of person who did what she had to do, didn't complain and didn't bemoan her fate.

I think the best way to describe her personality is just plain nice. It sounds trite to say someone is “nice,” but niceness is woefully underrated in this world. With the exception of Republicans, my mother never said a bad word about anyone, and was unfailingly polite until the very end. Even in the hospital during her last stay, whenever a nurse or aide came in and did anything for her, she always said “thank you.” Her home aides loved her because she was patient and sweet and never complained.

But of course she was more than just nice; she had plenty of personality, and certainly wasn’t without a temper from time to time. And back when I was growing up, of course there were plenty of times we got into arguments, as is natural. But as we got older we got along better and better and truly were in synch.

My mother always loved to read, and it was sad when her macular degeneration got too bad and she was no longer able to read on her own. So during the last two months I took to reading to her; we went through a couple of her beloved Dorothy Sayers short stories about Lord Peter Wimsey, and I would read the comics in the paper to her every day. I hope it gave her back a little of the joy she got from reading.

Of course her love of reading was passed on to me – when I was a child she’d read me Winnie the Pooh and other stories, and I soon loved to read as much as she did. I read all her old favorites as well as many new books I discovered on my own, and still love to read to this day.

When I think back, many of the interests I have today were passed on to me by my mother.

It is from her that I get my love of nature – many a time we walked in the woods with our binoculars, bird watching together. She loved wildflowers, too, and was always pointing out the special ones, the Lady Slippers or the Jack-in-the-Pulpit or the Solomon’s Seal.

As my Girl Scout leader, she took me and the troops on many a campout, where we learned to build fires, tie knots, cook on our tin-can stoves with our Buddy Burners, and hike in the woods. I remember one night we kids were all in a tent telling ghost stories and she came around the outside of the tent and went “Woooooh!” and scared the bejeesus out of us. My mother later told me she never realized a bunch of 10 and 11 –year-olds could make such a loud screeching noise!

After I got older, Mom continued to be a Girl Scout leader – the Junior age group was her favorite (the 5th and 6th graders) and those troops are the ones that she led for the remainder of the time she was active in Girl Scouts, right into her 70s.

I think they finally kind of “retired” her by telling her there were fewer troops that last year and there wasn’t one for her anymore. They gave her a plaque thanking her for all her contributions, but I think they had decided they needed some new blood. Mom still liked teaching the campfires and the knots, while the Girl Scouts had moved on to trying to instill “self-esteem” and other modernistic ideas. I felt bad for her, but as with everything else, she took it in stride and didn’t let it get her down.

A few years later she received a letter from a woman in Florida who had once been one of her Girl Scouts. She had decided to write to my mother and tell her how much she had appreciated the things she learned from her in Girl Scouts.

A friend of mine, another one of her former Girl Scouts, also wrote to her later on telling her that she was now a Girl Scout leader herself. I think my mother felt good to know that her efforts were appreciated. And I’m sure there were many others who felt that way but never wrote to tell her.

The other thing I get from my mother is her love of politics. She and my father were both dyed-in-the-wool , liberal Democrats. They worshipped FDR and JFK, were pro-civil rights, and pro-gay rights even back then. My mother had two good friends who were lesbians and they were part of our inner family circle – I loved going on our frequent visits to Jay and Claire, who treated me as if I were their niece.

My mother woke me up about midnight on Election Night in 1960 to let me listen to the returns coming in on my dad’s transistor radio, since she knew it would be the first presidential election I’d remember. I still remember hearing the announcer saying Kennedy was winning by 100,000 votes. Later, in 1968, she and I went around distributing campaign literature for Hubert Humphrey (since Bobby Kennedy didn’t live to be the nominee). My parents hated Nixon and we were very disappointed when that cliffhanger election was finally won by Nixon by a fraction of the vote.

Politics has always been a big part of my mother’s life, and right until the end she had CNN and MSNBC on all day and was still up on things. I remember when she got out of rehab at the nursing home in March she said she was thrilled to find out that the healthcare bill had passed (her roommate in the nursing home didn’t watch CNN, she watched soap operas, so Mom hadn’t been able to keep up with current events).

My mother had a little trouble with dates toward the end; when asked what year it was, she kept saying 1992. But if asked who the President was, she was able to correctly answer “Barack Obama.” I asked her once why she kept thinking it was 1992. She said “I guess because that was the last time someone I liked was President.” I’m glad that she was able to live to see another Democrat in the White House.

My mother was always a Boston Red Sox fan, having grown up in Massachusetts. She was born in 1918, the year they had last won the World Series – shortly before she was born. I too was a Red Sox fan for much of my life, until I met my husband, a Yankees fan. But I still have a soft spot in my heart for the Red Sox. I was glad my mother lived to see the Sox win not just one more championship, but two, before she died. My mother never gave up hope, and in the end, her optimism paid off.

Of course, another trait I get from Mom is my love of animals. My father had never had a pet when he was young, so it was Mom who brought in our first one, a beautiful tortoiseshell/tiger cat named Boots. She quickly became “his” cat but of course I loved her too. I was only about 3 when we got her so I grew up with her. Later we got another cat named Silly (I named him Silver Gray for his color, not very original – but we called him Silly). Still later, when I was 9, came our Pekingese dog, Suki, and then Mittens, a kitten I got on a sleepover at someone’s farm with my Girl Scout troop. Since my childhood, I’ve never been able to think of a house being a home without a pet, thanks to my mother.

Until the end of her life my mother always had a cat – the last one is Zoe, a tiny little 15-year-old orange tiger cat who has outlived her and will be coming to stay with us now. I know when my mother was in the hospital and nursing home for her rehab she missed Zoe a lot, as she kept looking for her and wondering where she was. I was happy to be able to see her sitting in her chair with Zoe in her lap those last couple of months. At least she got home to see her again.

Both of my parents gave me my love of writing and all things medical. Since both of them were medical writers, medical subjects were always discussed in our house, and medical books were around constantly.

My mother may have stopped working when I was born, but her love of writing continued to influence her life and was passed on to me. It is because of her I know the difference between “lay” and “lie,” “might” and “may,” and many other grammatical rules. One of her pet peeves was the use of “of” when it wasn’t needed – as in, “it’s not that big of a deal.” To the last, she corrected me on that. Another usage she deplored was the use of “anymore” without a negative. For instance, “He’s really tired anymore.” Correctly it should be used only with a negative, such as “He doesn’t have any energy anymore.” A few years ago I even encouraged her to write some blog posts which I posted on a blog I opened for her – it is still on Blogspot, here: Marge's Words to the Wise.

I can also credit my mother with my choice of a college – her own Simmons College. Originally I hadn’t intended to go to the same school my mother did; but once she took me up to Boston I fell in love with the area and I liked the campus and the people I met there. It is also a women’s college, and I am very grateful for having gone there, since I think the supportive atmosphere of a woman’s college is what I needed to come out of my shell and give me the confidence I sorely lacked during high school. Although originally a Biology major, I soon fell back to a more natural talent – writing – and majored in Journalism. The apple didn’t fall far from the tree, even though my career was in market research. Good writing is important in any job.

My love of travel I can also trace to my mother. I think if my father had been on his own he probably wouldn’t have gone anywhere outside the metro area. My mother first introduced him, and then me, to her beloved Cape Cod, where she’d been vacationing since she was a child. But then she branched out and we made two trips to England and Scotland, as she had always loved all things Scottish, which she traced to the small amount of Wallace blood she had in her ancestry. Then when I was older, she and my dad went on to travel to various places in Europe, including a trip to Paris and Amsterdam that she always remembered fondly. I think her favorite trip was to Israel in 1990. She was proud that she swam in the Dead Sea and saw all the historic sites in Jerusalem.

Once I met DH and we started traveling together, we took my parents to Scotland twice for visits to my mother’s favorite country. She loved seeing all the old places she remembered and her beautiful “green velvet mountains,” as she called them.

Last, I’d have to say that any optimistic attitudes I have about life come from my mother. She always saw the bright side of every dark cloud, and truly seemed to believe that bad things would never happen. Even to the end I don’t think she really believed her smoking had anything to do with her lung problems. You can call it denial or you can call it optimism – I’ll choose to call it optimism.

My mother was always disappointed I never had children. Although she has grandchildren through my half-sister Joy, they are of course only related to our father and not by blood to her. She sometimes bemoaned the fact that I will have no one to pass on our few family heirlooms to, and that her family line would die out with me. She said that my having children would have been her “immortality.”

I disagree. Whether or not there is an afterlife – and let’s face it, no one knows for sure – anyone’s immortality is probably best expressed by how their lives affected others who came in contact with them when they were here on earth. Each of us is like a pebble thrown in a pond – the concentric ripples that come out from the center reach far beyond the one pebble, and roll toward distant shores.

I like to think of all the girls my mother came in contact with during her years as a Girl Scout leader, and how they are now passing her love of nature down to their own children – or their own Girl Scout troops – and beyond. I like to think that even my humble efforts at blogging, which would have never happened without the interest in writing that was passed on to me, may influence someone somewhere about some subject that I’ve written about. We never know what we do that will affect someone else, and that is the beauty of the kind of immortality I’m talking about.

I remember once a long time ago I asked my mother if she was afraid of dying, or did she ever think about death, and she said no, she didn’t worry about that; she felt there would “always be a little more time.” I think she thought that to the very end too, which is why I told her I’d take her to the Cape later in the summer just as she was breathing her last. I wanted her to go out thinking she still had that little bit more time.

I hope somewhere, she is having a lot more time. But I won’t know until my own time comes.

Below is the sunset over the pond at Cape Cod, which my husband took the night my mother died. She would be happy to know there was a beautiful sunset in her honor, as she always loved a good sunset.

Doom and Destruction of Biblical Proportions?

H/T to DistributorCap for pointing out that the verse in Revelation 8:8-9 is eerily similar to the idea of a huge oil rig blowing up, catching fire, and spewing oil into the ocean.



8 The second angel blew his trumpet, and something like a great mountain, burning with fire, was thrown into the sea, and a third of the sea became blood. 9 A third of the living creatures in the sea died, and a third of the ships were destroyed.

As you know, I am not a particularly religious person, but even if the Bible is not true, then it is still a strange coincidence and quite chilling.

And the next verse is even worse - look out for a falling meteor or nuclear bomb or something hitting the earth next:

8:10 And the third angel sounded, and there fell from heaven a great star, burning as a torch, and it fell upon the third part of the rivers, and upon the fountains of the waters; 8:11 And the name of the star is called Wormwood: and the third part of the waters became wormwood; and many men died of the waters, because they were made bitter.

Let's hope this doesn't happen next. But the way things are going, who can tell?

Please go read DCap's post - he really sums up the whole horrible situation very eloquently - and scathingly. If we don't pay attention this time, our world may very well be doomed.

She's Not Dead Yet!

Monty Python's classic "Bring Out Your Dead" clip pretty much describes how my day at the hospital nearly went.

My mother had a bad setback two days ago. As many of you know, she was rehospitalized a week ago with dehydration and high potassium but she had been making progress, was eating about as well as she usually does, and was doing OK using a Bi-Pap machine to help her breathe except when she was eating, since it involves a mask over her face.

So I had gone to the hospital around suppertime since that was when I could talk to her without her wearing the mask, plus I could help her eat. So there I was, trying to be the ever-helpful daughter, and coaxing her to eat and drink more. She was having a little trouble with choking a bit on her food and said she didn't want anymore, so I encouraged her to have a sip of milk. She sipped it and at first she seemed fine but then started to cough. Not a big deal for anyone who has something go down the wrong way, but because of her weak lungs she was having trouble getting it out. I asked someone to get the nurse, thinking perhaps she needed some suction or something to help her, when suddenly she just flopped over.

After I tried to wake her up I went and got the nurse, who came in and checked her pulse and found there was none. In a split second I had to decide whether to have her revived or not, and since I felt responsible for the whole thing, decided to have her receive a full "code." I was kind of crowded into the back of the room so I just sat there calmly while all this went on around me, as if I were an extra in an "ER" episode playing the part of the concerned family member. (No, they didn't need to use the paddles or yell "Clear!" so apparently it wasn't that hard to bring her back with some CPR and epinephrine.)

Naturally she was entubated to be able to keep oxygen going to her brain during all of this, so they took her back to the ICU and put her on a ventilator. She woke up and was aware of her surroundings, and the next day, although not able to talk due to the ventilator, she was perfectly cognizant and able to nod yes or no and express things with her eyes and hands.

But immediately the resident doctors who are in the ICU began asking me what the next step would be if she couldn't get off the ventilator. I had decided I didn't want her resuscitated a second time, and signed a paper stating that. I also knew I didn't want her to have a tracheostomy, where they would put a hole in her throat to assiste her breathing so that at least she could talk again. But she would have to have it for the rest of her life and it sounded like a very uncomfortable procedure with a limited outcome, given her age and condition.

She did well overnight but when they tried to wean her off the ventilator yesterday they said she couldn't come off it yet. The resident again asked me what my next step would be. She said they didn't usually keep them on a ventilator more than 3 days if there isn't an ability to take them off. Her recommendation was the tracheostomy which I had decided not to do.

We waited till today and went to see her and another resident asked me bluntly if we had made a decision yet on the ventilator. My mother, you have to understand, at this point is doing fine on the ventilator - oxygen levels, heart rate, blood pressure all good. The only problem is they don't think she can go off of it. My aunt and I came back later on and told this resident that yes, we would try taking her off it and that we understood she might not survive. I did say I'd like to talk to the attending physician first.

Lo and behold, the pulmonologist came in to the room and said Mom is doing OK - that she is 91 years old and will naturally take longer to come back and be able to get off the vent. He said he certainly saw no reason to rush into anything without giving it a few more days. They had started giving her liquid nourishment (since she can't eat with the vent in her throat) and he said this may give her more strength and she'll better withstand the removal of the vent.

Thank goodness he came in and told me this. I had made up my mind to be resolute and get this done for my mother's own good, thinking there would be no other choice. I know she hates the thing being down her throat and she did say yes (nodding and even writing it on a piece of paper) when I asked her if she wanted it off "no matter what" and gave her a pretty good idea that if it didn't work, that would be it.

But as it turned out, once again, "reports of her death were exaggerated." It is my belief that residents, no matter how skillful and and well-intentioned, should not be the doctors discussing end-of-life decisions with the family. They don't have enough experience to know what may or may not happen in specific circumstances. They only know the protocols and procedures they have been taught and only have limited experience in real life situations.

This is another example of the failure of our health care system and another reason "end-of-life" discussions should be covered in our healthcare as a matter of course, so that we get a better opportunity to talk about all of the pros and cons of a situation with a team of knowledgable professionals.

I am not blaming only the resident; I experienced a similar situation last time she was hospitalized with the pulmonologist who is the partner of the one I spoke to today (I like to call him "Dr. Death.") He practically convinced me my mother was not long for the world when she was in the hospital last time. She came home and lived two months at home after that, enjoying her day-to-day life; she had Easter dinner and Mother's Day celebrations over at our house, as well as enjoying a lovely lobster dinner sitting outside on our deck, with us, her stepdaughter (my half-sister) and her husband, who came up to see her from South Carolina earlier this month.

I sometimes wonder whether doctors realize how influential their attitudes can be on these types of decisions. In the case of Dr. Death, I got the distinct impression he disapproved when I told him I had not signed a DNR on my mother at that time. Guess he thought at 91 she wasn't worth saving, or knew that even if she recovered this time, she'd be back again soon - and of course, she was.

But what these doctors don't realize is that even a couple of months can be worthwhile for a person that age - another enjoyable family get-together, another chance to smell flowers and feel the breeze on her face. It isn't the quantity of the time, but the quality.

I second-guessed myself somewhat after I had them resuscitate my mother the other day. It had been very peaceful and I wondered if I'd done the right thing by having them revive her. But she did come out of it with her brain intact and as a result, at least my aunt, her sister, was able to come in and visit her and talk to her again. These things are important, both for the ill person and for the family.

I'm not saying anything against anyone who has made the choice, with or without a discussion with their loved one, not to pursue aggressive treatment. Each choice should be individual and based on the feelings of both the patient and their family.

But the doctors' influence should be kept to a minimum. The doctor should tell the family and the patient what the pros and cons are, what the prognosis is, what they might expect depending on what course of action they take, and then let the patient and the family decide. The family should not be rushed in this decision and should be given as much time as is needed, as long as the patient is not suffering.

Just thought I should share this experience in case anyone else has been struggling with this type of situation. There are no easy answers, but be aware that you need to get plenty of second opinions before making a decision. You don't want your loved one to be put in the position of yelling, "But I'm not dead yet!"

It's a Shanda

"Shanda" is Yiddish for "shame." But it has a further connotation of disgrace or outrage. It's a better word for what is going on in the Gulf than simple "shame." People use "shame" for trivial matters - "It's a shame it had to rain over the weekend." A shanda is a bigger deal.

In today's NY Times, Bob Herbert talks about the bigger ramifications of the oil "spill" (gusher) in the Gulf.

He points out that the livelihoods of thousands of people are at risk, to say nothing of all the types of wildlife that depend on the wetlands along Louisiana's coast.

"The vast, sprawling coastal marshes of Louisiana, where the Mississippi River drains into the gulf, are among the finest natural resources to be found anywhere in the world. And they are a positively crucial resource for America. Think shrimp estuaries and bird rookeries and oyster fishing grounds.

These wetlands are one of the nation’s most abundant sources of seafood. And they are indispensable when it comes to the nation’s bird population. Most of the migratory ducks and geese in the United States spend time in the Louisiana wetlands as they travel to and from Latin America.

Think songbirds. Paul Harrison, a specialist on the Mississippi River and its environs at the Environmental Defense Fund, told me that the wetlands are relied on by all 110 neo-tropical migratory songbird species. The migrating season for these beautiful, delicate creatures is right now — as many as 25 million can pass through the area each day."

I think of the wonderful variety of birds I have been seeing and hearing in the woods near our cabin, and wonder whether they will be there next year.

So far no one has managed to stop the oil from continuing to pour into the once-pristine waters of the Gulf of Mexico. How long can this go on? How many people have to die, how many birds and animals must perish, before America says "enough"?

I know the government is doing things to try to help and that BP is supposedly trying to stop it. But this is a disaster of such magnitude that ordinary effort is not enough. This should be an all-out assault on that oil leak.

Has the government done enough? Maybe, maybe not.

According to the May 8 Times Picayune, President Obama's administration did respond appropriately and quickly to the disaster as it became apparent that it was a bigger problem than originally believed.

"While the Obama administration has faced second-guessing about the speed and effectiveness of some of its actions, a narrative pieced together by The Associated Press, based on documents, interviews and public statements, shows little resemblance to Katrina in either the characterization of the threat or the federal government's response."

And according to Reuters, the government doesn't have the oil industry skills needed to be of any real help:

"The federal government, not in the oil well business, is limited by what direct impact it can have on stopping the leak. The U.S. military does not have skills in the oil sector and officials have stressed the Pentagon is already providing whatever support it can to assist the U.S. response to the disaster.

The Obama administration has piled heavy pressure on BP to speed up its efforts to plug it up. 'We are continuing to push BP to do everything that it can,' said White House spokesman Robert Gibbs."

But is pushing BP enough? BP is the company that brought us this disaster in the first place. They won't want to spend any more money than they have to to clean it up.

And why doesn't the federal government have more ability to stop this leak? Surely our navy has some equipment, some expertise in deep underwater maneuvers, that could be helpful in plugging that hole that is gushing oil a mile underwater. And if not, why not? We have the most powerful navy in the world. Wouldn't you think they would have some knowledge of how to deal with things in the deepest depths of the ocean?

Of course the Republicans don't come off looking good here, not surprisingly. They recently blocked legislation that would have raised the cap on BP's monetary liability from $75 million to $10 billion.

On the other hand, the Obama administration is still playing both sides against the middle on this. Interior Secretary Salazar recently told Congress that too high a cap might endanger the smaller independent oil companies, the same argument given by the GOP.

I can't help thinking that no one is doing enough about this disaster.

Bob Herbert expresses the same feeling, that there has not been a strong enough response to this disaster, either by the Obama administration, or, for that matter, by the public. I mean, why aren't people marching on Washington demanding something more be done?

"The response of the Obama administration and the general public to this latest outrage at the hands of a giant, politically connected corporation has been embarrassingly tepid. We take our whippings in stride in this country. We behave as though there is nothing we can do about it."

While much of the coziness between the government and the oil companies that led us to this place can be blamed on the Republicans, not all of it can be. The Democrats are equally to blame for not overseeing the industry more carefully now that they are in power, and instead just let things go along as before. And many of them were pretty cozy with the oil industry to begin with. As Herbert says,

"The risks unleashed by the explosion of the Deepwater Horizon oil rig are profound — the latest to be set in motion by the scandalous, rapacious greed of the oil industry and its powerful allies and enablers in government. America is selling its soul for oil."

Of course, I'm not sure America still has a soul to sell these days, but if there's a little something left of it, it will soon be gone if something isn't done to fix this mess and prevent future similar disasters. It's a shanda.

A Cat's Eye View: Baxter's Back

Baxter here. Hoo boy, it's been a long month since my Human last posted here. A lot of Water has gone under the Bridge, as the saying goes. Or maybe I should say, a lot of OIL has gone under the Bridge.

I Apologize for My long Absence here. My Female Human has been Too Preoccupied with her Mother to pay much attention to Me or her Blog. Funny, though, she always has time for that Facebook thing. I myself have a Catbook page but I really never got into it Much.

To be Honest, the main Reason I have time to be on the Computer is because my Human has a Day to Herself and can help Me. It's not for a Good Reason, but it is still a Day to Herself. Her Mother had to go to the Emergency Room of the local Hospital yesterday due to Dehydration. She has been admitted to the Hospital and is doing Well. However, my Human is not sure what to do when her Mother gets Out, as it seems as if, more and more, she really may belong in a Nursing Home due to her Frail Condition. Plus her 89-year-old Aunt has been helping with her Mother's care at home, and my Human is afraid it is starting to Stress Her Out too.

As a Cat, I can't really Comment, but I did spend some Time in the Cat equivalent of a Nursing Home, I suppose you could say. I was at a cat rescue called HAAL (short for Humane Animal Adoption League) before my Humans brought me home. The HAAL Humans were very nice to Us and let us out of our Cages to Play and took Very Good Care of Us. While of course I Prefer being in a whole House, it was Pleasant there. (If You are feeling Generous, please do click on the Link and learn more, and if you can Donate to them, I'm sure they would Appreciate it Deeply.)

My Human also wants me to tell You how much she Appreciates everyone's comments and Good Wishes for her and her Mother. She feels Very Blessed to have so many Friends here in the Interwebs.

As for Me, I have a lot of Catching Up to do on Current Events. As mentioned above, the Biggest Story to me in the past Month is the Horrendous Oil Explosion in the Gulf that is Still Going On.

How those Idiots at BP let this Happen I don't know. But as a Cat, I feel Fellowship with all of the Life in the Gulf that is being Devastated by this continuing Debacle, and it makes me Very Sad. If an Oil Company doesn't know what they would do if their Stupid Oil Well blew up and caused all the Oil to spout out into the Ocean, then they Darn Well shouldn't be Drilling down there in the First Place. Period. And the Government shouldn't be letting Them!

I won't get into all the Stupid things I've heard about - batteries missing and Whatnot, How to Stop It, and Who is to blame. But I'll let Jon Stewart explain it All for you:

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
There Will Be Blame
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Tea Party

In Other News, there was That Day when the Dow Jones Average tanked almost a Thousand Points and still No One really Knows Why. That was Scary. Luckily for my Humans' 401ks, it did Rebound Somewhat by the end of the Day. My Female Human happened to be watching CNN at the time it happened, and she saw her Retirement pass before her Eyes for a few minutes there.

Also during this past Month, President Obama nominated Elena Kagan to the Supreme Court, receiving both Pats on the Head and whacks with the Rolled-Up Newspaper from Both Sides. Liberals are Worried she isn't Liberal Enough, and of Course, the Right would never think ANYONE the President nominated would be Conservative enough. We Cats tend to be Very Liberal, so in My View she probably isn't Liberal Enough. It seems as if the Republicans never have any Compunction about nominating people that are to the Right of Genghis Kahn, while Democrats are afraid to go anywhere but Slightly Left of Center at the Most when they nominate a Justice, resulting in a Court that shifts increasingly Rightward.

However, Elena Kagan hasn't really left enough of a Paper Trail to keep her from being Nominated or even give the Liberals any real reason to Worry. I say, give her the Benefit of the Doubt and hope she is more Liberal than she lets on. That happens sometimes even when a Justice is appointed by the Republicans. Let's hope it works for the Dems too.

I shall End with one of my Cheery and Uplifting stories so as to leave You on a Positive Note. My Human told me about this so I thought I'd pass it on to You. She was walking That Dog the other Morning, and as they started to pass a Garbage Can on the Street, she noticed that the white plastic garbage bag in the can was Wiggling, as if Something was Stuck Inside and trying to get Out! Holes at the bottom of the bag showed where the Creature had gotten in, but it wasn't smart enough to go Back the Way it Came.

A Man walking his dog approached, and my Human called his Attention to the bag. "I think there's a squirrel or something stuck inside that bag!" she said.

He looked while That Dog and his dog started sniffing hello. My Human said she was worried because the Garbage Truck would be along shortly. The Man looked around and got a long Stick and came back and started Poking the bag with it. He said, "I think it's a bird!" Suddenly the bag tore, and flying out of it came a large, disgruntled Starling! He took off indignantly, as if it were Their fault that he was stuck inside.

"We did our good deed for the day!" said the Man, and continued on with his dog, as did my Female Human. One less thing to Worry About.

Personally, I think they should have brought the Bag Home to Me so I could deal with that Starling!

In the Meantime, I'm going to add Beer to the Catnip I regularly Consume just to get through the latest News Events. Sometimes you need more Sedation than Others. Hang in there, and maybe Things will Improve.

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Alone Time

A month ago yesterday my mother came home from the nursing home where she was having rehabilitation.

As usual in such situations, the nursing home gave very little warning that her Medicare coverage was being withdrawn because she had "stopped progressing" in her rehabilitation. There was a "family meeting" on a Friday and I was informed that she had to leave by the following Wednesday, March 24, and oh, by the way, she needs 24/7 care now.

I don't mean to be cranky about this; it is the way things work, and nursing homes can get in trouble with Medicare if they let a patient stay longer just because it isn't convenient for them to come home so soon.

Be that as it may, it basically gave me two business days to set up care for my mother and make arrangements for whatever she would need when she returned to her apartment.

Luckily, with the help of information supplied by the nursing home administrator, I was able to line up overnight care for my mother through an agency, and did receive all of the necessary equipment in time for her return to her studio apartment. She needs to be on oxygen, so that included an oxygen concentrator machine, as well as a wheelchair, a walker, and a hospital bed so her feet could be put up at night.

At first I had the overnight aides coming at 9 p.m. and leaving at 9 a.m., but that meant I had to rush over there by 9 a.m. every morning, seven days a week. If I wanted to get away for an hour here or there I had to get my long-suffering husband or my aunt (who luckily lives one floor above my mother) to come Mom-sit. I am so grateful to both of them for all their help. My husband has come over to Mom's apartment and made us all dinner or we've brought her to our house and had dinner together a number of times, and he is always ready and willing to lend a hand.

I eventually changed the aides' hours to 11 p.m. to 11 a.m., which gave me back my mornings, and hired another aide privately three evenings a week so I could escape by 7 p.m. for a more normal evening.

The rest of the time I've been spending with my mother. And I'm happy to report that mentally she has improved remarkably since she got out of the nursing home. It makes me realize how important it is that health coverage for seniors should include at-home care instead of only nursing home care.

No matter how good a nursing home may be (and the one she was at was lovely and the people couldn't have been nicer) it is still not the same as being in familiar surroundings. Some people do well in a nursing home, if they're naturally gregarious and enjoy having a lot of activity around them. My mother isn't one of them. She found the ongoing commotion confusing and the soap operas her roommate favored on television made her think people all around her were in terrible predicaments. Her roommate also watched the Catholic Mass on television and I'd come to visit my mother and she'd be expecting me to take her to church. So I'm so grateful she was able to come home and is getting back to her normal self. And I'm lucky I was able to retire just when my mother needed me.

However, I had no idea how all-consuming being a caregiver can be. I figured if I did the daytime care, I'd be able to sit and blog or play on Facebook or read a book, chatting occasionally with my mother and making her meals. No such luck. For one thing, my mother's eyesight has gotten too bad for her to read, so she is only able to watch (mostly listen to) television, so I feel kind of bad reading while she can't. The other reason is that just as I might be getting into something, either in a book or on the computer, Mom has a request..."Could you please put another pillow behind my back?" or "I need to go to the bathroom." She can walk by herself but needs help.

Sometimes she'll take a nap but inevitably just as I'm settling in to watch one of my own personal guilty pleasures (such as one of HGTV's home makeovers or a cooking show) she'll wake up and want to get up again.

Mom loves MSNBC and CNN so that's what's on most of the day. I am now more well-informed on political issues than I ever was before. And I'm grateful that she is into politics because we have that in common and now that she's coming around again mentally we can discuss the issues, and it's great.

But the only problem is these programs are all covering the same Big Stories every day, multiple times. One day they kept showing a speech by Sarah Palin campaigning for John McCain that nearly drove me insane. If I had to hear her screechy annoying voice once more I might have lost control. I finally had to switch to a public television station and watch a cooking show, much to my mother's dismay.

The other thing that takes up a lot of time is dealing with the comings and goings of the aides, and the visiting nurse who comes twice a week but I never know when until a half hour before when she calls to say she's on her way. Plus there was a physical therapist who came three times a week for the first month. And on top of that I had to get Mom to two different doctor appointments during this past month when she was still quite unsteady and needed the wheelchair.

At first I was doing fine with all of this, but then it started to wear on me and as my mother got better and I was no longer expecting her to die at any moment, I found myself getting cranky to her by the late afternoon, and then of course feeling really guilty about it.

I found the cocktail hour was getting earlier each day. I'd go home for an hour while my aunt sat with Mom and I would walk the dog and then sneak a glass of wine on the deck, sitting in the sun. Or I'd bring a bottle over to Mom's and have two or three glasses of wine while she'd have her evening sherry, which she is now able to enjoy once again. I'd get an evening off and go out with friends and drink way more than usual just to de-stress.

I started having trouble sleeping, waking up in the middle of the night confused, worrying about my mother, sometimes not even sure if I was in my own house after being at her apartment all day.

I finally realize what my problem is - I'm not good at being with anybody all day long. I was brought up as an only child and I need my alone time!

So I'm finally having some this weekend. I managed to get two aides to cover the daytime with my mother, and the usual overnight aides are covering the nights. And we headed off to our cabin in the Adirondacks for three nights.

On the way up Route 22 from Whitehall to our turnoff there was a large male turkey in the middle of the road, strutting his stuff, showing off for a modest female who was at the side of the road, studiously pretending to ignore him. We had to wait while he ambled off the road.

Then came the turn toward our cabin, and then we were going up the familiar gravel road. As we pulled into the property in the early twilight we saw our personal Great Horned Owl fly across the pond from one tree to another. Later that night we heard him calling in the woods.

This weekend was the first time we were able to get to the cabin since the first weekend in December, and we were pleased to find it just as we left it. No one broke in, no trees fell on it, and it didn't burn in our absence. Within a half hour of arriving, we had the propane flowing, the generator generating, the well pump pumping, and the water running.

We've managed to have beautiful weather even though at home it is now raining. Somehow we always manage to get lucky with the weather.

Ed's dad joined us on Saturday and he has been enjoying his own escape - from visiting the nursing home where Ed's mom is every day, twice a day. No matter how much you love someone, you need time away in order to get back to them again with your patience intact.

When I return to the "real world," I'll need to reconsider the care my mother is getting, as the expense is untenable. We will be getting her on Medicaid shortly, but it won't cover the amount of care she has been receiving.

Somehow there has to be a balance achieved between leaving her alone some of the time but not endangering her welfare. I don't know yet what that balance will be. As she has improved I think she may be able to stay alone at night but won't know until I stay there myself and see how she is.

Long-term care is another area of our health care system that desperately needs reform. As the Baby Boomers age, I am hoping our generation will take on this task because you know we will not be willing to go gentle into that good night without making some major changes in how we are treated on that last journey!

Naturally from my constant exposure to news programs over the past month, I have a lot of fodder for commentary here but first wanted to let you all know why my posts have been so few and far between.

I am incensed about the new immigration law in Arizona, am glad that President Obama will get to appoint another Supreme Court Justice, and have lots of other opinions on various subjects to share. Baxter too is waiting patiently to get his turn to blog, so either he or I will be back soon to do so!

It's Too Late Baby - But I'll Blog Against Theocracy Anyway

I just revisited the Blog Against Theocracy site and realized it says that no posts will be accepted after April 5th. Unfortunately I was unable to get to writing about this important subject until today. I will try to link to it anyway.

As some of you know, I have become the caretaker of my 91-year-old mother, Marge. She's a great lady and is doing much better since she's been home rather than in an instutional setting. However, her frailty does make her care a fairly time-consuming and and relatively exhausting job. Thank goodness for the aides that come to keep an eye on her at night. During the day she is pretty with-it and we have a good time chatting. Her sense of humor is still there and we are doing well. But it doesn't allow me much time or energy to blog.

Where shall I begin about the issue of theocracy in this country? I've written about this before but it seems as if the situation is getting worse. What with the Texas School Board trying to change the textbooks to go along with their version of reality, which is based on religious beliefs rather than science, and those who refuse to vote for the health care bill if the insurance companies cover abortion, "theocracy" is everywhere these days. Where do people get the nerve to say they won't let their taxes fund an abortion paid for through a private insurance company? After all, my taxes pay for wars, and I don't believe in them either. If everyone got to choose exactly what their taxes pay for I don't think much would get done.

We have moved from the silliness of lawsuits over whether or not to allow religious statues on public property or plaques of the Ten Commandments to be displayed in front of a town hall, to more important issues. Now it's coming down to whether our children will be educated properly or not; it's come down to arguing over what someone's taxes cover or not. The religious people in this country are overwhelming the secular side of our society.

What really gets me is, it is the Christians, who outnumber any other religion in this country by a huge majority, that claim their rights are being trampled every time something isn't done their way. They don't understand that freedom of speech and religion means that you are free to practice your own religion without infringement. It does not mean that you have the right to force YOUR religion on other people.

The whole issue of gay marriage is a good example of why we need separation of church and state. There is no logical reason why gay couples shouldn't benefit from the blessings of the government in terms of joint property, laws of inheritance, visiting privileges at hospitals, and all of the other rights that heterosexual married couples take for granted.

The only reason to deny same-sex couples these rights is found in the Bible, where believers claim that "God" doesn't approve of same-sex couples. This is a religious context, not a civic context.

The solution would be to allow any couple of consenting adults to marry in a civic ceremony. If religion comes into it, then they are welcome to also be married in the church of their choice. Some churches may choose to marry same-sex couples, some may not. But that is a private, religious context. The civic context should not be consigned to the same rules.

Interestingly, just today I had a chat with one of my mother's aides who comes in to help out for two hours twice a week. She is of Mexican descent and I had assumed she was Catholic. However, we got into a discussion of religion and it turned out she had been "saved" in a Protestant religion in 2001 before 9/11. As a result, she believes the Bible is the word of God and everything in it is true.

She brought up the idea of gay marriage and I said I was in favor of it since I believe God would want people who love each other to be able to pledge their lives to each other. She said that the Bible doesn't allow for that, it's not natural and that with God, all things are possible, so anyone who is gay could change if they believed.

Naturally I didn't get into a big argument about this (I do need her to take care of my mother), but it made me think. There are a lot of people out there who really believe that the Bible actually is the word-for-word "Word of God" and because of that they are willing to consign a whole group of people to second-class status. If these people continue to gain power in our government and our civic organizations such as school boards, our country is going to fall further and further behind, what with rejecting evolution, believing gay people are "unnatural" and many other beliefs that are not consistent with science or good sense.

Organized religion in general has a tendency to become corrupt, or at the very least, the participants tend to protect the organization rather than the beliefs on which it is founded. Look at the scandals in the Catholic Church. I'm sure none of those in charge feel good about the terrible things that some priests have done to young children. But rather than expose those priests and the church to public scrutiny, they hid this behavior and just transferred the priests elsewhere. As a result, there is now a sitting Pope who may have conspired in this cover-up and the church is in crisis.

If even a church cannot stay pure, how could incorporating religion into government have any better result?