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Ria Bacon: editor & writer

Linguist with wanderlust,
From the hills of New Guinea to the halls of the Sorbonne,
From the beaches of Bassam to the fields of Friesland,
From the catacombs of Rome to the Blue Mountains of Jamaica.
From the heather of the Veluwe to the dust of Dakar ...

Currently resident in the Land of Sea with a small tribe of kids and Mr B.

FYI

Stet means "Let it stand" and is used by editors to indicate that the original text should be left untouched.

...in Arcadia ego is a pun on a painting by Poussin.

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Life imitates art

Last night’s news was dominated by coverage of the Dutch royal family’s visit to our proud little city on Queen’s Day (Koninginnedag). Security was ratcheted up to DEFCON 1 as a result of the car attack on the family during last year’s celebrations in Apeldoorn.

Mr B went into town with our oldest two, and had a hard time getting near the market place. Hundreds of police had been bussed in to block every winding lane in the city centre. And those who had gotten through were corralled into pens that prevented them from following the royalty after they walked passed. The TV news showed a couple of vox pops where
locals claimed they agreed with the high security measures, but Mr B heard plenty of disgruntled voices behind the barricades.

By the time I got there — children #3 and #4 have overlapping naps which take up a large part of the day — the royals had left, as had most of the visitors, which just left lots of police officers standing around.

Police overmanning on Queen's Day

No loitering!: Police ambush squad spring into nonchalance as suspect approaches, the only person not wearing orange on Queen’s Day in the Netherlands.

Going back to the news last night, the final item caught my attention: it appeared to be a very realistic first-person shooter game, à la Modern Warfare 2, with commandos rappelling from a helicopter onto a ship, and stalking round corners and obstacles looking for targets. In fact it was a video that had just been released by the Dutch Ministry of Defence and showed Dutch marines storming a cargo ship that had been hijacked by Somali pirates. The images were captured from a helmet camera, with a viewpoint that put the viewer in the thick of the action. It was a striking example of how game technology has permeated our perception of events, a contemporary case of anti-mimesis, as described by Oscar Wilde: “Life imitates Art far more than Art imitates Life.”

See for yourself.

By the time I saw the news round midnight, the video had already been blogged and a rough translation provided for the team leader’s commentary:

The marine boarding team received orders to liberate the fifteen crewmen of the merchant Taipan, which was hijacked by ten pirates. The captain and crew of the German-flagged Taipan had locked themselves in their safe room, from where they called for assistance.

The sensor-operator deploys the fast ropeline while the team leader provides covering fire with the MAG GPMG.

Note the ‘landing zone’ of the marines; enough cover to prevent hostile fire, yet not too much to obstruct cover fire. In that respect they were lucky that it was a container ship, and not some bulk-cargo carrier.

Approaching the bridge, they detained six pirates hiding at the lower deck. The marines ordered the pirates to climb through the shot window. Two more pirates were found hiding at the aft deck, and subsequently arrested. A ninth was found on the deck above, and summoned to come down.

A three-man team secured the bridge, and from there they went through the rest of the ship. The marine team-leader further comments on the ravage the pirates caused in their search for valuables, which included shooting up doors and cabinets which were locked.

The weapons the pirates used ranged from handguns, AK-47s, and RPG-7s.

Once the ship was secured the crew of the Taipan came out of the safe room.
(Translation source: Marcase)

The team leader adds that the crew gave them a round of applause, “They were really happy to see us.”

I bet.

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Orange was the color

In between the creche and the day job is Balans, a cobbled street that splits at a hilltop, curves behind the Abbey walls and rejoins in front of St Joris, built in 1582. And within Balans is a small fountain with four jets shooting straight up. Best appreciated by students who love throwing in a pack of washing powder and watching the foam, the Mayor’s office has decided to include the fountain in the city’s royal festivities next week by colouring the water orange, the symbol of the Netherlands, still nominally ruled by the House of Orange.

In between the creche and the day job, I pulled the car over and dusted off my camera for a couple of shots:

Orange sets the tone for the visit of the Queen

With the royal visit drawing near, the fountain by the Abbey walls has taken on a patriotic colour.

Fanta coloured foaming fountains

Imagine it was Fanta!

The previous night being Students’ Night (Thursday), the fountain was foaming with suds whiter than white, but with the water turned orange for the Queen’s visit, my son licked his lips and grinned: “Imagine it was Fanta!”

1 comment to Orange was the color

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Your partner in meat

With the return of the good weather, notwithstanding volcanic ash clouds from Iceland, we are once again confronted with the annoyance of having to share our transport network with slow-moving boats. Our island is bisected by a canal, which itself is broken into a series of locks and low bridges.

The result is that every so often — every 30 minutes in high season — road traffic comes to a halt when the bridges lift up or swing open to allow yachts and other pleasure craft to pass through. It’s intensely frustrating as the whole process takes around 20 minutes, and drivers in a hurry to get to class, pick up kids or any other pressing business (that’s me, me & me) have to switch off the motor and watch some elderly twats chugging Liebfraumilch on motor cruisers.

It’s not as if the canal goes anywhere or gives access to essential facilities, and in terms of time, with all the locks and bridges, they’d be much faster sailing round the island than going through it. But I guess the value is the journey travelled rather than the destination … twats.

While I was waiting early one morning, drumming my fingers on the steering wheel in frustration and anxiously checking if I would have enough time to buy three tubes of Rolos before class, as part of my Ph.D research into student motivation (Tip: Rolos work), I was drawn to the slogan on the van in front of me:

Your partner in meat

My collaborator, of course, supplier of saucisse … and yet the longer I stared …

Your partner in meat …

It sounded like a ransom note threatening extreme consequences for non-cooperation.

Your partner … encased in mince
or
transformed into meatloaf

Either way it’s gross.

As far as bad slogans go, it’s on a par with one from my school years in the north of England, that of a removal company:

Moving a thing? Give us a ring!

I loved its vague assertiveness, its catch-all service — Well, I’m moving this glass to the dishwasher, so maybe I should call …

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Dyscalculia

On the occasion of her eleventh birthday, my daughter announced that I was 50,000 days old. It had taken her a little quiet time to come up with this figure, and despite my immediate rebuttal, she insisted her calculation was correct.

So turns out I’m about to celebrate my 137th birthday.

Makes sense.

I feel old …

1 comment to Dyscalculia

  • BERJAYA Paul Sullivan

    Any idea where I might find a poem with the line: “He was an & it” (he was an ass to risk it)?

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A man, a woman, a 'tache

Translating agricultural development articles doesn’t often make me break out into a smile, so I was particularly pleased to discover this evening that the Chief Executive of the Seychelles Agricultural Agency goes by the wonderful name of Antoine Marie Moustache. It’s the mother lode of tease.

And then there’s his job: with a land mass of only 455 square miles spread over 115 tiny islands and coral outcrops, the title seems to rival that of Swiss Admiral*.

Determined to find more about Mr Moustache, I tracked down his M.Phil thesis at another of my old stomping grounds, the University of the West Indies: Fertilizer use in Cabbage with Special Reference to Urea-N.

– Irie! U-Ria! Why y’hafta pee on de cabbage dem?

– Yeah man, me drink me root juice
an’ forget de damn waterin’ can an’ ting.

(Read previous work-related highlights and other barely plausible names.)

* What’s the difference between a Dyson vacuum cleaner and a Swiss Admiral?
A Dyson vacuum cleaner sucks and sucks and never fails, while a Swiss Admiral …

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